growing up fatherless essays

Essays About Growing Up Without A Father: Top 5 Examples

Writing essays about growing up without a father deals with sensitive issues. To help you with your paper, check out our guide including top essay samples and prompts.

Of the 18.4 million children in America, one in four grows without a father . Writing an essay on this topic can be a great way to convey your feelings and share your experiences with others. If you grew up with a father, it can be an opportunity to learn about the challenges some of your peers may face. 

Learn how to deliver your essay with key research by reading the examples below:

1. Effects of an Absent Father by Anonymous on Eduzaurus.Com

2. life without a father by alexandria, 3. how a boy[’s] life [is] affected when raised without a father by meghan bush, 4. how growing up without a father affects the child by anonymous on gradesfixer.com, 5. growing up fatherless essay by writer jill, 7 writing prompts for essays about growing up without a father, 1. the importance of having a father, 2. reasons why fathers can be absent, 3. life without a father, 4. effects of growing up without a father, 5. my dad and his illness, 6. taking on my father’s responsibilities, 7. without a father, i became….

“Without the role of a strong, loving and supportive father figure in the house, it can break a family and cause significant damage to the child mentally and cause a lap in many areas of their life.”

In this essay, the author mentions the psychological impact of not having a father at home. Repercussions include impulsiveness and anger issues. In addition, getting abandoned often makes the child jump to conclusions and blame themselves. This resentment and hostility lead to illegal substance abuse that ruins lives. The author also tells a story to explain that when the fatherless child grows up and has his children, he will not know how to be a good father because he didn’t have one.

Looking for more? Check out these essays about dads .

“I personally fall into this category and I believe that unless the other parent is deceased, there is no reason why one parent should raise a child.”

Alexandria writes down her thoughts on her mother’s lack of response when her father left their family. She says that it makes her blame herself for all the hardship they’re going through. But, despite her situation, Alexandria learns to respect her mother more, her feat inspiring her to be independent and strong as she is. She believes that no one should grow up fatherless as life is full of ups and downs, and a child will need a father figure to lean on. She advises those unfortunate like her to continue living and have faith in God.

“In life, we are given more than just luck, but an opportunity, a chance to be better and do better each and every day.”

Bush retells the story of two boys from the book “The Other Wes Moore: One Name, Two Fates” and connects it to reality through research studies. She explains that while both boys lost their fathers at a young age, Wes Moore, who lost his father to an illness, had a more challenging time accepting what happened than The Other Wes Moore, whose father was gone from the beginning. Bush also doesn’t believe Wes Moore is luckier than the other boy because they had a choice, and both decided for themselves. Instead, she believes that whoever is there to guide a child as they grow up dramatically influences their future life choices.

“This deviant behavior seems to affect females more than males… On the other hand guys growing up with no dad are more often likely to drop out of school…”

The writer delves into research to examine the impact of growing up fatherless, the common cause, and who is more affected. According to their findings, susceptibility to addictive substances, behavioral problems, and depression are some effects of this unfortunate setup. Parents’ separation is the main reason a child grows up without a dad. In the end, the author concludes that while girls are more psychologically affected by facing life without a dad, it still affects boys in other ways.

“He was never really a father to me. Even after being with him for a couple of days, he was still a complete stranger to me.”

Jill’s essay shows how her story relates to Rick Braggs’s essay. She also includes some lines from his essay to prove it. She says that she grew up knowing nothing about her father except his appearance and the bad things her family said about him. So, when she had to move in with him for a while, Jill had no idea how to act, especially when he tried his best to act like her dad. But, in the end, she lets the readers know that her dad became her best friend, and while their bond is not as strong as other father-daughter duos, she is grateful to have him back.

Here are prompts to inspire you in writing your essay:

Identify and explain to your readers why a father is vital in a home and their child’s life. Write down their roles in raising a child and include things only a father can give his kid, such as essential parenting, life lessons, and a father’s perspective on life. Looking for more? See these essays about brothers .

Use this prompt to learn and discuss the most common reasons a child loses a father. There can be many reasons a father is absent from their child’s life. These include death, childcare difficulties, medical challenges, or choosing to be an absent father for personal reasons. Discuss these reasons in your essay and make sure to include relevant examples and research data to support your reasons.

If you have a personal experience living without a father, share it with your readers if you are comfortable doing so. Relay your story of how it is living without a dad present in your life. Include his reason for absence and how it made you feel. Use this prompt to create a compelling and engaging personal essay for your readers to enjoy.

Use this prompt to discuss how the absence of a father in a home positively and negatively affects the entire family. Then, support your claims by interviewing someone who finds life easier without one parent and adding research results and statistics. For example, the father is abusive, so everyone’s life becomes happier and more peaceful when he leaves. However, losing a father due to death can be catastrophic for some families, resulting in grief and depression.

If you like to write more on this topic, check out other essay topics about family .

Not all fathers leave because they want to evade their obligations. Some just don’t have the chance to stay. This prompt is for all who have lost a father due to an illness. First, introduce your father to your readers, what his passions were, how you bonded, and things you learned from him. Next, write down the most significant change in your life since losing him and explain why. Then, advise others in the same situation on how to move forward with life.

In some cases, when you lose the presence of a parent in the household, the responsibilities can then fall on the children. For this essay, look into the father’s responsibilities and discuss how these responsibilities can burden the children if they lose a parent. If you have personal experience with this, discuss your feelings and the challenges you face. For an interesting essay, conduct interviews with those who live in a fatherless household to understand their experiences.

In this essay, discuss how the absence of a father affected children, for better or worse. Research by conducting interviews to discover the experiences of those who have lived without a father and discuss the difference between the two with your readers. Remember to ask for permission before sharing another person’s personal experience in your essay.

Do you need help with your grammar? Find out in this  Grammarly review  why it’s our top checker.

• Entertainment
• Environment
• Information Science and Technology
• Social Issues

Home Essay Samples Life Growing Up

Growing Up Without a Father: How it Has Affeted My Life

*minimum deadline

Cite this Essay

To export a reference to this article please select a referencing style below

• Quality of Life
• Grandfather

Related Essays

Need writing help?

You can always rely on us no matter what type of paper you need

*No hidden charges

100% Unique Essays

Absolutely Confidential

Money Back Guarantee

By clicking “Send Essay”, you agree to our Terms of service and Privacy statement. We will occasionally send you account related emails

You can also get a UNIQUE essay on this or any other topic

Thank you! We’ll contact you as soon as possible.

Self-Esteem

Fatherless daughters: the impact of absence, a daughter’s sense of self may be shaped by what a father is not able to give..

Posted May 26, 2023 | Reviewed by Davia Sills

• What Is Self-Esteem?
• Take our Self-Esteem Test
• Find a therapist near me
• While most research focuses on the impact of mothering on children, fathers play an important role too.
• From self-confidence to relationships, fathers have a particularly strong influence on daughters.
• Even if a father is physically present, his emotional absence can negatively affect a daughter into adulthood.

One summer day, when I was nine, I came in from playing jump rope, discovered my father unconscious in his chair, and thought he was dead. He survived another 20 years, but for the rest of my childhood and early adulthood, I lived with the fear of losing him. The possibility that, at any moment, I might suddenly be a fatherless daughter shaped the woman I would become.

Mothers and mothering occupy a lot of space in psychological literature, but the role fathers play in a daughter’s development does not get equal attention . The National Initiative for Fatherhood, the nation's leading provider of research on evidence-based fatherhood programs and resources, reports that according to the U.S. Census Bureau’s 2022 data, one in four children in this country lives in a home without a biological, step, or adoptive father. Their research indicates that children raised in a father-absent home face a four times greater risk of poverty, are more likely to have behavioral problems, are at two times greater risk of infant mortality, are more likely to go to prison, commit crimes, become a pregnant teen , abuse drugs or alcohol , drop out of school.[1]

Daughters growing up without a father face specific challenges. Fathers influence their daughters' relational lives, creativity , sense of authority, self-confidence , and self-esteem . Her relationship to her sexuality and response to men will in part be determined by her father’s comfort or discomfort with her gender and her body, starting at birth. (This post addresses one’s personal or biological father. The capacity for “fathering” is not based on anatomy, nor is it gender-specific.)

In post-modern societies, both parents may contribute to the family’s financial stability, or the mother may be the primary wage earner. However, through the lens of patriarchal values, a father is a failure if he cannot provide for and protect his family. Fairytales convey societal and psychological truths in magical settings, and many of the most popular tales— Cinderella, Rapunzel, Rumpelstiltskin, Snow White —depict the reality of inadequate, neglectful, or harmful fathers.

The story of Hansel and Gretel portrays the quintessential feckless father. He can neither provide for his family nor stand up to his wife’s cruel demands. Instead, he succumbs to her insistence that they leave their children in the woods to die so that they, the parents, can have enough to eat.

Why does the father disappear after the first page in some tales as if his relevance hardly matters? In real life, though, we know that an absent father is a haunting presence for his daughter. She will wonder why he left, why he has abandoned her, and if she did something to cause him to disappear. She will look for him in the men in her life or perhaps choose men who are the opposite of her father.

One positive outcome for fatherless daughters is hinted at in some fairy tales, as in The Girl Without Hands . The story recounts the survival challenges faced by a daughter who flees the father who maimed her. With no father and no sympathetic maternal figure to rely on, the heroine undergoes a self-revelatory process. In undertaking a series of impossible tasks, she discovers her moral and emotional strength, her courage and inner authority. She survives and thrives.

Psychotherapist Susan Schwartz has written extensively about the wounds daughters suffer from inadequate or harmful fathers. In The Absent Father Effect on Daughters: Father Desire, Father Wounds , she notes that fathers often have difficulty relating to a daughter’s emotional life. Even if the father is physically present, the daughter may feel unseen and unknown and will take on the burden of this failure as her own. She will feel a lack in herself. She may also strive to fulfill her father’s expectations in sports, in scholarship, in financial success, or she may try to fill his emptiness, his depression , with her own energy. Dr. Schwartz describes how a father’s wounds can depotentiate a daughter’s capacity to use her energy for herself, which can compromise her ability to focus and value who she is.[2]

Author Patricia Reis’s book Daughters of Saturn: From Father’s Daughter to Creative Woman is part memoir about her father, part analysis of the father-daughter relationship. She finds Freud ’s theory that the meaning in life is found in work and love too reductive. For women, she says, another dimension must be added. That question is “Whom do I serve?”—self or other.

“It is not enough to claim our power as women: we must be able to use our powers consciously, knowing where and how our energy is spent, on what, on whom, for what purpose—both in work and in relationships.” [3]

To be a fatherless daughter is to feel abandoned by a paternal figure, emotionally, physically, or both. A father may be absent from the home for reasons beyond his control. The list of reasons is extensive, and each situation impacts a daughter differently. Illness and death may burden her with additional grief , while military service, deportation, adoption , incarceration, divorce , or disinterest will have their own effects. A father who is physically present but emotionally distant, manipulative, abusive, or depressed also sets up a daughter for psychological distress. Her sense of herself, her ambition, her independence, and her trust of the world will be shaped by her relationship with her father.

Fathers who long to have a deeper relationship with their daughters might ask themselves: What is my daughter trying to tell me about herself? What does she want me to see? How can I be more curious about her and her experience in the world? And they might ask their daughters, “How can I be more attentive?”

[1] “ The Statistics Don't Lie: Fathers Matter ,” The National Fatherhood Initiative

[2] Schwartz, Susan, The Absent Father Effect on Daughters: Father Desire, Father Wounds. Routledge, 2020

[3] Reis, Patricia, Daughters of Saturn: From Father’s Daughter to Creative Woman. Continuum International Publishing Group, 1995, Preface pp xiii-xix.

Dale M. Kushner, MFA , explores the intersection of creativity, healing, and spirituality in her writing: her poetry collection M ; novel, The Conditions of Love ; and essays, including in Jung’s Red Book for Our Time .

• Find a Therapist
• Find a Treatment Center
• Find a Psychiatrist
• Find a Support Group
• Find Online Therapy
• United States
• Brooklyn, NY
• Chicago, IL
• Houston, TX
• Los Angeles, CA
• New York, NY
• Portland, OR
• San Diego, CA
• San Francisco, CA
• Seattle, WA
• Washington, DC
• Asperger's
• Bipolar Disorder
• Chronic Pain
• Eating Disorders
• Passive Aggression
• Personality
• Goal Setting
• Positive Psychology
• Stopping Smoking
• Low Sexual Desire
• Relationships
• Child Development
• Self Tests NEW
• Therapy Center
• Diagnosis Dictionary
• Types of Therapy

It’s increasingly common for someone to be diagnosed with a condition such as ADHD or autism as an adult. A diagnosis often brings relief, but it can also come with as many questions as answers.

• Emotional Intelligence
• Gaslighting
• Affective Forecasting
• Neuroscience

June 17, 2022

‘life without father’: less college, less work, and more prison for young men growing up without their biological father.

• Young men who grew up with their biological father are more than twice as likely to graduate college by their late-20s, compared to those raised without their biological father. Tweet This
• Young men who did not grow up with their biological father are significantly more likely to be idle in their mid-20s. Tweet This
• Young men who did not grow up with their father in the home are about twice as likely to have spent time in jail by around age 30. Tweet This

“American fathers are today more removed from family life than ever before in our history,” wrote sociologist David Popenoe in his pathbreaking book,  Life Without Father . “And according to a growing body of evidence, this massive erosion of fatherhood contributes mightily to many of the major social problems of our time.” 

Popenoe wrote these words more than 25 years ago, but his assessment remains as relevant in 2022 as it was in 1996. The decline of marriage and the rise of fatherlessness in America remain at the center of some of the biggest problems facing the nation: crime and violence, school failure, deaths of despair, and children in poverty.

The predicament of the American male is of particular importance here. The percentage of boys living apart from their biological father has almost doubled since 1960—from about  17%  to 32% today; now, an estimated 12 million boys are growing up in families without their biological father. 1 Specifically, approximately 62.5% of boys under 18 are living in an intact-biological family, 1.7% are living in a step-family with their biological father and step- or adoptive mother, 4.2% are living with their single, biological father, and 31.5% are living in a home without their biological father. 2

Lacking the day-to-day involvement, guidance, and positive example of their father in the home, and the financial advantages associated with having him in the household, these boys are more likely to act up, lash out, flounder in school, and fail at work as they move into adolescence and adulthood. Even though not all fathers play a positive role in their children’s lives, on average, boys  benefit  from having a present and involved father.

This Institute for Family Studies research brief details the connections between fatherlessness, family structure, and the increasing number of young men who are floundering in life and pose a threat to themselves and their communities. We do so by exploring the links between family structure and college completion, idleness ( defined here as twenty-somethings not in school or working ), and involvement with the criminal justice system ( measured by arrests and incarceration ) for young men in the 2000s and 2010s, using the National Longitudinal Survey of Youth, 1997 (NLSY97). We specifically examine how young men who were raised in a home with their biological father compare on these outcomes to their peers in families without their biological father. 3 Here is what we found.

Father-Present Families Help Keep Their Sons on the College Track

Boys today are  struggling at all levels of school , falling behind girls in reading and math skills, and are less likely than girls to graduate high school on time. Young men are also  less likely  than young women to attend or  graduate from college . When we think about the many factors behind this  gender gap , family structure is often not the first cause to come to mind. But  as MIT economist David Autor has found , the gender gap in high school, including suspensions and graduation, is larger for boys who did not grow up in married families compared to boys who did. 

In this brief, we examine how the presence of a biological father in the home is linked to a young man’s chances of earning a college degree. As the figure below shows, when it comes to higher education for young men, family structure seems to matter. Young men who grew up with their biological father are more than twice as likely to graduate college by their late-20s, compared to those raised in families without their biological father (35% vs. 14%). Even after controlling for race, family income growing up, maternal education, age, and an AFQT score ( a measure of general knowledge ), we still see that hailing from a home with his own biological father doubles the likelihood that a young man will graduate from college.

Father-Present Families Discourage Idleness

A college degree is not the only measure of success. In fact, getting at least a high school degree and then a full-time job are  two key steps  toward avoiding poverty as adults. Unfortunately, more and more young men today are floundering without purpose and without work. As Nicholas Eberstadt and Evan Abramsky  have reported , the U.S. has seen a surge in the number of prime-age men who are not currently working or looking for work: prior to the pandemic, nearly 7 million men between the ages of 25 and 54 were not working at all. The daily life of these men is often marked by hours in front of a screen while vaping, smoking marijuana, or under the influence of some other kind of substance. 

So how does a father’s presence or absence effect his son’s ability or failure to launch—that is, to be either in school or in the labor force by the time he reaches early adulthood? Once again, we can see the apparent power of a biological father’s presence when it comes to pushing boys out of the house and toward becoming contributing members of society. As the above figure illustrates, young men who did not grow up with their biological father are significantly more likely to be idle in their mid-20s compared to young men who did grow up with their biological father (19% vs. 11%). After controlling for family income growing up, race, maternal education, age, and AFQT, we find that young men who did not grow up with their biological father are almost twice as likely to be idle compared to their male peers from father-present families ( see Appendix table ).

Father-Present Families Help Keep Their Sons Out of Jail  

Of course, dads do more than just help their sons pursue an education and become productive members of society—they also play a major role in keeping their sons out of trouble. Research tells us that involved and present fathers reduce the odds that young men become a threat to society. Warren Farrell, author of  The Boy Crisis ,  puts it this way : “Boys with dad-deprivation often experience a volcano of festering anger … And with boys’ much greater tendency to act out, the boys who hurt will be the ones most likely to hurt us.”

This figure illustrates his point. In addition to being markedly more likely to have been arrested during their teen years, young men who did not grow up with their father in the home are about twice as likely as those raised with their biological father in the household to have spent time in jail by around age 30. These associations remain strong and statistically significant even after controlling for family income, race, maternal education, age, and AFQT scores ( see Appendix table ).

In  Wayward Sons: The Emerging Gender Gap in Labor Markets and Education , economists David Autor and Melanie Wasserman observed that “male children raised in female-headed households are less likely to have a positive male adult household member present,” are “particularly at risk for adverse outcomes across many domains, including high school dropout, criminality, and violence,” and, consequently, “the diminished involvement of the related male parent may magnify the emerging gender gap in educational attainment and labor market outcomes.” 

Our results are consistent with their observations about the nexus between fatherlessness, family structure, and the problems the nation is now seeing among our young men. Too many young men are floundering and falling behind in one way or another—ignoring the imperative to get an education, failing to launch into adulthood, and succumbing to the lure of the street and becoming a threat to the community. This IFS brief reveals that America’s young man problem is disproportionately concentrated among the millions of males who grew up without the benefit of a present biological father. The bottom line: both these men and the nation are paying a heavy price for the breakdown of the family.

Brad Wilcox is director of the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia, The Future of Freedom Fellow of the Institute for Family Studies, and Nonresident Senior Fellow at the American Enterprise Institute. Wendy Wang is director of research at the Institute for Family Studies. Alysse ElHage is editor of the Institute for Family Studies blog.

About the Data & Methodology

The National Longitudinal Survey of Youth, 1997 (NLSY97) follows the lives of a national representative sample of American youth (with black and Hispanic youth oversamples) born between 1980 to 1984. This cohort belongs to the Millennial generation (born between 1980 and 1994) and is the oldest group of Millennials. The survey started in 1997, when the respondents (about 9,000) were ages 12 to 16. The survey interviews were conducted annually from 1997 to 2011 and biennially since then. The analysis in this brief is limited to men, and the outcomes are measured in different life stages of this group of young men:

• Ever been arrested by ages 15-19: Respondents were arrested by the police or taken into custody for an illegal or delinquent offense (not including arrests for minor traffic violations). 
• Idleness at ages 25-29: Respondents were not working nor in school.
• College education by ages 28-34:   Respondents’ highest degree was a Bachelor’s or higher.  
• Ever been incarcerated by ages 28-34:   Respondents reported at least 1 incarceration.   

1. Numbers are calculated based on the 2019 American Community Survey, and Lydia R. Anderson, Paul F. Hemez, and Rose M. Kreider, “Living Arrangements of Children: 2019,”  Current Population Reports , P70-174, U.S. Census Bureau, Washington, DC, 2021.

3. In NLSY97, young men raised in a home with their biological father include those who lived with both biological parents (49%), or a biological father only (3%), or in a two-parent home with a biological father (2%) at the time of their first interview in 1997 (when these young men were ages 12-16). In contrast, young men in father-absent homes include those who lived with their biological mother only, or in a two-parent home with a biological mother and her partner, or with adoptive parents, foster parents, grandparents, etc.  

Related Posts

How dads affect their daughters into adulthood, what three identical strangers reveals about nature and nurture, five facts about today’s single fathers, family breakdown and america’s welfare system, the religious marriage paradox: younger marriage, less divorce, how fathers influence their daughters’ romantic relationships, join the ifs mailing list.

Sign up for our mailing list to receive ongoing updates from IFS.

© 2024 Institute for Family Studies

• Our Mission
• Books & Articles
• Get Married
• Success Sequence
• Public Education

Interested in learning more about the work of the Institute for Family Studies? Please feel free to contact us by using your preferred method detailed below.  

Mailing Address:

P.O. Box 1502 Charlottesville, VA 22902

(434) 260-1048

[email protected]

Media Inquiries

For media inquiries, contact Chris Bullivant ( [email protected] ).

We encourage members of the media interested in learning more about the people and projects behind the work of the Institute for Family Studies to get started by perusing our "Media Kit" materials.

• Accessories
• Facial Hair

Browse all Get Style

• Program Review

Browse all Get Strong

• Relationships
• Social Skills

Browse all Get Social

• Manly Know-How
• Outdoor/Survival

Browse all Get Skilled

in: Fatherhood , People

Brett & Kate McKay • June 17, 2009 • Last updated: June 6, 2021

6 Lessons I Learned About Being a Man from Growing Up Fatherless

Editor’s note: Today we finish up our run of father-themed posts with an article from a different perspective. While having an awesome dad can help you become an awesome man, growing up fatherless can also motivate you to become better than your dad was. Andrew Galasetti used his less then perfect childhood as a springboard into honorable manliness.

Mr. Galasetti is an entrepreneur and the main writer of Lyved.com a blog focusing on various aspects of life and living it to the fullest. Lyved has published a number of popular articles which you may view here. 

Like millions of people, I grew up in a single parent household. My mother divorced my father before I was in kindergarten. My father was a drug user and drinker, beat my mom often, and generally made her life a living hell. After they divorced, my older sister and I would still visit with our father on weekends. But as we grew older, he slowly drifted away from us, until one day, he packed up all his belongings and moved to another state without even a “goodbye.” I was about 10 years old at the time.

From then on we never heard from him, not even with a simple birthday card. It’s been over a decade since he left, so for the majority of the crucial developmental times of my youth, I had no father.

As we all know, growing up in a single-parent household means that the children are more likely to live close or at the poverty line while the parent tries to make ends meet. This is very difficult for everyone, and growing up fatherless brings its own set of difficulties for boys.

The statistics about single-parent households make you believe that every boy who grows up with one parent ends up on drugs, unsuccessful, and in prison, but that’s simply not true. Because of growing up fatherless, I have stayed away from destructive activity and crime and have instead moved into being a successful entrepreneur and towards a mission of changing millions of lives in a positive way.

I was taught a lot of things about being a man from growing up fatherless. Here are 6 lessons that I learned:

#1 Having a child makes you a father but not a “dad”

“What’s the difference?” you might be asking. Well, a father is a proper term for a male that produces a child. But in the eyes of a kid, a father is a “dad” or “daddy.” It’s a name that has to be earned; earned by being supportive of your child both financially and mentally. You don’t become a “dad” without working hard for it or without being there whenever your kids need you.

#2: A man needs to be self-sufficient

Don’t depend on someone else or a trust fund for your well-being and livelihood. At any moment, either could disappear from your life. I was fortunate to realize at an early age that no one is going to hand me my dreams or what I need in life, and that I need to go out there and capture it myself.

Since we live in modern times we aren’t required to farm and hunt to survive on our own. Self-sufficiency is different; it’s now more about thriving as a man than just surviving. These days we can gain self-suficency by doing things like:

• Gaining a varied education

Be open-minded to various cultures, subjects, views, and people. The more things you experience and the more subjects you are knowledgeable about, the more situations you can handle. Seek valuable skills that will make you an asset to employers and communities.

• Not letting fear stop you

Fear is probably the biggest obstacle for most people. It keeps us from success, keeps us from getting what we need, and it keeps us dependent on other people.

#3: Becoming a man doesn’t come with age

Though the law considers any male 18 and over as a “man,” a boy becomes a true man through experiences and by learning from those experiences. Sometimes this can take years past the age of 18 to happen.

Through experience a boy becomes a man by:

• Taking ownerships of failure
• Letting go of stubbornness and accepting lessons
• Knowing how to handle challenging situations and fixing their incorrect reactions and attitudes
• Learning more about themselves

#4: Blaze your own path instead of following someone’s footsteps

I can’t understand why so many young men decide to do exactly what their fathers did with their lives. You may be thinking that it’s easy for me to say this because all I had to aspire to was becoming a drinker, drug user, and abusive deadbeat. But besides that, my father did work; he did construction and odd jobs. That’s a common career that sons decide to pursue because their fathers did.

Any work is worthy work and if  what your dad does or did really is your passion too, then that’s great. But for me, I wanted something different, something more exciting and something that had never been done before. Here’s a great quote that  makes you rethink following so closely in someone’s footsteps:

We are not here to do what has already been done. – Robert Henri

Men go down the path less-traveled and never traveled.

#5: Mental strength is often more necessary than physical

No matter how strong my father is physically, mentally he is weak. He didn’t have the conviction to be a dad. If you want to be a man of great courage and accomplishment, it isn’t going to happen just by hitting the gym and lifting weights. A courageous man stands up for the weak, stands up for what he believes in, faces fear, failure, and criticism. He’s not afraid of responsibility and seeing things through to the end.

#6: Your father doesn’t need to be your father figure

If you have a father who’s incarcerated, or who left you, or who didn’t have much success in life, look for a father figure in someone else. Every man needs a father figure, even far into adulthood. You don’t even need to know him personally, and he doesn’t even need to be alive. Most successful men leave a legacy and lessons behind, whether in a book or video. You can then read, watch, and practice their advice; just like any other father figure. My four most influential father-like figures are Chris Gardner , Andrew Carnegie, Richard Branson, and Randy Pausch .

In addition to studying the lives of great men, seek the companionship and camaraderie of male friends. As Wayne has said, as you open up to these men, they can become “father figures” to you as well.

What a man is and what a man isn’t

So growing up in a fatherless home is something that I’m now proud of experiencing. It has made the line between a boy and a man much clearer for me.

For a quick synopsis and a few more lessons, here is a list of what I learned a man isn’t and what a man is from growing up fatherless:

A man isn’t :

• Someone who runs from his responsibilities
• A person who makes excuses
• A person who strikes a woman
• A man through age – a boy grows into a man through experience
• Someone who stands up for something they believe in, even when they’re fearful
• A person who creates a new path
• Open-minded
• A “dad” when he earns it

Related Posts

Home — Essay Samples — Life — Single Parenting — How Growing Up Without A Father Affects The Child

How Growing Up Without a Father Affects The Child

• Categories: Child Behavior Children Single Parenting

About this sample

Words: 999 |

Published: Oct 2, 2020

Words: 999 | Pages: 2 | 5 min read

Table of contents

Introduction, psychological effects, problems and solutions, summary and conclusion, mental health, overall development.

Cite this Essay

To export a reference to this article please select a referencing style below:

Let us write you an essay from scratch

• 450+ experts on 30 subjects ready to help
• Custom essay delivered in as few as 3 hours

Get high-quality help

Dr Jacklynne

Verified writer

• Expert in: Psychology Life

+ 120 experts online

By clicking “Check Writers’ Offers”, you agree to our terms of service and privacy policy . We’ll occasionally send you promo and account related email

No need to pay just yet!

Related Essays

2 pages / 1104 words

1 pages / 422 words

1 pages / 1033 words

2 pages / 834 words

Remember! This is just a sample.

You can get your custom paper by one of our expert writers.

121 writers online

Still can’t find what you need?

Browse our vast selection of original essay samples, each expertly formatted and styled

Related Essays on Single Parenting

For many years, children growing up in a single parent family have been viewed as different. Being raised by only one parent seems impossible to many yet over the decades it has become more prevalent. In today’s society many [...]

Life without a mother presents unique challenges that touch the core of one's identity, relationships, and emotional well-being. This essay delves into the intricate tapestry of experiences that individuals face when navigating [...]

Single Parent Struggles are a reality faced by many individuals around the world. Being a single parent is a unique journey that comes with a multitude of challenges, yet it also embodies incredible strength and resilience. This [...]

The experience of growing up in a single-parent household has become increasingly prevalent in modern society. A single-parent household is defined as a family structure in which one parent is responsible for raising the [...]

With the passage of time, children grow up in such family would convince to believe or affected by their parents that the feelings of “I am odd” when compare with others. So, Single-parents should establish a sense of [...]

Being a single parent is a multifaceted experience that requires strength, resilience, and determination. Single parents face socioeconomic challenges, emotional struggles, and societal stigmas. However, they also possess unique [...]

Related Topics

By clicking “Send”, you agree to our Terms of service and Privacy statement . We will occasionally send you account related emails.

Where do you want us to send this sample?

By clicking “Continue”, you agree to our terms of service and privacy policy.

Be careful. This essay is not unique

This essay was donated by a student and is likely to have been used and submitted before

Download this Sample

Free samples may contain mistakes and not unique parts

Sorry, we could not paraphrase this essay. Our professional writers can rewrite it and get you a unique paper.

Please check your inbox.

We can write you a custom essay that will follow your exact instructions and meet the deadlines. Let's fix your grades together!

Get Your Personalized Essay in 3 Hours or Less!

We use cookies to personalyze your web-site experience. By continuing we’ll assume you board with our cookie policy .

• Instructions Followed To The Letter
• Deadlines Met At Every Stage
• Unique And Plagiarism Free

< Back to Search

Life Without Father.

Related Resources

• Three Strategies to Engage Mentors to Support Youth Development
• Black Male Mentors | Top 4 Reasons Why They Are Essential

Related Topics

Do you have something you think is appropriate for the library? Submit Library Resources.

Dad Joke Bot

Want to hear a Dad Joke?

• 1 Current: Step 1/3

24/7 writing help on your phone

To install StudyMoose App tap and then “Add to Home Screen”

Growing Up Without a Father

Save to my list

Remove from my list

Growing Up Without a Father. (2020, Jun 02). Retrieved from https://studymoose.com/growing-without-father-new-essay

"Growing Up Without a Father." StudyMoose , 2 Jun 2020, https://studymoose.com/growing-without-father-new-essay

StudyMoose. (2020). Growing Up Without a Father . [Online]. Available at: https://studymoose.com/growing-without-father-new-essay [Accessed: 9 Sep. 2024]

"Growing Up Without a Father." StudyMoose, Jun 02, 2020. Accessed September 9, 2024. https://studymoose.com/growing-without-father-new-essay

"Growing Up Without a Father," StudyMoose , 02-Jun-2020. [Online]. Available: https://studymoose.com/growing-without-father-new-essay. [Accessed: 9-Sep-2024]

StudyMoose. (2020). Growing Up Without a Father . [Online]. Available at: https://studymoose.com/growing-without-father-new-essay [Accessed: 9-Sep-2024]

• Single Parent Families Without Father Pages: 5 (1484 words)
• Is Herodotus the father of History or the father of lies? Pages: 5 (1407 words)
• There can be no daily democracy without daily citizenship Pages: 2 (567 words)
• Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking Pages: 8 (2342 words)
• First Union: An Office Without Walls Pages: 6 (1743 words)
• A Society Without Culture Is As Good As Dead Pages: 7 (1978 words)
• Bruce Dawe's "Enter Without So Much As Knocking" Pages: 5 (1468 words)
• Book Review Share Jesus Without Fear Pages: 6 (1697 words)
• Shahrnush Parsipur’s Women Without Men: A Review and Critique Pages: 5 (1373 words)
• Language is a system of differences without positive terms Pages: 8 (2369 words)

👋 Hi! I’m your smart assistant Amy!

Don’t know where to start? Type your requirements and I’ll connect you to an academic expert within 3 minutes.

• Skip to main content
• Keyboard shortcuts for audio player

Poverty, Dropouts, Pregnancy, Suicide: What The Numbers Say About Fatherless Kids

Claudio Sanchez

The growing number of fatherless children in this country poses one of the the most serious problems in education today, according to best-selling author Alan Blankstein.

He has spent most of his life advocating for kids who struggle in school. He wrote Failure is Not an Option , a guide to creating high-performing schools for all students.

So, just how many kids are fatherless? NPR Ed put that question to Blankstein, who told us that 24.7 million kids in the U.S. don't live with a biological father.

Our interview with Blankstein has been edited for clarity.

You cite a U.S. Department of Education study that found 39 percent of students , first through 12th grade, are fatherless.

Fatherlessness is having a great impact on education. First of all, it's growing, and the correlations with any number of risk issues are considerable.

Children are four-times more likely to be poor if the father is not around. And we know that poverty is heavily associated with academic success. [Fatherless kids] are also twice as likely to drop out.

Dropping out of school, growing up fatherless and incarceration appear to be connected. One study you cite from 2012 titled, "The Vital Importance of Paternal Presence in Children's Lives," shows that seven out of 10 high school dropouts are fatherless.

Do school officials acknowledge that this "chain reaction" clearly gets in the way of children's academic success?

You know, I've been in this for 30 years, and when I speak to superintendents, social service people and counselors in schools, they'll easily acknowledge that at the root of kids' [academic] problems, is the lack of a relationship with their father.

Does fatherlessness affect boys differently than girls?

The research that I've seen says that girls are twice as likely to suffer from obesity without the father present. They're four-times more likely to get pregnant as teenagers. Boys are more likely to act out, which is why we're more aware [of how they're affected], but if a young girl is imploding, we don' t see it.

What's the role of race and class?

Race and class matter , as it does in everything in America, but the overall trend [of fatherlessness] is up for all families. So we're looking at a 20 percent rate among white fathers who are absent in their children's lives, 31 percent for Hispanics, 57 percent for African-Americans.

We're hearing a lot about teen suicide these days. You say the data you've looked at suggest that children growing up without a father are more than twice as likely to commit suicide.

It's a tragic outcome that could be prevented. Inclusion of a father is possible, especially if he's interested. But [often fathers are] being denied, and that's not unusual. When a father's access to his child is minimized, or kept to every other weekend, the father is not involved with his child or his child's school.

But what if a marriage falls apart and the father's presence does more harm than good?

There are some deadbeat dads who are not interested. For those who love their children but are destructive, need support, or intervention, they don't need to be banished. That leaves a huge hole in a child's life. The issue is not whether the mother and father are separated. The real issue is, what is the relationship that's maintained and encouraged between the father and the child?

It's rarely the case that the child wants one of the parents banished from their life, even when the parent isn't that good.

Do you know of effective interventions designed by schools to help students who are fatherless and hurting?

I don't see a lot happening in schools. I think [successful] interventions are happening in a random way, at best. Like the case of John Marshall Elementary in Philadelphia. They're working with a [city-wide] commission on families to include fathers in promoting the academic well-being of students. Most schools don't recognize or engage fathers [who've been absent].

The Consequences of Fatherlessness

Some fathering advocates would say that almost every social ill faced by America’s children is related to fatherlessness. Six are noted here. (Also see related fatherlessness epidemic infographic)

As supported by the data below, children from fatherless homes are more likely to be poor, become involved in drug and alcohol abuse, drop out of school, and suffer from health and emotional problems. Boys are more likely to become involved in crime, and girls are more likely to become pregnant as teens.

– Children in father-absent homes are almost four times more likely to be poor. In 2011, 12 percent of children in married-couple families were living in poverty, compared to 44 percent of children in mother-only families.

Source: U.S. Census Bureau, Children’s Living Arrangements and Characteristics: March 2011, Table C8. Washington D.C.: 2011.  

– Children living in female-headed families with no spouse present had a poverty rate of 47.6 percent, over 4 times the rate in married-couple families.

Source: U.S. Department of Health and Human Services; ASEP Issue Brief: Information on Poverty and Income Statistics. September 12, 2012 http://aspe.hhs.gov/hsp/12/PovertyAndIncomeEst/ib.shtml