what are college admissions looking for in an essay

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Advice from Undergraduate Admissions Officers

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From Dr. Douglas Christiansen, Vice Provost for Enrollment and Dean of Admissions at Vanderbilt University:

The essay is the one opportunity each student has to give a college or university insight into his or her innermost thoughts, aspirations, dreams, and personal realities. It is to the student’s advantage to use this opportunity to let admissions officers see beyond the test scores and grades. Students can explain why there may have been a lapse in grades or other important life events that have changed their high-school careers. More important than the experience is what the student reveals about how the experience has changed his/her life, how (s)he has grown and made different choices as a result of the experience, and how (s)he has improved his or her corner of the world as a result. Through the essay, regardless of the topic, it is possible to enlighten the reader regarding choices that have led to personal growth, involvement, and success or failure as a result. Through the essay, the admissions officers should be able to see more clearly the intangible characteristics of the applicant: honesty, integrity, commitment, ethical choices, perseverance, empathy, and leadership. When the number of applications is in the thousands, and the admit rate is only 10 – 15% of those applications, explaining why one student is different than all the rest is key – the essay is the opportunity to do just that!

From Stacey Kostell, Assistant Provost and Director of Undergraduate Admissions at the University of Illinois:

When writing your application essays, it is vital that you answer the question asked and address any specific criteria noted. I’ve read thousands of essays and have realized that there are the five factors shared by all successful applicants.

Be prepared. Slow down and fully consider the questions and your answers. You should then create an outline, write a first draft, and edit multiple times.

Be personal. Provide specific examples of your experiences and goals. Generalizations do not help the admissions committee get a sense of who you are and why you’ll make the most of your time at the university.

Be direct. Choose your words wisely in order to clearly state your message. Many universities have a word limit on responses, whichmeans there is no room for fluff.

Be focused. There is no need to repeat your transcript. Instead, share how your qualifications will be a benefit to you at the university.

Be professional. Submit the best possible essays, free of spelling and grammatical errors. You should proofread and edit them yourself; however, request critiques from counselors, teachers, and your parents. It’s always helpful to have feedback from readers.

From Courtney McAnuff, Vice President of Enrollment at Rutgers University:

This is the one time it really is all about you; colleges want to know what makes you unique. The essay is a critical component for our holistic review. Express yourself honestly. Review the essay question, and jot down your immediate responses. Don’t Google the question to see what others have written for their essays. If you can’t resist, at least write your outline first, and stay true to yourself in the final version. The requested essay topics reflect each college’s interests in shaping their incoming class. Writing on the requested essay topic should interest you. Be sure you answer the specific topic; don’t just tweak a generic essay. If the topic doesn’t engage you, think about why that college is one of your choices. Do submit the essay exactly how the school requested it. The care you take in following directions can be seen by the school as an indicator of what type of student you are now. Try to do everything at least two weeks before the deadline to cover every computer crash/power outage/school closing possibility.

From James Nondorf, Vice President and Dean of Admissions and Financial Aid at the University of Chicago:

For many colleges and universities, the essays are a crucial element of the application process. They provide you with a chance to let admissions officers get to know you beyond just your transcripts and test scores. The most important part of any college admissions essay, then, is to write something you believe truly represents your unique voice—something that, beyond demonstrating your competencies as a writer, also displays your ability to be a creative and critical thinker and to make unique contributions to an academic community. First and foremost, it’s important to respond directly to the prompt given (admissions officers can tell when you’re fudging and trying to write your way into a different essay topic), but beyond that, creativity is key. Don’t settle for the first idea that comes to mind or the first draft you put to paper. Keep revising until you feel you have an essay that reflects your original perspective. And, really, you should try to have fun with your essays—exercise your sense of humor, write about something you’re passionate about, and write in a way you find inspiring. The more you enjoy writing your essay, the more we’ll enjoy reading it.

From Kasey Urquidez, Dean of Undergraduate Admissions at The University of Arizona:

Your statement gives you the opportunity to show the college or university to which you are applying a chance to learn more about you. While your academic preparation is very important, your statement will help you shine.

Taking time to write your best statement before submitting is important. Here are a few tips as you write your statement:

• Be yourself.
• Focus on one topic and making an impression. What will be remembered?
• Use appropriate, yet colorful, vivid language to express yourself.
• Be descriptive.
• Share new information. Reiterating what you already included in your application is not very helpful.
• Provide a strong opening and closing. You will want your reader to want to know more from your opening and remember you from your closing.
• Know your audience. Admissions representatives from diverse backgrounds of all ages will read your statement.
• Read the instructions carefully and pay attention to word limits.
• Write a rough draft.
• Do not rely on spell check.
• Read your statement aloud to help you “hear” what it will sound like to others.
• Select a few people you trust to proof read your work.
• Submit once you're completely satisfied!

From Jarrid James Whitney, Executive Director of Admissions and Financial Aid at California Institute of Technology:

When applying to colleges, I often remind students that their responses to the essay prompts are, in essence, like a personal interview with the admissions committee. That is, they should open up about what’s important to them and cover topics that are meaningful, and specifically address important items that may not come up in the rest of the application or even stress other parts of the application.

The essays are really a reflection of who an applicant is, and thus the student’s voice is critical. Often times students get others to help them craft their responses, which is fine, but I also remind students not to lose the essence of who they are. The story still has to be their own.

It is also very important that the student make sure they tie the essay back to themselves. Students tend to get caught up in a great story about another person, place, or thing, and forget they need to bring it back to why that person, place or thing is important to them. Also, remember that the short answer responses are just as significant to an admissions committee as the long personal statements.

Finally, students need to take time in preparing their responses. Most essays will probably go through many drafts, which is expected, since writing is truly an art. Ultimately, colleges are looking for the right fit so hopefully those essays can help to confirm if the college, and the student, are a match.

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187 College Essay Examples for 11 Schools + Expert Analysis

College Admissions , College Essays

The personal statement might just be the hardest part of your college application. Mostly this is because it has the least guidance and is the most open-ended. One way to understand what colleges are looking for when they ask you to write an essay is to check out the essays of students who already got in—college essays that actually worked. After all, they must be among the most successful of this weird literary genre.

In this article, I'll go through general guidelines for what makes great college essays great. I've also compiled an enormous list of 100+ actual sample college essays from 11 different schools. Finally, I'll break down two of these published college essay examples and explain why and how they work. With links to 187 full essays and essay excerpts , this article is a great resource for learning how to craft your own personal college admissions essay!

What Excellent College Essays Have in Common

Even though in many ways these sample college essays are very different from one other, they do share some traits you should try to emulate as you write your own essay.

Visible Signs of Planning

Building out from a narrow, concrete focus. You'll see a similar structure in many of the essays. The author starts with a very detailed story of an event or description of a person or place. After this sense-heavy imagery, the essay expands out to make a broader point about the author, and connects this very memorable experience to the author's present situation, state of mind, newfound understanding, or maturity level.

Knowing how to tell a story. Some of the experiences in these essays are one-of-a-kind. But most deal with the stuff of everyday life. What sets them apart is the way the author approaches the topic: analyzing it for drama and humor, for its moving qualities, for what it says about the author's world, and for how it connects to the author's emotional life.

Stellar Execution

A killer first sentence. You've heard it before, and you'll hear it again: you have to suck the reader in, and the best place to do that is the first sentence. Great first sentences are punchy. They are like cliffhangers, setting up an exciting scene or an unusual situation with an unclear conclusion, in order to make the reader want to know more. Don't take my word for it—check out these 22 first sentences from Stanford applicants and tell me you don't want to read the rest of those essays to find out what happens!

A lively, individual voice. Writing is for readers. In this case, your reader is an admissions officer who has read thousands of essays before yours and will read thousands after. Your goal? Don't bore your reader. Use interesting descriptions, stay away from clichés, include your own offbeat observations—anything that makes this essay sounds like you and not like anyone else.

Technical correctness. No spelling mistakes, no grammar weirdness, no syntax issues, no punctuation snafus—each of these sample college essays has been formatted and proofread perfectly. If this kind of exactness is not your strong suit, you're in luck! All colleges advise applicants to have their essays looked over several times by parents, teachers, mentors, and anyone else who can spot a comma splice. Your essay must be your own work, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with getting help polishing it.

And if you need more guidance, connect with PrepScholar's expert admissions consultants . These expert writers know exactly what college admissions committees look for in an admissions essay and chan help you craft an essay that boosts your chances of getting into your dream school.

Check out PrepScholar's Essay Editing and Coaching progra m for more details!

Links to Full College Essay Examples

Some colleges publish a selection of their favorite accepted college essays that worked, and I've put together a selection of over 100 of these.

Common App Essay Samples

Please note that some of these college essay examples may be responding to prompts that are no longer in use. The current Common App prompts are as follows:

1. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story. 2. The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience? 3. Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome? 4. Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you? 5. Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others. 6. Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?

7. Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you've already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

Now, let's get to the good stuff: the list of 187 college essay examples responding to current and past Common App essay prompts. 

Connecticut college.

• 12 Common Application essays from the classes of 2022-2025

Hamilton College

• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2026
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2022
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2018
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2012
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2007

Johns Hopkins

These essays are answers to past prompts from either the Common Application or the Coalition Application (which Johns Hopkins used to accept).

• 1 Common Application or Coalition Application essay from the class of 2026
• 6 Common Application or Coalition Application essays from the class of 2025
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2024
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2023
• 7 Common Application of Universal Application essays from the class of 2022
• 5 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2021
• 7 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2020

Essay Examples Published by Other Websites

• 2 Common Application essays ( 1st essay , 2nd essay ) from applicants admitted to Columbia

Other Sample College Essays

Here is a collection of essays that are college-specific.

Babson College

• 4 essays (and 1 video response) on "Why Babson" from the class of 2020

Emory University

• 5 essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) from the class of 2020 along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on why the essays were exceptional
• 5 more recent essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on what made these essays stand out

University of Georgia

• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2019
• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2018
• 10 Harvard essays from 2024
• 10 Harvard essays from 2023
• 10 Harvard essays from 2022
• 10 Harvard essays from 2021
• 10 Harvard essays from 2020
• 10 Harvard essays from 2019
• 10 Harvard essays from 2018
• 6 essays from admitted MIT students

Smith College

• 6 "best gift" essays from the class of 2018

Books of College Essays

If you're looking for even more sample college essays, consider purchasing a college essay book. The best of these include dozens of essays that worked and feedback from real admissions officers.

College Essays That Made a Difference —This detailed guide from Princeton Review includes not only successful essays, but also interviews with admissions officers and full student profiles.

50 Successful Harvard Application Essays by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson—A must for anyone aspiring to Harvard .

50 Successful Ivy League Application Essays and 50 Successful Stanford Application Essays by Gen and Kelly Tanabe—For essays from other top schools, check out this venerated series, which is regularly updated with new essays.

Analyzing Great Common App Essays That Worked

I've picked two essays from the examples collected above to examine in more depth so that you can see exactly what makes a successful college essay work. Full credit for these essays goes to the original authors and the schools that published them.

Example 1: "Breaking Into Cars," by Stephen, Johns Hopkins Class of '19 (Common App Essay, 636 words long)

I had never broken into a car before.

We were in Laredo, having just finished our first day at a Habitat for Humanity work site. The Hotchkiss volunteers had already left, off to enjoy some Texas BBQ, leaving me behind with the college kids to clean up. Not until we were stranded did we realize we were locked out of the van.

Someone picked a coat hanger out of the dumpster, handed it to me, and took a few steps back.

"Can you do that thing with a coat hanger to unlock it?"

"Why me?" I thought.

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame. Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally. My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed. "The water's on fire! Clear a hole!" he shouted, tossing me in the lake without warning. While I'm still unconvinced about that particular lesson's practicality, my Dad's overarching message is unequivocally true: much of life is unexpected, and you have to deal with the twists and turns.

Living in my family, days rarely unfolded as planned. A bit overlooked, a little pushed around, I learned to roll with reality, negotiate a quick deal, and give the improbable a try. I don't sweat the small stuff, and I definitely don't expect perfect fairness. So what if our dining room table only has six chairs for seven people? Someone learns the importance of punctuality every night.

But more than punctuality and a special affinity for musical chairs, my family life has taught me to thrive in situations over which I have no power. Growing up, I never controlled my older siblings, but I learned how to thwart their attempts to control me. I forged alliances, and realigned them as necessary. Sometimes, I was the poor, defenseless little brother; sometimes I was the omniscient elder. Different things to different people, as the situation demanded. I learned to adapt.

Back then, these techniques were merely reactions undertaken to ensure my survival. But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The question caught me off guard, much like the question posed to me in Laredo. Then, I realized I knew the answer. I knew why the coat hanger had been handed to me.

Growing up as the middle child in my family, I was a vital participant in a thing I did not govern, in the company of people I did not choose. It's family. It's society. And often, it's chaos. You participate by letting go of the small stuff, not expecting order and perfection, and facing the unexpected with confidence, optimism, and preparedness. My family experience taught me to face a serendipitous world with confidence.

What Makes This Essay Tick?

It's very helpful to take writing apart in order to see just how it accomplishes its objectives. Stephen's essay is very effective. Let's find out why!

An Opening Line That Draws You In

In just eight words, we get: scene-setting (he is standing next to a car about to break in), the idea of crossing a boundary (he is maybe about to do an illegal thing for the first time), and a cliffhanger (we are thinking: is he going to get caught? Is he headed for a life of crime? Is he about to be scared straight?).

Great, Detailed Opening Story

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame.

It's the details that really make this small experience come alive. Notice how whenever he can, Stephen uses a more specific, descriptive word in place of a more generic one. The volunteers aren't going to get food or dinner; they're going for "Texas BBQ." The coat hanger comes from "a dumpster." Stephen doesn't just move the coat hanger—he "jiggles" it.

Details also help us visualize the emotions of the people in the scene. The person who hands Stephen the coat hanger isn't just uncomfortable or nervous; he "takes a few steps back"—a description of movement that conveys feelings. Finally, the detail of actual speech makes the scene pop. Instead of writing that the other guy asked him to unlock the van, Stephen has the guy actually say his own words in a way that sounds like a teenager talking.

Turning a Specific Incident Into a Deeper Insight

Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

Stephen makes the locked car experience a meaningful illustration of how he has learned to be resourceful and ready for anything, and he also makes this turn from the specific to the broad through an elegant play on the two meanings of the word "click."

Using Concrete Examples When Making Abstract Claims

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally.

"Unpredictability and chaos" are very abstract, not easily visualized concepts. They could also mean any number of things—violence, abandonment, poverty, mental instability. By instantly following up with highly finite and unambiguous illustrations like "family of seven" and "siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing," Stephen grounds the abstraction in something that is easy to picture: a large, noisy family.

Using Small Bits of Humor and Casual Word Choice

My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed.

Obviously, knowing how to clean burning oil is not high on the list of things every 9-year-old needs to know. To emphasize this, Stephen uses sarcasm by bringing up a situation that is clearly over-the-top: "in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed."

The humor also feels relaxed. Part of this is because he introduces it with the colloquial phrase "you know," so it sounds like he is talking to us in person. This approach also diffuses the potential discomfort of the reader with his father's strictness—since he is making jokes about it, clearly he is OK. Notice, though, that this doesn't occur very much in the essay. This helps keep the tone meaningful and serious rather than flippant.

An Ending That Stretches the Insight Into the Future

But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The ending of the essay reveals that Stephen's life has been one long preparation for the future. He has emerged from chaos and his dad's approach to parenting as a person who can thrive in a world that he can't control.

This connection of past experience to current maturity and self-knowledge is a key element in all successful personal essays. Colleges are very much looking for mature, self-aware applicants. These are the qualities of successful college students, who will be able to navigate the independence college classes require and the responsibility and quasi-adulthood of college life.

What Could This Essay Do Even Better?

Even the best essays aren't perfect, and even the world's greatest writers will tell you that writing is never "finished"—just "due." So what would we tweak in this essay if we could?

Replace some of the clichéd language. Stephen uses handy phrases like "twists and turns" and "don't sweat the small stuff" as a kind of shorthand for explaining his relationship to chaos and unpredictability. But using too many of these ready-made expressions runs the risk of clouding out your own voice and replacing it with something expected and boring.

Use another example from recent life. Stephen's first example (breaking into the van in Laredo) is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation. But his essay also emphasizes that he "learned to adapt" by being "different things to different people." It would be great to see how this plays out outside his family, either in the situation in Laredo or another context.

Example 2: By Renner Kwittken, Tufts Class of '23 (Common App Essay, 645 words long)

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver. I saw it in my favorite book, Richard Scarry's "Cars and Trucks and Things That Go," and for some reason, I was absolutely obsessed with the idea of driving a giant pickle. Much to the discontent of my younger sister, I insisted that my parents read us that book as many nights as possible so we could find goldbug, a small little golden bug, on every page. I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Then I discovered a real goldbug: gold nanoparticles that can reprogram macrophages to assist in killing tumors, produce clear images of them without sacrificing the subject, and heat them to obliteration.

Suddenly the destination of my pickle was clear.

I quickly became enveloped by the world of nanomedicine; I scoured articles about liposomes, polymeric micelles, dendrimers, targeting ligands, and self-assembling nanoparticles, all conquering cancer in some exotic way. Completely absorbed, I set out to find a mentor to dive even deeper into these topics. After several rejections, I was immensely grateful to receive an invitation to work alongside Dr. Sangeeta Ray at Johns Hopkins.

In the lab, Dr. Ray encouraged a great amount of autonomy to design and implement my own procedures. I chose to attack a problem that affects the entire field of nanomedicine: nanoparticles consistently fail to translate from animal studies into clinical trials. Jumping off recent literature, I set out to see if a pre-dose of a common chemotherapeutic could enhance nanoparticle delivery in aggressive prostate cancer, creating three novel constructs based on three different linear polymers, each using fluorescent dye (although no gold, sorry goldbug!). Though using radioactive isotopes like Gallium and Yttrium would have been incredible, as a 17-year-old, I unfortunately wasn't allowed in the same room as these radioactive materials (even though I took a Geiger counter to a pair of shoes and found them to be slightly dangerous).

I hadn't expected my hypothesis to work, as the research project would have ideally been led across two full years. Yet while there are still many optimizations and revisions to be done, I was thrilled to find -- with completely new nanoparticles that may one day mean future trials will use particles with the initials "RK-1" -- thatcyclophosphamide did indeed increase nanoparticle delivery to the tumor in a statistically significant way.

A secondary, unexpected research project was living alone in Baltimore, a new city to me, surrounded by people much older than I. Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research. Whether in a presentation or in a casual conversation, making others interested in science is perhaps more exciting to me than the research itself. This solidified a new pursuit to angle my love for writing towards illuminating science in ways people can understand, adding value to a society that can certainly benefit from more scientific literacy.

It seems fitting that my goals are still transforming: in Scarry's book, there is not just one goldbug, there is one on every page. With each new experience, I'm learning that it isn't the goldbug itself, but rather the act of searching for the goldbugs that will encourage, shape, and refine my ever-evolving passions. Regardless of the goldbug I seek -- I know my pickle truck has just begun its journey.

Renner takes a somewhat different approach than Stephen, but their essay is just as detailed and engaging. Let's go through some of the strengths of this essay.

One Clear Governing Metaphor

This essay is ultimately about two things: Renner’s dreams and future career goals, and Renner’s philosophy on goal-setting and achieving one’s dreams.

But instead of listing off all the amazing things they’ve done to pursue their dream of working in nanomedicine, Renner tells a powerful, unique story instead. To set up the narrative, Renner opens the essay by connecting their experiences with goal-setting and dream-chasing all the way back to a memorable childhood experience:

This lighthearted–but relevant!--story about the moment when Renner first developed a passion for a specific career (“finding the goldbug”) provides an anchor point for the rest of the essay. As Renner pivots to describing their current dreams and goals–working in nanomedicine–the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” is reflected in Renner’s experiments, rejections, and new discoveries.

Though Renner tells multiple stories about their quest to “find the goldbug,” or, in other words, pursue their passion, each story is connected by a unifying theme; namely, that as we search and grow over time, our goals will transform…and that’s okay! By the end of the essay, Renner uses the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” to reiterate the relevance of the opening story:

While the earlier parts of the essay convey Renner’s core message by showing, the final, concluding paragraph sums up Renner’s insights by telling. By briefly and clearly stating the relevance of the goldbug metaphor to their own philosophy on goals and dreams, Renner demonstrates their creativity, insight, and eagerness to grow and evolve as the journey continues into college.

An Engaging, Individual Voice

This essay uses many techniques that make Renner sound genuine and make the reader feel like we already know them.

Technique #1: humor. Notice Renner's gentle and relaxed humor that lightly mocks their younger self's grand ambitions (this is different from the more sarcastic kind of humor used by Stephen in the first essay—you could never mistake one writer for the other).

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver.

I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Renner gives a great example of how to use humor to your advantage in college essays. You don’t want to come off as too self-deprecating or sarcastic, but telling a lightheartedly humorous story about your younger self that also showcases how you’ve grown and changed over time can set the right tone for your entire essay.

Technique #2: intentional, eye-catching structure. The second technique is the way Renner uses a unique structure to bolster the tone and themes of their essay . The structure of your essay can have a major impact on how your ideas come across…so it’s important to give it just as much thought as the content of your essay!

For instance, Renner does a great job of using one-line paragraphs to create dramatic emphasis and to make clear transitions from one phase of the story to the next:

Suddenly the destination of my pickle car was clear.

Not only does the one-liner above signal that Renner is moving into a new phase of the narrative (their nanoparticle research experiences), it also tells the reader that this is a big moment in Renner’s story. It’s clear that Renner made a major discovery that changed the course of their goal pursuit and dream-chasing. Through structure, Renner conveys excitement and entices the reader to keep pushing forward to the next part of the story.

Technique #3: playing with syntax. The third technique is to use sentences of varying length, syntax, and structure. Most of the essay's written in standard English and uses grammatically correct sentences. However, at key moments, Renner emphasizes that the reader needs to sit up and pay attention by switching to short, colloquial, differently punctuated, and sometimes fragmented sentences.

Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research.

In the examples above, Renner switches adeptly between long, flowing sentences and quippy, telegraphic ones. At the same time, Renner uses these different sentence lengths intentionally. As they describe their experiences in new places, they use longer sentences to immerse the reader in the sights, smells, and sounds of those experiences. And when it’s time to get a big, key idea across, Renner switches to a short, punchy sentence to stop the reader in their tracks.

The varying syntax and sentence lengths pull the reader into the narrative and set up crucial “aha” moments when it’s most important…which is a surefire way to make any college essay stand out.

Renner's essay is very strong, but there are still a few little things that could be improved.

Connecting the research experiences to the theme of “finding the goldbug.”  The essay begins and ends with Renner’s connection to the idea of “finding the goldbug.” And while this metaphor is deftly tied into the essay’s intro and conclusion, it isn’t entirely clear what Renner’s big findings were during the research experiences that are described in the middle of the essay. It would be great to add a sentence or two stating what Renner’s big takeaways (or “goldbugs”) were from these experiences, which add more cohesion to the essay as a whole.

Give more details about discovering the world of nanomedicine. It makes sense that Renner wants to get into the details of their big research experiences as quickly as possible. After all, these are the details that show Renner’s dedication to nanomedicine! But a smoother transition from the opening pickle car/goldbug story to Renner’s “real goldbug” of nanoparticles would help the reader understand why nanoparticles became Renner’s goldbug. Finding out why Renner is so motivated to study nanomedicine–and perhaps what put them on to this field of study–would help readers fully understand why Renner chose this path in the first place.

4 Essential Tips for Writing Your Own Essay

How can you use this discussion to better your own college essay? Here are some suggestions for ways to use this resource effectively.

#1: Get Help From the Experts

Getting your college applications together takes a lot of work and can be pretty intimidatin g. Essays are even more important than ever now that admissions processes are changing and schools are going test-optional and removing diversity standards thanks to new Supreme Court rulings .  If you want certified expert help that really makes a difference, get started with  PrepScholar’s Essay Editing and Coaching program. Our program can help you put together an incredible essay from idea to completion so that your application stands out from the crowd. We've helped students get into the best colleges in the United States, including Harvard, Stanford, and Yale.  If you're ready to take the next step and boost your odds of getting into your dream school, connect with our experts today .

#2: Read Other Essays to Get Ideas for Your Own

As you go through the essays we've compiled for you above, ask yourself the following questions:

• Can you explain to yourself (or someone else!) why the opening sentence works well?
• Look for the essay's detailed personal anecdote. What senses is the author describing? Can you easily picture the scene in your mind's eye?
• Find the place where this anecdote bridges into a larger insight about the author. How does the essay connect the two? How does the anecdote work as an example of the author's characteristic, trait, or skill?
• Check out the essay's tone. If it's funny, can you find the places where the humor comes from? If it's sad and moving, can you find the imagery and description of feelings that make you moved? If it's serious, can you see how word choice adds to this tone?

Make a note whenever you find an essay or part of an essay that you think was particularly well-written, and think about what you like about it . Is it funny? Does it help you really get to know the writer? Does it show what makes the writer unique? Once you have your list, keep it next to you while writing your essay to remind yourself to try and use those same techniques in your own essay.

#3: Find Your "A-Ha!" Moment

All of these essays rely on connecting with the reader through a heartfelt, highly descriptive scene from the author's life. It can either be very dramatic (did you survive a plane crash?) or it can be completely mundane (did you finally beat your dad at Scrabble?). Either way, it should be personal and revealing about you, your personality, and the way you are now that you are entering the adult world.

Check out essays by authors like John Jeremiah Sullivan , Leslie Jamison , Hanif Abdurraqib , and Esmé Weijun Wang to get more examples of how to craft a compelling personal narrative.

#4: Start Early, Revise Often

Let me level with you: the best writing isn't writing at all. It's rewriting. And in order to have time to rewrite, you have to start way before the application deadline. My advice is to write your first draft at least two months before your applications are due.

Let it sit for a few days untouched. Then come back to it with fresh eyes and think critically about what you've written. What's extra? What's missing? What is in the wrong place? What doesn't make sense? Don't be afraid to take it apart and rearrange sections. Do this several times over, and your essay will be much better for it!

For more editing tips, check out a style guide like Dreyer's English or Eats, Shoots & Leaves .

What's Next?

Still not sure which colleges you want to apply to? Our experts will show you how to make a college list that will help you choose a college that's right for you.

Interested in learning more about college essays? Check out our detailed breakdown of exactly how personal statements work in an application , some suggestions on what to avoid when writing your essay , and our guide to writing about your extracurricular activities .

Working on the rest of your application? Read what admissions officers wish applicants knew before applying .

The recommendations in this post are based solely on our knowledge and experience. If you purchase an item through one of our links PrepScholar may receive a commission.

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The Perfect College Application Essay: Topics, Prompts, and Tips

At Their Most Basic, College Admissions Essays Are Personal Statements That Students Write In Order To Complete Their Application And Apply To College.

Of course, that makes college essays seem easy. In reality, writing a college application essay is a complex process that every college-hopeful will have to go through. It involves personal reflection, patience, practice, and lots of outside help.

Fortunately, we’ve got everything you’ll need to prepare for writing an essay of your own.!

This article will cover how to write a college application essay, including common mistakes made on college essays, personal statement topics, tips for writing a successful admissions essay, and what the best admissions essays include. If you’re ready to take your college essays to the next level, then read on!

What You’ll Find In This Article:

• What You Need to Know About College Admissions Essays
• 6 Mistakes Students Make on College Application Essays
• Common Requirements for College Essays
• What Colleges Look for in an Admissions Essay
• 5 College Application Essay Topics and Prompts
• How to Write the Perfect College Application Essay
• Preparing for the Road Ahead

What You Need To Know About College Admissions Essays

When discussing college applications, one of the most crucial parts to understand is the essay, or personal statement.

You see, the college admissions process is not totally determined by numbers. This makes the admissions essay one of the most critical part of the application for students, because it allows them to show admissions officers who they really are.

While GPA, extracurricular activities, and academic achievements are important, the undergraduate experience is more focused on individuality and community. College admissions officers want to know how students will fit into their school culture, and the essay is typically how they judge that. Your GPA, SAT and ACT scores simply don’t paint the full picture of what you might bring to a college’s campus.

However, this is actually a huge benefit for you!

Even if your GPA or SAT scores aren’t perfect, you still have the opportunity to write an amazing college admissions essay—and often, this is the deciding factor between an average versus an outstanding college application!

6 Mistakes Students Make On College Application Essays

Some of the biggest downfalls for students writing college admissions essays are actually common mistakes that are easy to avoid—so long as you know what to look for.

Often times students fall into the trap of writing about their accomplishments and not themselves, miss the point of the prompt, or simply don’t edit what they wrote. Knowing these common mistakes can help guide you on what to do and what not to do when writing your essay.

#1: YOUR ESSAY READS LIKE A RESUME...

The point of a college application essay is to be personal, hence college essays often being called “personal statements.”

Most college essay prompts ask you not for a list of accomplishments or credentials, but for a personal essay that gives insight into who you are and what you could offer a college community.

You’ve already sent colleges your transcript, test scores, AP or IB classes, and lists of your activities. That portion of the application acted like a resume, meaning the essay is where you can focus on a unique experience or event that shaped who you are. If you miss this opportunity to talk about yourself, you’re also missing out on your best chance to stand apart from other applicants.

Which leads to another big mistake…

#2: YOU FOCUS ON OTHERS RATHER THAN YOURSELF...

Another major pitfall students face is focusing on others rather than themselves. Many students write their entire essay about an idol or family member, completely neglecting who they are.

Yes, it can feel strange or even difficult to talk about yourself in the first person, especially since you’re often taught to avoid “I” statements in school essays . However, this is a very different type of essay—the whole point is to give admissions officers insight into who you are!

Because of this, don’t be afraid to talk about yourself, your actions, and your thoughts.

The reason colleges give you the opportunity to write a personal essay is in the hope that you’ll reveal more about yourself. Make it crystal clear to the admissions officer what type of person you are so they can picture you, a unique individual, on their college campus.

#3: YOU RELY ON GIMMICKS...

Although you should be personable and relaxed in your essay, some people go too far and end up writing an ultra-casual biography.

This is another major mistake students make, often because they’re told by well-meaning teachers or mentors to imagine their essay as if they were talking to a friend or making a speech. This leads to poorly written essays that rarely even stay true to the prompt.

While your essay needs to be personal, it’s still being sent to a prestigious institution. You’re seeking higher education, not catching up with an old friend, so remain professional.

Fortunately, “professional” is exactly what it sounds like—intelligent, thoughtful, introspective, and respectful. There is no need to rely on jargon or even break out the thesaurus, but remember who will ultimately read your essay: a representative for the college you so badly want to attend.

#4: YOU NEVER EDITED YOUR ESSAY...

Unfortunately, this mistake is extremely common and extremely detrimental.

You spend so much time picking a college essay topic, writing the best admissions essay you can, and submitting your essay—but never stop to reread it.

It’s crucial that you edit your essay and search for any errors that might reflect poorly on your writing: grammatical or spelling mistakes, unclear sentences, slang, and poor formatting. Better yet, if you have the resources, enlist a parent, peer, teacher, or counselor to help edit your essay alongside you. Often you won’t catch your own mistakes, so having a second set of eyes can save your college application.

While this is one of the easiest mistakes to make, it’s also the easiest to fix. Simply take the extra time to ensure your essay is polished—don’t let a misplaced comma or a run on sentence be the reason you don’t get into your dream school!

#5: YOU IGNORED THE PROMPT...

Another dangerous mistake is not following the guidelines of your college essay prompt.

Oftentimes, students become so wrapped up in making their essay sound good that they forget to answer the questions colleges are asking. While this can be difficult, it’s critical that you pinpoint exactly what colleges are looking for in their prompts and then focus on that above all else .

For example, perhaps the prompt asked you what you learned from your biggest hardship, but you decide to talk about how being captain of the soccer team taught you leadership—this isn’t what the prompt is looking for and, unfortunately, this mistake can ruin your college application.

This is where getting the help of a college counselor , someone who has experience reading and interpreting college essay topics, can be a life-saver. A college counselor can help you identify exactly what your college essay prompts are asking for, how that relates to the topics you already want to write about, and how you can combine the two throughout your whole essay.

#6: YOUR ESSAY IS GENERIC...

The purpose of a personal statement is to show off who you are, so it’s crucial that you differentiate yourself in a meaningful way. You don’t want to end up writing about the same topic as everyone else, because that means admissions officers won’t remember you or your essay.

Here are some things to avoid:

• Don’t write about broad public issues that haven’t had a genuine impact on you. These will come across as generic and likely won’t say anything unique about who you are as a person.
• Avoid cliches whenever possible—they’re cheesy and ineffective. If you want to write about scoring the winning goal for your football team, make sure you have a unique spin that will stand out to admissions officers.

The key to making your essay memorable is to make it individual and to incorporate your identity. By showing college admissions officers a well-rounded picture of who you are, they’ll be far more likely to remember you and, best of all, want you at their school!

Common Requirements For College Essays

Length requirements:.

Whether you’re a student beginning the process of applying to college or a parent that wants to know more, some of the requirements for college essays don’t become available until the Common and UC Applications go live.

Fortunately, here are some requirements you can expect based on previous years:

• The Common Application’s personal statement, which goes to every college, is 650 words.
• The UC Application often includes two personal statements, 500 words each, or about two pages double spaced.
• Individual colleges will ask for supplemental essays in addition to the Common and UC Applications. These essays may range from several short answer essays, about 250-300 words, to an additional personal statement tailored to the particular college, about 650 words.
• There are often secondary essays required, depending on where you’re applying to college.

TOPIC REQUIREMENTS:

Although the specific topic requirements of college admissions essays change every year, there are a few topics that are recurring on the Common and UC Applications.

Prompts often focus on:

• Your background
• Your personal identity and how you developed it
• Major life lessons you’ve learned
• And any life-changing experiences you’ve had.

(You can find sample prompts for these topics later in the article!)

The prompts given by colleges for supplementary essays can vary drastically.

However, it’s common for schools to ask:

• Why you want to attend their college
• What kind of clubs you would join
• What you would contribute to their campus
• What your favorite book, movie, or hashtag is (the University of Southern California is known for these questions)

What Colleges Look For In An Admissions Essay

The key to writing a perfect college essay lies in capturing the reader’s attention.

Admission officers read dozens of college admissions essays daily, so yours needs to stand out. You should try to immediately hook the reader and explain why you’re the right fit for their college. Be specific about your own experience and write about what matters to you the most.

While there’s no one correct college essay format, there are characteristics of outstanding college essays . The best college essays show who you are as an individual, often recounting an experience that has deeply impacted you. These essays are thoughtful, developed, insightful, and introspective. Above all, the best college essays don’t have errors that distract from your main point.

A POWERFUL HOOK:

You should have a strong hook in the first few sentences of your college essay.

Your reader should be intrigued and want to know more, because you only have a limited amount of time to get their attention. However, many students find it easier to write their hook after they’ve already finished the essay and know their main point. Regardless of when you write your hook, double check that it’s impactful and strong before submitting your college essay.

Some effective ways of hooking a reader include:

• Setting the scene. Go into detail about what was happening in that moment. Make it vivid. If you’re a strong creative writer this can be especially effective.
• Opening with an anecdote . Nothing is more individual than your own experience. Personal anecdotes can help you capture the tone of your essay.
• Reveal a common misconception. You can give great insights into who you are by calling out a misconception that relates to part of your identity. It shows how you’re different from the very beginning of your essay.

A STRONG TOPIC:

To complement a strong hook, you need an equally strong topic.

This is your chance to appeal directly to an admissions officer, so the best topics should be closely related to your individual story. Choose something unique to your situation or life.

While you can certainly talk about more common experiences, they should always connect back to an insight into your own personality. For instance, there could be thousands of soccer players applying to the same college as you, but by showing how your experiences playing soccer shaped other aspects of your life, you can quickly differentiate yourself.

Above all, give your essay impact by highlighting your unique self.

VIVID (AND VISUAL) DETAILS:

Including in-depth descriptions and visual details not only helps show your story to your reader , but it’s also much more interesting and attention-grabbing.

Compare these two statements:

• I was a dancer in high school, but due to an injury I had to quit.
• Every day at 3:15 I would frantically put my hair into a bun on the car ride to ballet class. I was always fidgeting with excitement—ballet could never come soon enough. So when I was told my hips were giving out, my world changed. There were no more messy buns in the car, no more tired TV binges after I got home from practice, and no more fidgeting with excitement. I was told I would never dance again.

Which of these examples is more compelling?

If you’re being honest with yourself, the second one is. It tells a story using strong details that allow you to see the change this injury caused. While it’s harder to write, it’s far more effective, and can make or break your college essay’s success.

A PROFESSIONAL TONE:

Don’t use overly academic or technical language just to impress your college admissions officer, but make sure your writing is professional. You should write your essay the same way you would speak to a boss or teacher —it’ll be obvious if your essay is flooded with complicated words just for the sake of showing off, and it will ultimately detract from your main point.

While it’s important to write in a way that shows off your intelligence, don’t try to sound unnaturally academic. College admissions essays require you to strike a balance between casual and formal, with the goal being to show off your unique personality in a respectful, professional way. Your essay acts as an interview, so you want your reader to feel like they are talking to you and getting to know you through your essay.

CONCISE WRITING:

College application essays typically have a maximum word count of about 500-650 words and, once you start writing, this word count can quickly creep up on you. This means that your essay should be concise, yet detailed. As hard as that may sound, simply get to the point of your essay and you should find you have plenty of words to spare. Many students ramble on because they’re unsure what to say, and quickly run out of words as a result—while also boring their admissions officer.

Decide what you want to write about before you start writing, so you don’t fall into this trap. A clear, concise, and interesting essay will grab the admission officer’s attention, keep their attention, and show them your individual identity.

5 College Application Topics And Prompts

A crucial aspect of college essay writing is knowing what exactly you are going to write about.

While the specific prompts for each application don’t come out until early August, there are many recurring prompts that you can expect to see. Knowing what these college essay prompts will be about beforehand can help you get a head start for when topics finally release.

ESSAYS ABOUT IDENTITY:

Identity focused essay prompts will ask you specific questions about your interests and community, but will fundamentally be focused on what makes you who you are. These prompts are great if your identity is a big aspect of your life.

Here are some examples from the Common and UC Applications:

• Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story — Common Application, 2018.
• Describe the world you come from (for example, your family, community or school) and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations — UC Application, 2018.
• Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are? — UC Application, 2018.

ESSAYS ABOUT CHALLENGING THE STATUS QUO:

Another common essay prompt asks about individual experiences where you felt compelled to go against the norm. Usually the purpose of prompts like these are to show the reader that you’re independent, a leader, or have a strong set of individual values.

Here’s an example prompt:

• Reflect on a time when you challenged a belief or idea. What pushed you to act? Would you make the same decision again? — Common App, 2018.

These prompts call for you to discuss an experience that required some sort of strong action on your part. This would be particularly great is you’ve participated in a social cause or challenged a school policy.

ESSAYS ABOUT A MAJOR EXPERIENCE:

Prompts about formative experiences ask you to recount particularly life-changing events that defined who you grew into.

For example:

• Discuss an accomplishment or event, formal or informal, that marked your transition from childhood to adulthood within your culture, community, or family — Common App, 2018.

An essay based on this prompt would discuss a personal situation that had a major impact on your beliefs, identity, life-path, or actions.

ESSAYS ABOUT VOLUNTEER WORK:

Essays about volunteer work or community outreach don’t tend to use that specific wording, but rather use other language that relates to helping others or solving problems.

Here’s an example prompt that fits well with volunteer work:

• Describe a problem you’ve solved or a problem you’d like to solve. It can be an intellectual challenge, a research query, an ethical dilemma-anything that is of personal importance, no matter the scale. Explain its significance to you and what steps you took or could be taken to identify a solution — Common App, 2018.

This is a great way to not only highlight your values, but show how you’re already begun putting those values into practice. Of course, make sure your essay still relates back to you as a person. Whether it resonates with you because of a personal experience or connects to what you plan to study in college, volunteer work can be a great topic to focus on for your college essay.

ESSAYS ABOUT PAST MISTAKES:

Probably the hardest to write (and write well), essays about personal mistakes can also be a great chance to show humility and an aptitude for growth—both traits college admissions officers want to see.

• The lessons we take from failure can be fundamental to later success. Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience? — Common App, 2018.

Use these prompts as a chance to show off your maturity. While it may seem counter-intuitive to talk about a failure when trying to show off how qualified you are, remember that we all make mistakes. It’s how we handle those mistakes with grace and kindness that set us apart from others.

How To Write The Perfect College Application Essay

Now that you know what mistakes to avoid when writing your college essay and are equipped with some topics and prompts, you can begin writing your college application essay. Here’s how to write the perfect college admissions essay!

START EARLY:

One of the best things you can do for your college essay is to get a head start . If you know what prompts to expect (like the ones we discussed above) then you can work on practice essays long before the final topics are released and can begin developing ideas.

Even if you don’t have the time or energy to go that far, you should make sure to start your essay as soon as topics are officially available. You need plenty of time to think about the topics you’ll be writing about, as well as time to write multiple drafts and edit them thoroughly. This is the most important part of your college application, so give yourself as much time as possible to make sure you get into the college you want.

WRITE MULTIPLE DRAFTS:

Something as important as a college admissions essay should not be done in one shot—this essay should be something that you put a lot of time, effort, and consideration into.

This is why writing multiple drafts of your college essay is extremely important. It gives you a chance to quickly get your thoughts down, without worrying about quality, and then refine your essay from there. If you only write one draft you risk leaving out important information and failing to develop your ideas. Writing multiple drafts also gives you a chance to catch any errors that could reflect poorly on your essay.

THINK ABOUT THE QUESTION:

You need to be thoughtful in your essay.

Think carefully about the question being asked, both to ensure you answer the prompt and to show off your personality. You also want to be insightful. Your reader is trying to picture you attending their particular college, so showing your intelligent, thoughtful nature helps them see you as a thriving student in their school.

EDIT YOUR WRITING:

If you only take one thing from this article: proofread and edit!

No one writes their best work on their first try. If you leave time to reread and edit your essay you’ll think about your topic and gain new insights in the process. Most importantly, editing can transform your essay from something average to something impressive and memorable.

Of course, many students aren’t equipped to edit their own writing—especially alongside all of the other important tasks that go into submitting a college essay. It’s hard to be objective about your own work, especially if you’re feeling rushed, so make sure to seek outside help if you feel you need it.

No matter how good your essay may be, it can’t truly shine unless your writing is polished as well.

Just like we said above, you really need a second set of eyes on your essay.

When you read your own work, you often skip over mistakes because you know what you intended to write—even if that’s not what ended up on the page. You’ll miss major grammatical errors and will leave behind sentences or even whole paragraphs that simply don’t make sense to anyone but yourself. In an essay that’s only 600 words, that’s a huge amount of lost real estate.

Fortunately, there are many people out there who want to help you write the best possible college admissions essay possible:

• College-aged Siblings
• College Counselors

Of everyone on this list, college counselors are by far the best resource out there. However, keep in mind that counselors are usually swamped with requests for help come application time.

In these instances, bringing in an outside counselor can often be your best bet.

These professionals can go in-depth with you on a one-on-one basis, helping you not only polish your essay, but refine your entire application strategy. In fact, many students prefer to seek outside counselors for this very reason—a school counselor rarely has the time to work on both your application and essay together.

If you’re hoping to get into any of the top colleges in the US, you’ll want to strongly consider hiring a professional counselor to help.

Preparing For The Road Ahead

Applying to colleges is an intimidating process, but we hope these tips have helped you feel that much more prepared for the journey ahead.

Of course, this article isn’t all we have to offer.

Whether you’re a student dreaming of Yale, Standford, or Harvard, or a parent looking to support your kid however you can, we’re here to help. WeAdmit is a team of college counseling professionals who intimately understand the admissions process. Whether you’re struggling to write the perfect essay or aren’t even sure where to apply yet, we can work with you one-on-one to refine your application strategy and support you through the many twists and turns of applying to college.

Are You Ready? Let’s Get Into College!

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Extracurriculars.

16 Strong College Essay Examples from Top Schools

What’s Covered:

• Common App Essays
• Why This College Essays
• Why This Major Essays
• Extracurricular Essays
• Overcoming Challenges Essays
• Community Service Essays
• Diversity Essays
• Political/Global Issues Essays
• Where to Get Feedback on Your Essays

Most high school students don’t get a lot of experience with creative writing, so the college essay can be especially daunting. Reading examples of successful essays, however, can help you understand what admissions officers are looking for.

In this post, we’ll share 16 college essay examples of many different topics. Most of the essay prompts fall into 8 different archetypes, and you can approach each prompt under that archetype in a similar way. We’ve grouped these examples by archetype so you can better structure your approach to college essays.

If you’re looking for school-specific guides, check out our 2022-2023 essay breakdowns .

Looking at examples of real essays students have submitted to colleges can be very beneficial to get inspiration for your essays. You should never copy or plagiarize from these examples when writing your own essays. Colleges can tell when an essay isn’t genuine and will not view students favorably if they plagiarized. 

Note: the essays are titled in this post for navigation purposes, but they were not originally titled. We also include the original prompt where possible.

The Common App essay goes to all of the schools on your list, unless those schools use a separate application platform. Because of this, it’s the most important essay in your portfolio, and likely the longest essay you’ll need to write (you get up to 650 words). 

The goal of this essay is to share a glimpse into who you are, what matters to you, and what you hope to achieve. It’s a chance to share your story. 

Learn more about how to write the Common App essay in our complete guide.

The Multiple Meanings of Point

Prompt: Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story. (250-650 words)

Night had robbed the academy of its daytime colors, yet there was comfort in the dim lights that cast shadows of our advances against the bare studio walls. Silhouettes of roundhouse kicks, spin crescent kicks, uppercuts and the occasional butterfly kick danced while we sparred. She approached me, eyes narrowed with the trace of a smirk challenging me. “Ready spar!” Her arm began an upward trajectory targeting my shoulder, a common first move. I sidestepped — only to almost collide with another flying fist. Pivoting my right foot, I snapped my left leg, aiming my heel at her midsection. The center judge raised one finger. 

There was no time to celebrate, not in the traditional sense at least. Master Pollard gave a brief command greeted with a unanimous “Yes, sir” and the thud of 20 hands dropping-down-and-giving-him-30, while the “winners” celebrated their victory with laps as usual. 

Three years ago, seven-thirty in the evening meant I was a warrior. It meant standing up straighter, pushing a little harder, “Yes, sir” and “Yes, ma’am”, celebrating birthdays by breaking boards, never pointing your toes, and familiarity. Three years later, seven-thirty in the morning meant I was nervous. 

The room is uncomfortably large. The sprung floor soaks up the checkerboard of sunlight piercing through the colonial windows. The mirrored walls further illuminate the studio and I feel the light scrutinizing my sorry attempts at a pas de bourrée, while capturing the organic fluidity of the dancers around me. “Chassé en croix, grand battement, pique, pirouette.” I follow the graceful limbs of the woman in front of me, her legs floating ribbons, as she executes what seems to be a perfect ronds de jambes. Each movement remains a negotiation. With admirable patience, Ms. Tan casts me a sympathetic glance.   

There is no time to wallow in the misery that is my right foot. Taekwondo calls for dorsiflexion; pointed toes are synonymous with broken toes. My thoughts drag me into a flashback of the usual response to this painful mistake: “You might as well grab a tutu and head to the ballet studio next door.” Well, here I am Master Pollard, unfortunately still following your orders to never point my toes, but no longer feeling the satisfaction that comes with being a third degree black belt with 5 years of experience quite literally under her belt. It’s like being a white belt again — just in a leotard and ballet slippers. 

But the appetite for new beginnings that brought me here doesn’t falter. It is only reinforced by the classical rendition of “Dancing Queen” that floods the room and the ghost of familiarity that reassures me that this new beginning does not and will not erase the past. After years spent at the top, it’s hard to start over. But surrendering what you are only leads you to what you may become. In Taekwondo, we started each class reciting the tenets: honor, courtesy, integrity, perseverance, self-control, courage, humility, and knowledge, and I have never felt that I embodied those traits more so than when I started ballet. 

The thing about change is that it eventually stops making things so different. After nine different schools, four different countries, three different continents, fluency in Tamil, Norwegian, and English, there are more blurred lines than there are clear fragments. My life has not been a tactfully executed, gold medal-worthy Taekwondo form with each movement defined, nor has it been a series of frappés performed by a prima ballerina with each extension identical and precise, but thankfully it has been like the dynamics of a spinning back kick, fluid, and like my chances of landing a pirouette, unpredictable. 

The first obvious strength of this essay is the introduction—it is interesting and snappy and uses enough technical language that we want to figure out what the student is discussing. When writing introductions, students tend to walk the line between intriguing and confusing. It is important that your essay ends up on the intentionally intriguing side of that line—like this student does! We are a little confused at first, but by then introducing the idea of “sparring,” the student grounds their essay.

People often advise young writers to “show, not tell.” This student takes that advice a step further and makes the reader do a bit of work to figure out what they are telling us. Nowhere in this essay does it say “After years of Taekwondo, I made the difficult decision to switch over to ballet.” Rather, the student says “It’s like being a white belt again — just in a leotard and ballet slippers.” How powerful! 

After a lot of emotional language and imagery, this student finishes off their essay with very valuable (and necessary!) reflection. They show admissions officers that they are more than just a good writer—they are a mature and self-aware individual who would be beneficial to a college campus. Self-awareness comes through with statements like “surrendering what you are only leads you to what you may become” and maturity can be seen through the student’s discussion of values: “honor, courtesy, integrity, perseverance, self-control, courage, humility, and knowledge, and I have never felt that I embodied those traits more so than when I started ballet.”

Sparking Self-Awareness

Prompt: The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience? (250-650 words)

Was I no longer the beloved daughter of nature, whisperer of trees? Knee-high rubber boots, camouflage, bug spray—I wore the garb and perfume of a proud wild woman, yet there I was, hunched over the pathetic pile of stubborn sticks, utterly stumped, on the verge of tears. As a child, I had considered myself a kind of rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees, who could glide through tick-infested meadows and emerge Lyme-free. I knew the cracks of the earth like the scars on my own rough palms. Yet here I was, ten years later, incapable of performing the most fundamental outdoor task: I could not, for the life of me, start a fire. 

Furiously I rubbed the twigs together—rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers. No smoke. The twigs were too young, too sticky-green; I tossed them away with a shower of curses, and began tearing through the underbrush in search of a more flammable collection. My efforts were fruitless. Livid, I bit a rejected twig, determined to prove that the forest had spurned me, offering only young, wet bones that would never burn. But the wood cracked like carrots between my teeth—old, brittle, and bitter. Roaring and nursing my aching palms, I retreated to the tent, where I sulked and awaited the jeers of my family. 

Rattling their empty worm cans and reeking of fat fish, my brother and cousins swaggered into the campsite. Immediately, they noticed the minor stick massacre by the fire pit and called to me, their deep voices already sharp with contempt. 

“Where’s the fire, Princess Clara?” they taunted. “Having some trouble?” They prodded me with the ends of the chewed branches and, with a few effortless scrapes of wood on rock, sparked a red and roaring flame. My face burned long after I left the fire pit. The camp stank of salmon and shame. 

In the tent, I pondered my failure. Was I so dainty? Was I that incapable? I thought of my hands, how calloused and capable they had been, how tender and smooth they had become. It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive. And I’d gotten glasses, having grown horrifically nearsighted; long nights of dim lighting and thick books had done this. I couldn’t remember the last time I had lain down on a hill, barefaced, and seen the stars without having to squint. Crawling along the edge of the tent, a spider confirmed my transformation—he disgusted me, and I felt an overwhelming urge to squash him. 

Yet, I realized I hadn’t really changed—I had only shifted perspective. I still eagerly explored new worlds, but through poems and prose rather than pastures and puddles. I’d grown to prefer the boom of a bass over that of a bullfrog, learned to coax a different kind of fire from wood, having developed a burn for writing rhymes and scrawling hypotheses. 

That night, I stayed up late with my journal and wrote about the spider I had decided not to kill. I had tolerated him just barely, only shrieking when he jumped—it helped to watch him decorate the corners of the tent with his delicate webs, knowing that he couldn’t start fires, either. When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.

First things first, this Common App essay is well-written. This student is definitely showing the admissions officers her ability to articulate her points beautifully and creatively. It starts with vivid images like that of the “rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees, who could glide through tick-infested meadows and emerge Lyme-free.” And because the prose is flowery (and beautiful!), the writer can get away with metaphors like “I knew the cracks of the earth like the scars on my own rough palms” that might sound cheesy without the clear command of the English language that the writer quickly establishes.

In addition to being well-written, this essay is thematically cohesive. It begins with the simple introduction “Fire!” and ends with the following image: “When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.” This full-circle approach leaves readers satisfied and impressed.

While dialogue often comes off as cliche or trite, this student effectively incorporates her family members saying “Where’s the fire, Princess Clara?” This is achieved through the apt use of the verb “taunted” to characterize the questioning and through the question’s thematic connection to the earlier image of the student as a rustic princess. Similarly, rhetorical questions can feel randomly placed in essays, but this student’s inclusion of the questions “Was I so dainty?” and “Was I that incapable?” feel perfectly justified after she establishes that she was pondering her failure.

Quite simply, this essay shows how quality writing can make a simple story outstandingly compelling. 

Why This College?

“Why This College?” is one of the most common essay prompts, likely because schools want to understand whether you’d be a good fit and how you’d use their resources.

This essay is one of the more straightforward ones you’ll write for college applications, but you still can and should allow your voice to shine through.

Learn more about how to write the “Why This College?” essay in our guide.

Prompt: How will you explore your intellectual and academic interests at the University of Pennsylvania? Please answer this question given the specific undergraduate school to which you are applying (650 words).

Sister Simone Roach, a theorist of nursing ethics, said, “caring is the human mode of being.” I have long been inspired by Sister Roach’s Five C’s of Caring: commitment, conscience, competence, compassion, and confidence. Penn both embraces and fosters these values through a rigorous, interdisciplinary curriculum and unmatched access to service and volunteer opportunities.

COMMITMENT. Reading through the activities that Penn Quakers devote their time to (in addition to academics!) felt like drinking from a firehose in the best possible way. As a prospective nursing student with interests outside of my major, I value this level of flexibility. I plan to leverage Penn’s liberal arts curriculum to gain an in-depth understanding of the challenges LGBT people face, especially regarding healthcare access. Through courses like “Interactional Processes with LGBT Individuals” and volunteering at the Mazzoni Center for outreach, I hope to learn how to better support the Penn LGBT community as well as my family and friends, including my cousin, who came out as trans last year.

CONSCIENCE. As one of the first people in my family to attend a four-year university, I wanted a school that promoted a sense of moral responsibility among its students. At Penn, professors challenge their students to question and recreate their own set of morals by sparking thought- provoking, open-minded discussions. I can imagine myself advocating for universal healthcare in courses such as “Health Care Reform & Future of American Health System” and debating its merits with my peers. Studying in an environment where students confidently voice their opinions – conservative or liberal – will push me to question and strengthen my value system.

COMPETENCE. Two aspects that drew my attention to Penn’s BSN program were its high-quality research opportunities and hands-on nursing projects. Through its Office of Nursing Research, Penn connects students to faculty members who share similar research interests. As I volunteered at a nursing home in high school, I hope to work with Dr. Carthon to improve the quality of care for senior citizens. Seniors, especially minorities, face serious barriers to healthcare that I want to resolve. Additionally, Penn’s unique use of simulations to bridge the gap between classroom learning and real-world application impressed me. Using computerized manikins that mimic human responses, classes in Penn’s nursing program allow students to apply their emergency medical skills in a mass casualty simulation and monitor their actions afterward through a video system. Participating in this activity will help me identify my strengths and areas for improvement regarding crisis management and medical care in a controlled yet realistic setting. Research opportunities and simulations will develop my skills even before I interact with patients.

COMPASSION. I value giving back through community service, and I have a particular interest in Penn’s Community Champions and Nursing Students For Sexual & Reproductive Health (NSRH). As a four-year volunteer health educator, I hope to continue this work as a Community Champions member. I am excited to collaborate with medical students to teach fourth and fifth graders in the city about cardiology or lead a chair dance class for the elders at the LIFE Center. Furthermore, as a feminist who firmly believes in women’s abortion rights, I’d like to join NSRH in order to advocate for women’s health on campus. At Penn, I can work with like-minded people to make a meaningful difference.

CONFIDENCE. All of the Quakers that I have met possess one defining trait: confidence. Each student summarized their experiences at Penn as challenging but fulfilling. Although I expect my coursework to push me, from my conversations with current Quakers I know it will help me to be far more effective in my career.

The Five C’s of Caring are important heuristics for nursing, but they also provide insight into how I want to approach my time in college. I am eager to engage with these principles both as a nurse and as a Penn Quaker, and I can’t wait to start.

This prompt from Penn asks students to tailor their answer to their specific field of study. One great thing that this student does is identify their undergraduate school early, by mentioning “Sister Simone Roach, a theorist of nursing ethics.” You don’t want readers confused or searching through other parts of your application to figure out your major.

With a longer essay like this, it is important to establish structure. Some students organize their essay in a narrative form, using an anecdote from their past or predicting their future at a school. This student uses Roach’s 5 C’s of Caring as a framing device that organizes their essay around values. This works well!

While this essay occasionally loses voice, there are distinct moments where the student’s personality shines through. We see this with phrases like “felt like drinking from a fire hose in the best possible way” and “All of the Quakers that I have met possess one defining trait: confidence.” It is important to show off your personality to make your essay stand out. 

Finally, this student does a great job of referencing specific resources about Penn. It’s clear that they have done their research (they’ve even talked to current Quakers). They have dreams and ambitions that can only exist at Penn.

Prompt: What is it about Yale that has led you to apply? (125 words or fewer)

Coin collector and swimmer. Hungarian and Romanian. Critical and creative thinker. I was drawn to Yale because they don’t limit one’s mind with “or” but rather embrace unison with “and.” 

Wandering through the Beinecke Library, I prepare for my multidisciplinary Energy Studies capstone about the correlation between hedonism and climate change, making it my goal to find implications in environmental sociology. Under the tutelage of Assistant Professor Arielle Baskin-Sommers, I explore the emotional deficits of depression, utilizing neuroimaging to scrutinize my favorite branch of psychology: human perception. At Walden Peer Counseling, I integrate my peer support and active listening skills to foster an empathetic environment for the Yale community. Combining my interests in psychological and environmental studies is why I’m proud to be a Bulldog. 

This answer to the “Why This College” question is great because 1) the student shows their excitement about attending Yale 2) we learn the ways in which attending Yale will help them achieve their goals and 3) we learn their interests and identities.

In this response, you can find a prime example of the “Image of the Future” approach, as the student flashes forward and envisions their life at Yale, using present tense (“I explore,” “I integrate,” “I’m proud”). This approach is valuable if you are trying to emphasize your dedication to a specific school. Readers get the feeling that this student is constantly imagining themselves on campus—it feels like Yale really matters to them.

Starting this image with the Beinecke Library is great because the Beinecke Library only exists at Yale. It is important to tailor “Why This College” responses to each specific school. This student references a program of study, a professor, and an extracurricular that only exist at Yale. Additionally, they connect these unique resources to their interests—psychological and environmental studies.

Finally, we learn about the student (independent of academics) through this response. By the end of their 125 words, we know their hobbies, ethnicities, and social desires, in addition to their academic interests. It can be hard to tackle a 125-word response, but this student shows that it’s possible.

Why This Major?

The goal of this prompt is to understand how you came to be interested in your major and what you plan to do with it. For competitive programs like engineering, this essay helps admissions officers distinguish students who have a genuine passion and are most likely to succeed in the program. This is another more straightforward essay, but you do have a bit more freedom to include relevant anecdotes.

Learn more about how to write the “Why This Major?” essay in our guide.

Why Duke Engineering

Prompt: If you are applying to the Pratt School of Engineering as a first year applicant, please discuss why you want to study engineering and why you would like to study at Duke (250 words).

One Christmas morning, when I was nine, I opened a snap circuit set from my grandmother. Although I had always loved math and science, I didn’t realize my passion for engineering until I spent the rest of winter break creating different circuits to power various lights, alarms, and sensors. Even after I outgrew the toy, I kept the set in my bedroom at home and knew I wanted to study engineering. Later, in a high school biology class, I learned that engineering didn’t only apply to circuits, but also to medical devices that could improve people’s quality of life. Biomedical engineering allows me to pursue my academic passions and help people at the same time.

Just as biology and engineering interact in biomedical engineering, I am fascinated by interdisciplinary research in my chosen career path. Duke offers unmatched resources, such as DUhatch and The Foundry, that will enrich my engineering education and help me practice creative problem-solving skills. The emphasis on entrepreneurship within these resources will also help me to make a helpful product. Duke’s Bass Connections program also interests me; I firmly believe that the most creative and necessary problem-solving comes by bringing people together from different backgrounds. Through this program, I can use my engineering education to solve complicated societal problems such as creating sustainable surgical tools for low-income countries. Along the way, I can learn alongside experts in the field. Duke’s openness and collaborative culture span across its academic disciplines, making Duke the best place for me to grow both as an engineer and as a social advocate.

This prompt calls for a complex answer. Students must explain both why they want to study engineering and why Duke is the best place for them to study engineering.

This student begins with a nice hook—a simple anecdote about a simple present with profound consequences. They do not fluff up their anecdote with flowery images or emotionally-loaded language; it is what it is, and it is compelling and sweet. As their response continues, they express a particular interest in problem-solving. They position problem-solving as a fundamental part of their interest in engineering (and a fundamental part of their fascination with their childhood toy). This helps readers to learn about the student!

Problem-solving is also the avenue by which they introduce Duke’s resources—DUhatch, The Foundry, and Duke’s Bass Connections program. It is important to notice that the student explains how these resources can help them achieve their future goals—it is not enough to simply identify the resources!

This response is interesting and focused. It clearly answers the prompt, and it feels honest and authentic.

Why Georgia Tech CompSci

Prompt: Why do you want to study your chosen major specifically at Georgia Tech? (300 words max)

I held my breath and hit RUN. Yes! A plump white cat jumped out and began to catch the falling pizzas. Although my Fat Cat project seems simple now, it was the beginning of an enthusiastic passion for computer science. Four years and thousands of hours of programming later, that passion has grown into an intense desire to explore how computer science can serve society. Every day, surrounded by technology that can recognize my face and recommend scarily-specific ads, I’m reminded of Uncle Ben’s advice to a young Spiderman: “with great power comes great responsibility”. Likewise, the need to ensure digital equality has skyrocketed with AI’s far-reaching presence in society; and I believe that digital fairness starts with equality in education.

The unique use of threads at the College of Computing perfectly matches my interests in AI and its potential use in education; the path of combined threads on Intelligence and People gives me the rare opportunity to delve deep into both areas. I’m particularly intrigued by the rich sets of both knowledge-based and data-driven intelligence courses, as I believe AI should not only show correlation of events, but also provide insight for why they occur.

In my four years as an enthusiastic online English tutor, I’ve worked hard to help students overcome both financial and technological obstacles in hopes of bringing quality education to people from diverse backgrounds. For this reason, I’m extremely excited by the many courses in the People thread that focus on education and human-centered technology. I’d love to explore how to integrate AI technology into the teaching process to make education more available, affordable, and effective for people everywhere. And with the innumerable opportunities that Georgia Tech has to offer, I know that I will be able to go further here than anywhere else.

With a “Why This Major” essay, you want to avoid using all of your words to tell a story. That being said, stories are a great way to show your personality and make your essay stand out. This student’s story takes up only their first 21 words, but it positions the student as fun and funny and provides an endearing image of cats and pizzas—who doesn’t love cats and pizzas? There are other moments when the student’s personality shines through also, like the Spiderman reference.

While this pop culture reference adds color, it also is important for what the student is getting at: their passion. They want to go into computer science to address the issues of security and equity that are on the industry’s mind, and they acknowledge these concerns with their comments about “scarily-specific ads” and their statement that “the need to ensure digital equality has skyrocketed.” This student is self-aware and aware of the state of the industry. This aptitude will be appealing for admissions officers.

The conversation around “threads” is essential for this student’s response because the prompt asks specifically about the major at Georgia Tech and it is the only thing they reference that is specific to Georgia Tech. Threads are great, but this student would have benefitted from expanding on other opportunities specific to Georgia Tech later in the essay, instead of simply inserting “innumerable opportunities.”

Overall, this student shows personality, passion, and aptitude—precisely what admissions officers want to see!

Extracurricular Essay

You’re asked to describe your activities on the Common App, but chances are, you have at least one extracurricular that’s impacted you in a way you can’t explain in 150 characters.

This essay archetype allows you to share how your most important activity shaped you and how you might use those lessons learned in the future. You are definitely welcome to share anecdotes and use a narrative approach, but remember to include some reflection. A common mistake students make is to only describe the activity without sharing how it impacted them.

Learn more about how to write the Extracurricular Essay in our guide.

A Dedicated Musician

My fingers raced across the keys, rapidly striking one after another. My body swayed with the music as my hands raced across the piano. Crashing onto the final chord, it was over as quickly as it had begun. My shoulders relaxed and I couldn’t help but break into a satisfied grin. I had just played the Moonlight Sonata’s third movement, a longtime dream of mine. 

Four short months ago, though, I had considered it impossible. The piece’s tempo was impossibly fast, its notes stretching between each end of the piano, forcing me to reach farther than I had ever dared. It was 17 pages of the most fragile and intricate melodies I had ever encountered. 

But that summer, I found myself ready to take on the challenge. With the end of the school year, I was released from my commitment to practicing for band and solo performances. I was now free to determine my own musical path: either succeed in learning the piece, or let it defeat me for the third summer in a row. 

Over those few months, I spent countless hours practicing the same notes until they burned a permanent place in my memory, creating a soundtrack for even my dreams. Some would say I’ve mastered the piece, but as a musician I know better. Now that I can play it, I am eager to take the next step and add in layers of musicality and expression to make the once-impossible piece even more beautiful.

In this response, the student uses their extracurricular, piano, as a way to emphasize their positive qualities. At the beginning, readers are invited on a journey with the student where we feel their struggle, their intensity, and ultimately their satisfaction. With this descriptive image, we form a valuable connection with the student.

Then, we get to learn about what makes this student special: their dedication and work ethic. The fact that this student describes their desire to be productive during the summer shows an intensity that is appealing to admissions officers. Additionally, the growth mindset that this student emphasizes in their conclusion is appealing to admissions officers.

The Extracurricular Essay can be seen as an opportunity to characterize yourself. This student clearly identified their positive qualities, then used the Extracurricular Essay as a way to articulate them.

A Complicated Relationship with the School Newspaper

My school’s newspaper and I have a typical love-hate relationship; some days I want nothing more than to pass two hours writing and formatting articles, while on others the mere thought of student journalism makes me shiver. Still, as we’re entering our fourth year together, you could consider us relatively stable. We’ve learned to accept each other’s differences; at this point I’ve become comfortable spending an entire Friday night preparing for an upcoming issue, and I hardly even notice the snail-like speed of our computers. I’ve even benefitted from the polygamous nature of our relationship—with twelve other editors, there’s a lot of cooperation involved. Perverse as it may be, from that teamwork I’ve both gained some of my closest friends and improved my organizational and time-management skills. And though leaving it in the hands of new editors next year will be difficult, I know our time together has only better prepared me for future relationships.

This response is great. It’s cute and endearing and, importantly, tells readers a lot about the student who wrote it. Framing this essay in the context of a “love-hate relationship,” then supplementing with comments like “We’ve learned to accept each other’s differences” allows this student to advertise their maturity in a unique and engaging way. 

While Extracurricular Essays can be a place to show how you’ve grown within an activity, they can also be a place to show how you’ve grown through an activity. At the end of this essay, readers think that this student is mature and enjoyable, and we think that their experience with the school newspaper helped make them that way.

Participating in Democracy

Prompt: Research shows that an ability to learn from experiences outside the classroom correlates with success in college. What was your greatest learning experience over the past 4 years that took place outside of the traditional classroom? (250 words) 

The cool, white halls of the Rayburn House office building contrasted with the bustling energy of interns entertaining tourists, staffers rushing to cover committee meetings, and my fellow conference attendees separating to meet with our respective congresspeople. Through civics and US history classes, I had learned about our government, but simply hearing the legislative process outlined didn’t prepare me to navigate it. It was my first political conference, and, after learning about congressional mechanics during breakout sessions, I was lobbying my representative about an upcoming vote crucial to the US-Middle East relationship. As the daughter of Iranian immigrants, my whole life had led me to the moment when I could speak on behalf of the family members who had not emigrated with my parents.

As I sat down with my congresswoman’s chief of staff, I truly felt like a participant in democracy; I was exercising my right to be heard as a young American. Through this educational conference, I developed a plan of action to raise my voice. When I returned home, I signed up to volunteer with the state chapter of the Democratic Party. I sponsored letter-writing campaigns, canvassed for local elections, and even pursued an internship with a state senate campaign. I know that I don’t need to be old enough to vote to effect change. Most importantly, I also know that I want to study government—I want to make a difference for my communities in the United States and the Middle East throughout my career. 

While this prompt is about extracurricular activities, it specifically references the idea that the extracurricular should support the curricular. It is focused on experiential learning for future career success. This student wants to study government, so they chose to describe an experience of hands-on learning within their field—an apt choice!

As this student discusses their extracurricular experience, they also clue readers into their future goals—they want to help Middle Eastern communities. Admissions officers love when students mention concrete plans with a solid foundation. Here, the foundation comes from this student’s ethnicity. With lines like “my whole life had led me to the moment when I could speak on behalf of the family members who had not emigrated with my parents,” the student assures admissions officers of their emotional connection to their future field.

The strength of this essay comes from its connections. It connects the student’s extracurricular activity to their studies and connects theirs studies to their personal history.

Overcoming Challenges

You’re going to face a lot of setbacks in college, so admissions officers want to make you’re you have the resilience and resolve to overcome them. This essay is your chance to be vulnerable and connect to admissions officers on an emotional level.

Learn more about how to write the Overcoming Challenges Essay in our guide.

The Student Becomes the Master

”Advanced females ages 13 to 14 please proceed to staging with your coaches at this time.” Skittering around the room, eyes wide and pleading, I frantically explained my situation to nearby coaches. The seconds ticked away in my head; every polite refusal increased my desperation.

Despair weighed me down. I sank to my knees as a stream of competitors, coaches, and officials flowed around me. My dojang had no coach, and the tournament rules prohibited me from competing without one.

Although I wanted to remain strong, doubts began to cloud my mind. I could not help wondering: what was the point of perfecting my skills if I would never even compete? The other members of my team, who had found coaches minutes earlier, attempted to comfort me, but I barely heard their words. They couldn’t understand my despair at being left on the outside, and I never wanted them to understand.

Since my first lesson 12 years ago, the members of my dojang have become family. I have watched them grow up, finding my own happiness in theirs. Together, we have honed our kicks, blocks, and strikes. We have pushed one another to aim higher and become better martial artists. Although my dojang had searched for a reliable coach for years, we had not found one. When we attended competitions in the past, my teammates and I had always gotten lucky and found a sympathetic coach. Now, I knew this practice was unsustainable. It would devastate me to see the other members of my dojang in my situation, unable to compete and losing hope as a result. My dojang needed a coach, and I decided it was up to me to find one. 

I first approached the adults in the dojang – both instructors and members’ parents. However, these attempts only reacquainted me with polite refusals. Everyone I asked told me they couldn’t devote multiple weekends per year to competitions. I soon realized that I would have become the coach myself.

At first, the inner workings of tournaments were a mystery to me. To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side. I learned everything from motivational strategies to technical, behind-the-scenes components of Taekwondo competitions. Though I emerged with new knowledge and confidence in my capabilities, others did not share this faith.

Parents threw me disbelieving looks when they learned that their children’s coach was only a child herself. My self-confidence was my armor, deflecting their surly glances. Every armor is penetrable, however, and as the relentless barrage of doubts pounded my resilience, it began to wear down. I grew unsure of my own abilities.

Despite the attack, I refused to give up. When I saw the shining eyes of the youngest students preparing for their first competition, I knew I couldn’t let them down. To quit would be to set them up to be barred from competing like I was. The knowledge that I could solve my dojang’s longtime problem motivated me to overcome my apprehension.

Now that my dojang flourishes at competitions, the attacks on me have weakened, but not ended. I may never win the approval of every parent; at times, I am still tormented by doubts, but I find solace in the fact that members of my dojang now only worry about competing to the best of their abilities.

Now, as I arrive at a tournament with my students, I close my eyes and remember the past. I visualize the frantic search for a coach and the chaos amongst my teammates as we competed with one another to find coaches before the staging calls for our respective divisions. I open my eyes to the exact opposite scene. Lacking a coach hurt my ability to compete, but I am proud to know that no member of my dojang will have to face that problem again.

This essay is great because it has a strong introduction and conclusion. The introduction is notably suspenseful and draws readers into the story. Because we know it is a college essay, we can assume that the student is one of the competitors, but at the same time, this introduction feels intentionally ambiguous as if the writer could be a competitor, a coach, a sibling of a competitor, or anyone else in the situation.

As we continue reading the essay, we learn that the writer is, in fact, the competitor. Readers also learn a lot about the student’s values as we hear their thoughts: “I knew I couldn’t let them down. To quit would be to set them up to be barred from competing like I was.” Ultimately, the conflict and inner and outer turmoil is resolved through the “Same, but Different” ending technique as the student places themself in the same environment that we saw in the intro, but experiencing it differently due to their actions throughout the narrative. This is a very compelling strategy!

Growing Sensitivity to Struggles

Prompt: The lessons we take from failure can be fundamental to later success. Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience? (650 words)

“You ruined my life!” After months of quiet anger, my brother finally confronted me. To my shame, I had been appallingly ignorant of his pain.

Despite being twins, Max and I are profoundly different. Having intellectual interests from a young age that, well, interested very few of my peers, I often felt out of step in comparison with my highly-social brother. Everything appeared to come effortlessly for Max and, while we share an extremely tight bond, his frequent time away with friends left me feeling more and more alone as we grew older.

When my parents learned about The Green Academy, we hoped it would be an opportunity for me to find not only an academically challenging environment, but also – perhaps more importantly – a community. This meant transferring the family from Drumfield to Kingston. And while there was concern about Max, we all believed that given his sociable nature, moving would be far less impactful on him than staying put might be on me.

As it turned out, Green Academy was everything I’d hoped for. I was ecstatic to discover a group of students with whom I shared interests and could truly engage. Preoccupied with new friends and a rigorous course load, I failed to notice that the tables had turned. Max, lost in the fray and grappling with how to make connections in his enormous new high school, had become withdrawn and lonely. It took me until Christmas time – and a massive argument – to recognize how difficult the transition had been for my brother, let alone that he blamed me for it.

Through my own journey of searching for academic peers, in addition to coming out as gay when I was 12, I had developed deep empathy for those who had trouble fitting in. It was a pain I knew well and could easily relate to. Yet after Max’s outburst, my first response was to protest that our parents – not I – had chosen to move us here. In my heart, though, I knew that regardless of who had made the decision, we ended up in Kingston for my benefit. I was ashamed that, while I saw myself as genuinely compassionate, I had been oblivious to the heartache of the person closest to me. I could no longer ignore it – and I didn’t want to.

We stayed up half the night talking, and the conversation took an unexpected turn. Max opened up and shared that it wasn’t just about the move. He told me how challenging school had always been for him, due to his dyslexia, and that the ever-present comparison to me had only deepened his pain.

We had been in parallel battles the whole time and, yet, I only saw that Max was in distress once he experienced problems with which I directly identified. I’d long thought Max had it so easy – all because he had friends. The truth was, he didn’t need to experience my personal brand of sorrow in order for me to relate – he had felt plenty of his own.

My failure to recognize Max’s suffering brought home for me the profound universality and diversity of personal struggle; everyone has insecurities, everyone has woes, and everyone – most certainly – has pain. I am acutely grateful for the conversations he and I shared around all of this, because I believe our relationship has been fundamentally strengthened by a deeper understanding of one another. Further, this experience has reinforced the value of constantly striving for deeper sensitivity to the hidden struggles of those around me. I won’t make the mistake again of assuming that the surface of someone’s life reflects their underlying story.

Here you can find a prime example that you don’t have to have fabulous imagery or flowery prose to write a successful essay. You just have to be clear and say something that matters. This essay is simple and beautiful. It almost feels like having a conversation with a friend and learning that they are an even better person than you already thought they were.

Through this narrative, readers learn a lot about the writer—where they’re from, what their family life is like, what their challenges were as a kid, and even their sexuality. We also learn a lot about their values—notably, the value they place on awareness, improvement, and consideration of others. Though they never explicitly state it (which is great because it is still crystal clear!), this student’s ending of “I won’t make the mistake again of assuming that the surface of someone’s life reflects their underlying story” shows that they are constantly striving for improvement and finding lessons anywhere they can get them in life.

Community Service/Impact on the Community

Colleges want students who will positively impact the campus community and go on to make change in the world after they graduate. This essay is similar to the Extracurricular Essay, but you need to focus on a situation where you impacted others. 

Learn more about how to write the Community Service Essay in our guide.

Academic Signing Day

Prompt: What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?

The scent of eucalyptus caressed my nose in a gentle breeze. Spring had arrived. Senior class activities were here. As a sophomore, I noticed a difference between athletic and academic seniors at my high school; one received recognition while the other received silence. I wanted to create an event celebrating students academically-committed to four-years, community colleges, trades schools, and military programs. This event was Academic Signing Day.

The leadership label, “Events Coordinator,” felt heavy on my introverted mind. I usually was setting up for rallies and spirit weeks, being overlooked around the exuberant nature of my peers. 

I knew a change of mind was needed; I designed flyers, painted posters, presented powerpoints, created student-led committees, and practiced countless hours for my introductory speech. Each committee would play a vital role on event day: one dedicated to refreshments, another to technology, and one for decorations. The fourth-month planning was a laborious joy, but I was still fearful of being in the spotlight. Being acknowledged by hundreds of people was new to me.     

The day was here. Parents filled the stands of the multi-purpose room. The atmosphere was tense; I could feel the angst building in my throat, worried about the impression I would leave. Applause followed each of the 400 students as they walked to their college table, indicating my time to speak. 

I walked up to the stand, hands clammy, expression tranquil, my words echoing to the audience. I thought my speech would be met by the sounds of crickets; instead, smiles lit up the stands, realizing my voice shone through my actions. I was finally coming out of my shell. The floor was met by confetti as I was met by the sincerity of staff, students, and parents, solidifying the event for years to come. 

Academic students were no longer overshadowed. Their accomplishments were equally recognized to their athletic counterparts. The school culture of athletics over academics was no longer imbalanced. Now, every time I smell eucalyptus, it is a friendly reminder that on Academic Signing Day, not only were academic students in the spotlight but so was my voice.

This essay answers the prompt nicely because the student describes a contribution with a lasting legacy. Academic Signing Day will affect this high school in the future and it affected this student’s self-development—an idea summed up nicely with their last phrase “not only were academic students in the spotlight but so was my voice.”

With Community Service essays, students sometimes take small contributions and stretch them. And, oftentimes, the stretch is very obvious. Here, the student shows us that Academic Signing Day actually mattered by mentioning four months of planning and hundreds of students and parents. They also make their involvement in Academic Signing Day clear—it was their idea and they were in charge, and that’s why they gave the introductory speech.

Use this response as an example of the type of focused contribution that makes for a convincing Community Service Essay.

Climate Change Rally

Prompt: What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time? (technically not community service, but the response works)

Let’s fast-forward time. Strides were made toward racial equality. Healthcare is accessible to all; however, one issue remains. Our aquatic ecosystems are parched with dead coral from ocean acidification. Climate change has prevailed.

Rewind to the present day.

My activism skills are how I express my concerns for the environment. Whether I play on sandy beaches or rest under forest treetops, nature offers me an escape from the haste of the world. When my body is met by trash in the ocean or my nose is met by harmful pollutants, Earth’s pain becomes my own. 

Substituting coffee grinds as fertilizer, using bamboo straws, starting my sustainable garden, my individual actions needed to reach a larger scale. I often found performative activism to be ineffective when communicating climate concerns. My days of reposting awareness graphics on social media never filled the ambition I had left to put my activism skills to greater use. I decided to share my ecocentric worldview with a coalition of environmentalists and host a climate change rally outside my high school.

Meetings were scheduled where I informed students about the unseen impact they have on the oceans and local habitual communities. My fingers were cramped from all the constant typing and investigating of micro causes of the Pacific Waste Patch, creating reusable flyers, displaying steps people could take from home in reducing their carbon footprint. I aided my fellow environmentalists in translating these flyers into other languages, repeating this process hourly, for five days, up until rally day.  

It was 7:00 AM. The faces of 100 students were shouting, “The climate is changing, why can’t we?” I proudly walked on the dewy grass, grabbing the microphone, repeating those same words. The rally not only taught me efficient methods of communication but it echoed my environmental activism to the masses. The City of Corona would be the first of many cities to see my activism, as more rallies were planned for various parts of SoCal. My once unfulfilled ambition was fueled by my tangible activism, understanding that it takes more than one person to make an environmental impact.

Like with the last example, this student describes a focused event with a lasting legacy. That’s a perfect place to start! By the end of this essay, we have an image of the cause of this student’s passion and the effect of this student’s passion. There are no unanswered questions.

This student supplements their focused topic with engaging and exciting writing to make for an easy-to-read and enjoyable essay. One of the largest strengths of this response is its pace. From the very beginning, we are invited to “fast-forward” and “rewind” with the writer. Then, after we center ourselves in real-time, this writer keeps their quick pace with sentences like “Substituting coffee grounds as fertilizer, using bamboo straws, starting my sustainable garden, my individual actions needed to reach a larger scale.” Community Service essays run the risk of turning boring, but this unique pacing keeps things interesting.

Having a diverse class provides a richness of different perspectives and encourages open-mindedness among the student body. The Diversity Essay is also somewhat similar to the Extracurricular and Community Service Essays, but it focuses more on what you might bring to the campus community because of your unique experiences or identities.

Learn more about how to write the Diversity Essay in our guide.

A Story of a Young Skater

​​“Everyone follow me!” I smiled at five wide-eyed skaters before pushing off into a spiral. I glanced behind me hopefully, only to see my students standing frozen like statues, the fear in their eyes as clear as the ice they swayed on. “Come on!” I said encouragingly, but the only response I elicited was the slow shake of their heads. My first day as a Learn-to-Skate coach was not going as planned. 

But amid my frustration, I was struck by how much my students reminded me of myself as a young skater. At seven, I had been fascinated by Olympic performers who executed thrilling high jumps and dizzying spins with apparent ease, and I dreamed to one day do the same. My first few months on skates, however, sent these hopes crashing down: my attempts at slaloms and toe-loops were shadowed by a stubborn fear of falling, which even the helmet, elbow pads, and two pairs of mittens I had armed myself with couldn’t mitigate. Nonetheless, my coach remained unfailingly optimistic, motivating me through my worst spills and teaching me to find opportunities in failures. With his encouragement, I learned to push aside my fears and attack each jump with calm and confidence; it’s the hope that I can help others do the same that now inspires me to coach.

I remember the day a frustrated staff member directed Oliver, a particularly hesitant young skater, toward me, hoping that my patience and steady encouragement might help him improve. Having stood in Oliver’s skates not much earlier myself, I completely empathized with his worries but also saw within him the potential to overcome his fears and succeed. 

To alleviate his anxiety, I held Oliver’s hand as we inched around the rink, cheering him on at every turn. I soon found though, that this only increased his fear of gliding on his own, so I changed my approach, making lessons as exciting as possible in hopes that he would catch the skating bug and take off. In the weeks that followed, we held relay races, played “freeze-skate” and “ice-potato”, and raced through obstacle courses; gradually, with each slip and subsequent success, his fear began to abate. I watched Oliver’s eyes widen in excitement with every skill he learned, and not long after, he earned his first skating badge. Together we celebrated this milestone, his ecstasy fueling my excitement and his pride mirroring my own. At that moment, I was both teacher and student, his progress instilling in me the importance of patience and a positive attitude. 

It’s been more than ten years since I bundled up and stepped onto the ice for the first time. Since then, my tolerance for the cold has remained stubbornly low, but the rest of me has certainly changed. In sharing my passion for skating, I have found a wonderful community of eager athletes, loving parents, and dedicated coaches from whom I have learned invaluable lessons and wisdom. My fellow staffers have been with me, both as friends and colleagues, and the relationships I’ve formed have given me far more poise, confidence, and appreciation for others. Likewise, my relationships with parents have given me an even greater gratitude for the role they play: no one goes to the rink without a parent behind the wheel! 

Since that first lesson, I have mentored dozens of children, and over the years, witnessed tentative steps transform into powerful glides and tears give way to delighted grins. What I have shared with my students has been among the greatest joys of my life, something I will cherish forever. It’s funny: when I began skating, what pushed me through the early morning practices was the prospect of winning an Olympic medal. Now, what excites me is the chance to work with my students, to help them grow, and to give back to the sport that has brought me so much happiness. 

This response is a great example of how Diversity doesn’t have to mean race, gender, sexuality, ethnicity, age, or ability. Diversity can mean whatever you want it to mean—whatever unique experience(s) you have to bring to the table!

A major strength of this essay comes in its narrative organization. When reading this first paragraph, we feel for the young skaters and understand their fear—skating sounds scary! Then, because the writer sets us up to feel this empathy, the transition to the second paragraph where the student describes their empathy for the young skaters is particularly powerful. It’s like we are all in it together! The student’s empathy for the young skaters also serves as an outstanding, seamless transition to the applicant discussing their personal journey with skating: “I was struck by how much my students reminded me of myself as a young skater.”

This essay positions the applicant as a grounded and caring individual. They are caring towards the young skaters—changing their teaching style to try to help the young skaters and feeling the young skaters’ emotions with them—but they are also appreciative to those who helped them as they reference their fellow staffers and parents. This shows great maturity—a favorable quality in the eyes of an admissions officer.

At the end of the essay, we know a lot about this student and are convinced that they would be a good addition to a college campus!

Finding Community in the Rainforest

Prompt: Duke University seeks a talented, engaged student body that embodies the wide range of human experience; we believe that the diversity of our students makes our community stronger. If you’d like to share a perspective you bring or experiences you’ve had to help us understand you better—perhaps related to a community you belong to, your sexual orientation or gender identity, or your family or cultural background—we encourage you to do so. Real people are reading your application, and we want to do our best to understand and appreciate the real people applying to Duke (250 words).

I never understood the power of community until I left home to join seven strangers in the Ecuadorian rainforest. Although we flew in from distant corners of the U.S., we shared a common purpose: immersing ourselves in our passion for protecting the natural world.

Back home in my predominantly conservative suburb, my neighbors had brushed off environmental concerns. My classmates debated the feasibility of Trump’s wall, not the deteriorating state of our planet. Contrastingly, these seven strangers delighted in bird-watching, brightened at the mention of medicinal tree sap, and understood why I once ran across a four-lane highway to retrieve discarded beer cans. Their histories barely resembled mine, yet our values aligned intimately. We did not hesitate to joke about bullet ants, gush about the versatility of tree bark, or discuss the destructive consequences of materialism. Together, we let our inner tree huggers run free.

In the short life of our little community, we did what we thought was impossible. By feeding on each other’s infectious tenacity, we cultivated an atmosphere that deepened our commitment to our values and empowered us to speak out on behalf of the environment. After a week of stimulating conversations and introspective revelations about engaging people from our hometowns in environmental advocacy, we developed a shared determination to devote our lives to this cause.

As we shared a goodbye hug, my new friend whispered, “The world needs saving. Someone’s gotta do it.” For the first time, I believed that someone could be me.

This response is so wholesome and relatable. We all have things that we just need to geek out over and this student expresses the joy that came when they found a community where they could geek out about the environment. Passion is fundamental to university life and should find its way into successful applications.

Like the last response, this essay finds strength in the fact that readers feel for the student. We get a little bit of backstory about where they come from and how they felt silenced—“Back home in my predominantly conservative suburb, my neighbors had brushed off environmental concerns”—, so it’s easy to feel joy for them when they get set free.

This student displays clear values: community, ecoconsciousness, dedication, and compassion. An admissions officer who reads Diversity essays is looking for students with strong values and a desire to contribute to a university community—sounds like this student!  

Political/Global Issues

Colleges want to build engaged citizens, and the Political/Global Issues Essay allows them to better understand what you care about and whether your values align with theirs. In this essay, you’re most commonly asked to describe an issue, why you care about it, and what you’ve done or hope to do to address it. 

Learn more about how to write the Political/Global Issues Essay in our guide.

Note: this prompt is not a typical political/global issues essay, but the essay itself would be a strong response to a political/global issues prompt.

Fighting Violence Against Women

Prompt: Using a favorite quotation from an essay or book you have read in the last three years as a starting point, tell us about an event or experience that helped you define one of your values or changed how you approach the world. Please write the quotation, title and author at the beginning of your essay. (250-650 words)

“One of the great challenges of our time is that the disparities we face today have more complex causes and point less straightforwardly to solutions.” 

– Omar Wasow, assistant professor of politics, Princeton University. This quote is taken from Professor Wasow’s January 2014 speech at the Martin Luther King Day celebration at Princeton University. 

The air is crisp and cool, nipping at my ears as I walk under a curtain of darkness that drapes over the sky, starless. It is a Friday night in downtown Corpus Christi, a rare moment of peace in my home city filled with the laughter of strangers and colorful lights of street vendors. But I cannot focus. 

My feet stride quickly down the sidewalk, my hand grasps on to the pepper spray my parents gifted me for my sixteenth birthday. My eyes ignore the surrounding city life, focusing instead on a pair of tall figures walking in my direction. I mentally ask myself if they turned with me on the last street corner. I do not remember, so I pick up the pace again. All the while, my mind runs over stories of young women being assaulted, kidnapped, and raped on the street. I remember my mother’s voice reminding me to keep my chin up, back straight, eyes and ears alert. 

At a young age, I learned that harassment is a part of daily life for women. I fell victim to period-shaming when I was thirteen, received my first catcall when I was fourteen, and was nonconsensually grabbed by a man soliciting on the street when I was fifteen. For women, assault does not just happen to us— its gory details leave an imprint in our lives, infecting the way we perceive the world. And while movements such as the Women’s March and #MeToo have given victims of sexual violence a voice, harassment still manifests itself in the lives of millions of women across the nation. Symbolic gestures are important in spreading awareness but, upon learning that a surprising number of men are oblivious to the frequent harassment that women experience, I now realize that addressing this complex issue requires a deeper level of activism within our local communities. 

Frustrated with incessant cases of harassment against women, I understood at sixteen years old that change necessitates action. During my junior year, I became an intern with a judge whose campaign for office focused on a need for domestic violence reform. This experience enabled me to engage in constructive dialogue with middle and high school students on how to prevent domestic violence. As I listened to young men uneasily admit their ignorance and young women bravely share their experiences in an effort to spread awareness, I learned that breaking down systems of inequity requires changing an entire culture. I once believed that the problem of harassment would dissipate after politicians and celebrities denounce inappropriate behavior to their global audience. But today, I see that effecting large-scale change comes from the “small” lessons we teach at home and in schools. Concerning women’s empowerment, the effects of Hollywood activism do not trickle down enough. Activism must also trickle up and it depends on our willingness to fight complacency. 

Finding the solution to the long-lasting problem of violence against women is a work-in-progress, but it is a process that is persistently moving. In my life, for every uncomfortable conversation that I bridge, I make the world a bit more sensitive to the unspoken struggle that it is to be a woman. I am no longer passively waiting for others to let me live in a world where I can stand alone under the expanse of darkness on a city street, utterly alone and at peace. I, too, deserve the night sky.

As this student addresses an important social issue, she makes the reasons for her passion clear—personal experiences. Because she begins with an extended anecdote, readers are able to feel connected to the student and become invested in what she has to say.

Additionally, through her powerful ending—“I, too, deserve the night sky”—which connects back to her beginning— “as I walk under a curtain of darkness that drapes over the sky”—this student illustrates a mastery of language. Her engagement with other writing techniques that further her argument, like the emphasis on time—“gifted to me for my sixteenth birthday,” “when I was thirteen,” “when I was fourteen,” etc.—also illustrates her mastery of language.

While this student proves herself a good writer, she also positions herself as motivated and ambitious. She turns her passions into action and fights for them. That is just what admissions officers want to see in a Political/Global issues essay!

Where to Get Feedback on Your College Essays

Once you’ve written your college essays, you’ll want to get feedback on them. Since these essays are important to your chances of acceptance, you should prepare to go through several rounds of edits. 

Not sure who to ask for feedback? That’s why we created our free Peer Essay Review resource. You can get comments from another student going through the process and also edit other students’ essays to improve your own writing. 

If you want a college admissions expert to review your essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools.  Find the right advisor for you  to improve your chances of getting into your dream school!

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What Do Colleges Look for in an Essay? Examples & Tips

What is a College Essay?

The college essay is an essential element of the college application process. It presents an opportunity for students to personalize their college application, beyond grades and scores. It can also be one of the more nerve-wracking parts of the application process. 

If you are reading this article, you are like applying to college and taking the process seriously. The quality of the college you attend will have a big effect on your entire life, and taking a few hours to make your application the best it can possibly be may be the most lucrative time investment you will ever make.

What do colleges look for in an essay from applicants?

So, what do colleges look for in an essay? The answer is similar to what colleges look for in an applicant. To hit the right notes, you need to consider the perspective and even the mission statement of the college, which of course values intelligence, a good work ethic, and the type of personality that will represent the school. 

Therefore, the core aspects that admissions officials at any institution look for in an essay are:

·         Intelligence

·         Strong communication skills

·         Ambition and goals

·         Creativity

·         Proactivity and self-direction

·         Interest in education and self-betterment

These elements are not based on any abstract moral consideration–colleges want students who will make their institution stronger. They will look for evidence of these traits in your personal essay, as grades only reflect a few of these core aspects and abilities. 

Beyond these considerations, remember that an admissions officer (an actual human being) will read your essay and respond to it both rationally and emotionally. In many cases, that emotion is boredom. Keep in mind that these officials read hundreds of application essays each admissions season. But if your essay can successfully win them over, then you’ll be getting a letter that begins with a “We are delighted to announce…”

Qualities Colleges Look for to Include in Your Essay

Most achievements that colleges are looking for will be reflected in your college application, and therefore, these have been left off of the list below. The achievements showing your passion and drive, as well as your internal and external motivations, will be the ones to include in your application essay. 

Challenging extracurricular activities

Colleges want to see students who stretch themselves beyond the limits of the classroom. The kinds of activities you choose say a lot about your personality and even your morals. Whether or not you stick with your chosen undertakings exhibits your ability to commit to important projects in the long term.

Volunteer and work experience

Any experience you have that shows true commitment, leadership qualities and an interest in community is beneficial to your application. Include the organizations or companies you worked for and what your responsibilities were at each one. If you received any promotions or special recognitions, be sure to mention those as well.

Talents and passions

More colleges are moving away from accepting students who did the most “stuff” to looking for those who focus their energy in specific areas that they’re passionate about. Schools want to see what makes you special and how hard you’re willing to work at the things you care about.

Obstacles or challenges you have overcome

One of the most important aspects of a good college student is their ability to learn from mistakes and overcome challenges in order to achieve success. This is especially true for Common App Essay prompts . In your essay, focus on what exact difficulties or challenges you faced, how you overcame them, and what you learned from this experience. After all, admissions officials are more impressed by a student who came from an adverse situation and still achieved success than they are with a student who had every advantage handed to them and skated by on position and intelligence.

What is a well-written essay?

Admissions officers read a lot of essays, and a well-written one can make a refreshing change. Students should check their essays to make sure they clearly meet these criteria:

• Does the essay provide a direct answer to the essay question?
• Does it have a strong opening paragraph that captures the reader’s interest?
• Does it put forth a comprehensive argument or narrative? Does the student make a point and stick to it?
• Does it have a natural style that’s comfortable for the student and appropriate for the subject matter?
• Did the student use effective word choice, syntax, and structure?
• Does it contain correct grammar, punctuation, and spelling?
• Is it succinct? Did the student pay attention to the recommended length?

How to Write About Positive Qualities in an Application Essay

The rule of thumb here is always “Show–don’t tell.” When writing a college essay, skip generalized information. Instead, provide real, specific examples to support your statements. Your attention to detail will help make you more memorable to an admissions officer who has to read hundreds, if not thousands, of essays. 

For example, instead of “I love hiking,” you could say, “After reaching the summit of Mt. Kilimanjaro, I decided my next adventure would be climbing Mt. Everest.” What’s the difference between these two sentences? The first says you like something, while the second one illustrates that you do—but not only that, it also shows your level of commitment and your desire for challenge. Of the two example sentences, which do you think maximizes your use of words and would be more interesting to admissions officers?

Bad example: Claim without proof My teacher once told me that I was the most skilled and intelligent student she’s ever taught, and I believed her. When I set a goal, there’s no stopping me. I’ll work at it until it’s achieved—even if it’s to my own detriment.

Good example: Showing with concrete evidence In sophomore year, I decided to set a goal to raise more money for Relay for Life than any other student involved. I asked my neighbors, family, teachers, and even my paster, who sat through my 20-minute prepared speech about why donating to this campaign would be the best use of his money. I spoke to community groups. I did three straight weekends of door-to-door fundraising. And in the end, my efforts paid off—I succeeded in raising over $500 more than any other student.

Showing initiative and ambition

Initiative and ambition are top qualities that colleges look for in an applicant. Students who exhibit these traits will bring a positive and driven attitude with them to college, where it will help them contribute to the campus and succeed in their academic endeavors.

The college essay should always show how you took some kind of action—it shouldn’t just include things that happened to you as a passive individual. For example, rather than simply writing about how it was emotionally difficult when your older sibling got sick, discuss specific coping strategies you developed during that time or ways that you contributed to helping your sibling and family.

Showing self-reflection and growth

Personal growth is one of the most popular topics to write about since it represents what the admissions essay is all about: helping the college gain better insight into your personality and character. Some schools ask targeted questions — “What was the most challenging event you have ever faced, and how have you grown from it?” — while others leave the topic open: “Describe an event that has had great meaning for you. Explain why and how it has affected you.”

One of the most successful strategies is to use a past event as a lens through which you can assess who you were and the person you became, how you have grown and changed, and your transformation. Most children are curious, but were you the one who asked your teacher what caused the change of seasons of the year and then created a solar system model and explained the concept to your classmates? Though you may think that your topic needs to be bold and unique, this is not necessary to craft an effective essay. Instead, success lies in painting an accurate and vivid picture of yourself — one that will show admissions officers that you have much to offer their school.

Structure your essay with a clear beginning, middle, and end

When you include the basic plot elements of setting, introduction, conflict, and resolution, not only will your essay be more fun to read, it will be easier to write. And when writing is easier, you are usually having more fun and pouring more of yourself into your writing. You will find that this often translates into a more compelling story as well since passion and interest are hallmarks of any good story told to a friend or included on the page of an adventure or romance novel. When structuring your narrative arc, include the lessons you have learned from these experiences: How did you change? What did you learn? What did/do you plan to do differently because of these experiences? Anyone can write about how they won first place in a competition or spent a fantastic vacation in Europe. The important stuff is not in the itinerary, but rather in the diary–what you learned from the experience and how it impacted you.

Essay Introduction #1: Focus on Your Personal Qualities

One approach when beginning your application essay is to start by describing positive character traits you possess and then showing examples of times you demonstrated those traits.

Starting with your qualities A student wants to show that he is determined and tenacious. He thinks about times when he went above and beyond what was necessary to succeed in high school. He thinks of how he became the only student at his school to participate in three or more AP classes while also being involved in multiple sports and extracurricular activities. He also thinks of his volunteer work with his church at a local homeless shelter, where he made friends and connections with shelter guests and high-profile members of the community. These are the qualities around which his essay is focused.

Essay Introduction #2: Focus on a Personal Story

Another way to approach your essay topic is to start with a story and then work show examples that demonstrative your positive qualities.

Starting with a story A student’s sibling has been fighting cancer for the past three years, and he feels that this is an important experience that has shaped who he is today. He considers how the difficulties of this experience have changed him and help distinguish him from other applicants. 

From introducing his story at the beginning of his essay, this applicant can tie in the positive qualities he exhibits with the finer details of his personal story: 

• He is independent, as he needed to deal with taking care of a loved one in a serious and sustained way that his peers did not need to deal with.
• He is focused, as dealing with regular medical emergencies has not deterred him from achieving good grades and being part of his community.
• He is empathetic, as he understands personally how hard times can impact people.

Whatever essay topic you choose, your essay should provide admissions officers concrete evidence that you are an ideal candidate for their school. Your essay should have a memorable introduction that grabs the reader’s attention and guides the rest of your essay.

Repeat Your Qualities in the Essay Conclusion

Although your essay introduction is crucial in starting your essay off in a clear and impactful direction, how you end your essay is also important as it is the last thing that will remain in the reader’s mind. One surefire way to write a strong essay conclusion is to repeat the important qualities you discussed earlier. Recall details about your personal story or repeat the qualities you introduced at the beginning of the essay. Here is an example of what a good conclusion can capture what colleges are looking for in an essay: 

Concluding your essay by repeating your qualities During my high school years, my qualities of leadership, initiative, and hard work have help shape me to become the strong student I am today. As the head of our school’s volunteer group, I showed that even a teenager can make a big impact. As a student achieving high grades in all three of my AP courses, I demonstrated my dedication to education about all. Finally, as a daughter of working-class immigrant parents, I have used my value of hard work to achieve things my parents never thought possible. These values have contributed to making me the conscientious and successful student and person I am now, and they will surely continue to assist and guide me in my academic and professional career.

Interesting Essay Topics to Write About

There are hundreds of resources available online about writing college essays (including How to Write the Common App Essay ). And while you can find dozens of interesting and fruitful essay topics that have worked, here are just a few more that are not too specific and can be molded to fit your unique profile and personal story. 

1. A unique extracurricular activity or passion 

2. An activity or interest that contrasts heavily with your profile

3. A seemingly insignificant moment that speaks to larger themes within your life 

4. Using an everyday experience or object as a metaphor to explore your life and personality 

5. An in-the-moment narrative that tells the story of an important moment in your life

Additional Tips for Writing an Essay Colleges Will Love

Choose a strong essay topic.

First, whichever structure you will use, you need to ask yourself what you actually want to accomplish in life (esp. in terms of career) . This gives you your goals. You need to choose a program that helps you reach these goals—otherwise, you should seriously reconsider whether you should even be applying!  

If you are using the “Story” structure…

The story is going to be your topic, so make it an engaging tale… but remember you are not here to show that you are the next Shakespeare. There are three ways to go here: a story/description about yourself that shaped who you are and shows who you are. A story/description of something completely different that inspires you or is a metaphor for who you are.

If you are using the “Conveying passion for a subject” structure…

In this case, you have your topic (the subject you are passionate about), but remember the essay should be about what it means to you (don’t get bogged down in describing the subject itself). Use each subsequent paragraph to illustrate how you show passion for the subject or topic you have chosen. Be sure to use concrete details within the paragraph, but begin each paragraph with a “mini-thesis statement” that gives the reader a clear and concise summary of how you demonstrate your passion in a particular way.

Engage the Reader with Your Essay’s Narrative

The admissions officer will not be interested in a mere list of your personal qualities, extracurriculars, or accomplishments. This information is included elsewhere in your application. Instead, focus on showing who you are in your essay through a narrative that includes concrete details. 

But how can you plan the topics included in your narrative essay? First, grab a pen and jot down important experiences that spring to mind. Your experience could be something negative that eventually turns out to be positive or vice-versa. The most intriguing part of a negative experience is how you handled it and, hopefully, came out on top. Give your reader a setting to help them feel like they’re a part of your story and experience this moment of change with you.

Focus on what you care about most

Consider this a kind of brainstorming exercise. Close your eyes and imagine what drives you, motivates you, excites you, and inspires you to pursue great things (or at least fantasize about doing them). This might include a hobby, a genre of music, an important person in your life, a pivotal memory or experience, a book—anything meaningful that you consider part of your identity or that defines you. 

Start by listing these items and creating a word web of other relevant or secondary aspects of this one idea, person, object, or experience. Write some brief sentences about exactly why it is important to you. Once you have your list and a few sentences written, it should be a bit easier to narrow your topic to just one or two things at most.

Essay Editing for College Application Essays

One thing all schools look for in an essay is a document that is free of errors in grammar, punctuation, mechanics, and style. Admissions essay editing services are ideal for international students who struggle with English or simply want to take their essays to the next level. Students should take care to choose a company that’s reputable and employs highly qualified editors .

Check out Wordvice’s array of professional English editing services and proofreading services , including essay editing services, to learn how our editors can improve your essays and help you get into your dream school.

Calculate for all schools

Your chance of acceptance, your chancing factors, extracurriculars, what are the most famous college application essays.

Hey guys, I'm trying to get started on my college application essays and I'm feeling a little stuck. Saw some references online about some quite famous ones. Can anyone provide examples or resources on the most famous college application essays that have made an impact on admissions or garnered significant attention? Thanks!

Sure, while it's always important to craft a college application essay that is uniquely your own, it can certainly be helpful to look at successful ones to get a sense of what works. Here are a few pieces that have received attention over the years:

1. "Costco Essay": This essay gained recognition for its engaging and clever storytelling. The applicant frames her intellectual curiosity and wide-ranging interests by chronicling her journey through a Costco store. It made its rounds on the internet due to its originality and humor.

2. "The Calculus of Love": Another well-known essay is the one detailing a student's love for mathematics through specific moments he shared with his girlfriend. The essay brilliantly interweaves his deep passion for math with a captivating love story.

3. "The Saudi Aramco World": An applicant to Yale wrote about growing up reading the 'Saudi Aramco World' magazine, with this unique lens informing his worldview and intention to study history and politics in college. This essay stood out for its authenticity and maturity.

Ensure to use these examples as inspiration, not as templates. Colleges are looking for genuine, fascinating stories that represent your personality, interests, and aspirations. Remember, the 'best' essays are the ones that can only be written by you!

About CollegeVine’s Expert FAQ

CollegeVine’s Q&A seeks to offer informed perspectives on commonly asked admissions questions. Every answer is refined and validated by our team of admissions experts to ensure it resonates with trusted knowledge in the field.

Frequently asked questions

What are colleges looking for in the essay.

In your application essay , admissions officers are looking for particular features : they want to see context on your background, positive traits that you could bring to campus, and examples of you demonstrating those qualities.

Frequently asked questions: College admissions essays

When writing your Common App essay , choose a prompt that sparks your interest and that you can connect to a unique personal story.

No matter which prompt you choose, admissions officers are more interested in your ability to demonstrate personal development , insight, or motivation for a certain area of study.

The Common App essay is your primary writing sample within the Common Application, a college application portal accepted by more than 900 schools. All your prospective schools that accept the Common App will read this essay to understand your character, background, and value as a potential student.

Since this essay is read by many colleges, avoid mentioning any college names or programs; instead, save tailored answers for the supplementary school-specific essays within the Common App.

Most importantly, your essay should be about you , not another person or thing. An insightful college admissions essay requires deep self-reflection, authenticity, and a balance between confidence and vulnerability.

Your essay shouldn’t be a résumé of your experiences but instead should tell a story that demonstrates your most important values and qualities.

When revising your college essay , first check for big-picture issues regarding your message and content. Then, check for flow, tone, style , and clarity. Finally, focus on eliminating grammar and punctuation errors .

If your college essay goes over the word count limit , cut any sentences with tangents or irrelevant details. Delete unnecessary words that clutter your essay.

If you’re struggling to reach the word count for your college essay, add vivid personal stories or share your feelings and insight to give your essay more depth and authenticity.

If you’ve got to write your college essay fast , don’t panic. First, set yourself deadlines: you should spend about 10% of your remaining time on brainstorming, 10% on outlining, 40% writing, 30% revising, and 10% taking breaks in between stages.

Second, brainstorm stories and values based on your essay prompt.

Third, outline your essay based on the montage or narrative essay structure .

Fourth, write specific, personal, and unique stories that would be hard for other students to replicate.

Fifth, revise your essay and make sure it’s clearly written.

Last, if possible, get feedback from an essay coach . Scribbr essay editors can help you revise your essay in 12 hours or less.

Avoid swearing in a college essay , since admissions officers’ opinions of profanity will vary. In some cases, it might be okay to use a vulgar word, such as in dialogue or quotes that make an important point in your essay. However, it’s safest to try to make the same point without swearing.

If you have bad grades on your transcript, you may want to use your college admissions essay to explain the challenging circumstances that led to them. Make sure to avoid dwelling on the negative aspects and highlight how you overcame the situation or learned an important lesson.

However, some college applications offer an additional information section where you can explain your bad grades, allowing you to choose another meaningful topic for your college essay.

Here’s a brief list of college essay topics that may be considered cliché:

• Extracurriculars, especially sports
• Role models
• Dealing with a personal tragedy or death in the family
• Struggling with new life situations (immigrant stories, moving homes, parents’ divorce)
• Becoming a better person after community service, traveling, or summer camp
• Overcoming a difficult class
• Using a common object as an extended metaphor

It’s easier to write a standout essay with a unique topic. However, it’s possible to make a common topic compelling with interesting story arcs, uncommon connections, and an advanced writing style.

Yes. The college application essay is less formal than other academic writing —though of course it’s not mandatory to use contractions in your essay.

In a college essay , you can be creative with your language . When writing about the past, you can use the present tense to make the reader feel as if they were there in the moment with you. But make sure to maintain consistency and when in doubt, default to the correct verb tense according to the time you’re writing about.

The college admissions essay gives admissions officers a different perspective on you beyond your academic achievements, test scores, and extracurriculars. It’s your chance to stand out from other applicants with similar academic profiles by telling a unique, personal, and specific story.

Use a standard font such as Times New Roman or Arial to avoid distracting the reader from your college essay’s content.

A college application essay is less formal than most academic writing . Instead of citing sources formally with in-text citations and a reference list, you can cite them informally in your text.

For example, “In her research paper on genetics, Quinn Roberts explores …”

There is no set number of paragraphs in a college admissions essay . College admissions essays can diverge from the traditional five-paragraph essay structure that you learned in English class. Just make sure to stay under the specified word count .

Most topics are acceptable for college essays if you can use them to demonstrate personal growth or a lesson learned. However, there are a few difficult topics for college essays that should be avoided. Avoid topics that are:

• Overly personal (e.g. graphic details of illness or injury, romantic or sexual relationships)
• Not personal enough (e.g. broad solutions to world problems, inspiring people or things)
• Too negative (e.g. an in-depth look at your flaws, put-downs of others, criticizing the need for a college essay)
• Too boring (e.g. a resume of your academic achievements and extracurriculars)
• Inappropriate for a college essay (e.g. illegal activities, offensive humor, false accounts of yourself, bragging about privilege)

To write an effective diversity essay , include vulnerable, authentic stories about your unique identity, background, or perspective. Provide insight into how your lived experience has influenced your outlook, activities, and goals. If relevant, you should also mention how your background has led you to apply for this university and why you’re a good fit.

Many universities believe a student body composed of different perspectives, beliefs, identities, and backgrounds will enhance the campus learning and community experience.

Admissions officers are interested in hearing about how your unique background, identity, beliefs, culture, or characteristics will enrich the campus community, which is why they assign a diversity essay .

In addition to your main college essay , some schools and scholarships may ask for a supplementary essay focused on an aspect of your identity or background. This is sometimes called a diversity essay .

You can use humor in a college essay , but carefully consider its purpose and use it wisely. An effective use of humor involves unexpected, keen observations of the everyday, or speaks to a deeper theme. Humor shouldn’t be the main focus of the essay, but rather a tool to improve your storytelling.

Get a second opinion from a teacher, counselor, or essay coach on whether your essay’s humor is appropriate.

Though admissions officers are interested in hearing your story, they’re also interested in how you tell it. An exceptionally written essay will differentiate you from other applicants, meaning that admissions officers will spend more time reading it.

You can use literary devices to catch your reader’s attention and enrich your storytelling; however, focus on using just a few devices well, rather than trying to use as many as possible.

To decide on a good college essay topic , spend time thoughtfully answering brainstorming questions. If you still have trouble identifying topics, try the following two strategies:

• Identify your qualities → Brainstorm stories that demonstrate these qualities
• Identify memorable stories → Connect your qualities to these stories

You can also ask family, friends, or mentors to help you brainstorm topics, give feedback on your potential essay topics, or recall key stories that showcase your qualities.

Yes—admissions officers don’t expect everyone to have a totally unique college essay topic . But you must differentiate your essay from others by having a surprising story arc, an interesting insight, and/or an advanced writing style .

There are no foolproof college essay topics —whatever your topic, the key is to write about it effectively. However, a good topic

• Is meaningful, specific, and personal to you
• Focuses on you and your experiences
• Reveals something beyond your test scores, grades, and extracurriculars
• Is creative and original

Unlike a five-paragraph essay, your admissions essay should not end by summarizing the points you’ve already made. It’s better to be creative and aim for a strong final impression.

You should also avoid stating the obvious (for example, saying that you hope to be accepted).

There are a few strategies you can use for a memorable ending to your college essay :

• Return to the beginning with a “full circle” structure
• Reveal the main point or insight in your story
• Look to the future
• End on an action

The best technique will depend on your topic choice, essay outline, and writing style. You can write several endings using different techniques to see which works best.

College deadlines vary depending on the schools you’re applying to and your application plan:

• For early action applications and the first round of early decision applications, the deadline is on November 1 or 15. Decisions are released by mid-December.
• For the second round of early decision applications, the deadline is January 1 or 15. Decisions are released in January or February.
• Regular decision deadlines usually fall between late November and mid-March, and decisions are released in March or April.
• Rolling admission deadlines run from July to April, and decisions are released around four to eight weeks after submission.

Depending on your prospective schools’ requirements, you may need to submit scores for the SAT or ACT as part of your college application .

Some schools now no longer require students to submit test scores; however, you should still take the SAT or ACT and aim to get a high score to strengthen your application package.

Aim to take the SAT or ACT in the spring of your junior year to give yourself enough time to retake it in the fall of your senior year if necessary.

Apply early for federal student aid and application fee waivers. You can also look for scholarships from schools, corporations, and charitable foundations.

To maximize your options, you should aim to apply to about eight schools:

• Two reach schools that might be difficult to get into
• Four match schools that you have a good chance of getting into
• Two safety schools that you feel confident you’ll get into

The college admissions essay accounts for roughly 25% of the weight of your application .

At highly selective schools, there are four qualified candidates for every spot. While your academic achievements are important, your college admissions essay can help you stand out from other applicants with similar profiles.

In general, for your college application you will need to submit all of the following:

• Your personal information
• List of extracurriculars and awards
• College application essays
• Transcripts
• Standardized test scores
• Recommendation letters.

Different colleges may have specific requirements, so make sure you check exactly what’s expected in the application guidance.

You should start thinking about your college applications the summer before your junior year to give you sufficient time for college visits, taking standardized tests, applying for financial aid , writing essays, and collecting application material.

Yes, but make sure your essay directly addresses the prompt, respects the word count , and demonstrates the organization’s values.

If you plan ahead, you can save time by writing one scholarship essay for multiple prompts with similar questions. In a scholarship tracker spreadsheet, you can group or color-code overlapping essay prompts; then, write a single essay for multiple scholarships. Sometimes, you can even reuse or adapt your main college essay .

You can start applying for scholarships as early as your junior year. Continue applying throughout your senior year.

Invest time in applying for various scholarships , especially local ones with small dollar amounts, which are likely easier to win and more reflective of your background and interests. It will be easier for you to write an authentic and compelling essay if the scholarship topic is meaningful to you.

You can find scholarships through your school counselor, community network, or an internet search.

A scholarship essay requires you to demonstrate your values and qualities while answering the prompt’s specific question.

After researching the scholarship organization, identify a personal experience that embodies its values and exemplifies how you will be a successful student.

A standout college essay has several key ingredients:

• A unique, personally meaningful topic
• A memorable introduction with vivid imagery or an intriguing hook
• Specific stories and language that show instead of telling
• Vulnerability that’s authentic but not aimed at soliciting sympathy
• Clear writing in an appropriate style and tone
• A conclusion that offers deep insight or a creative ending

While timelines will differ depending on the student, plan on spending at least 1–3 weeks brainstorming and writing the first draft of your college admissions essay , and at least 2–4 weeks revising across multiple drafts. Don’t forget to save enough time for breaks between each writing and editing stage.

You should already begin thinking about your essay the summer before your senior year so that you have plenty of time to try out different topics and get feedback on what works.

Your college essay accounts for about 25% of your application’s weight. It may be the deciding factor in whether you’re accepted, especially for competitive schools where most applicants have exceptional grades, test scores, and extracurricular track records.

In most cases, quoting other people isn’t a good way to start your college essay . Admissions officers want to hear your thoughts about yourself, and quotes often don’t achieve that. Unless a quote truly adds something important to your essay that it otherwise wouldn’t have, you probably shouldn’t include it.

Cliché openers in a college essay introduction are usually general and applicable to many students and situations. Most successful introductions are specific: they only work for the unique essay that follows.

The key to a strong college essay introduction is not to give too much away. Try to start with a surprising statement or image that raises questions and compels the reader to find out more.

The introduction of your college essay is the first thing admissions officers will read and therefore your most important opportunity to stand out. An excellent introduction will keep admissions officers reading, allowing you to tell them what you want them to know.

You can speed up this process by shortening and smoothing your writing with a paraphrasing tool . After that, you can use the summarizer to shorten it even more.

If you’re struggling to reach the word count for your college essay, add vivid personal stories or share your feelings and insight to give your essay more depth and authenticity.

Most college application portals specify a word count range for your essay, and you should stay within 10% of the upper limit to write a developed and thoughtful essay.

You should aim to stay under the specified word count limit to show you can follow directions and write concisely. However, don’t write too little, as it may seem like you are unwilling or unable to write a detailed and insightful narrative about yourself.

If no word count is specified, we advise keeping your essay between 400 and 600 words.

Colleges want to be able to differentiate students who seem similar on paper. In the college application essay , they’re looking for a way to understand each applicant’s unique personality and experiences.

You don’t need a title for your college admissions essay , but you can include one if you think it adds something important.

Your college essay’s format should be as simple as possible:

• Use a standard, readable font
• Use 1.5 or double spacing
• If attaching a file, save it as a PDF
• Stick to the word count
• Avoid unusual formatting and unnecessary decorative touches

There are no set rules for how to structure a college application essay , but these are two common structures that work:

• A montage structure, a series of vignettes with a common theme.
• A narrative structure, a single story that shows your personal growth or how you overcame a challenge.

Avoid the five-paragraph essay structure that you learned in high school.

Campus visits are always helpful, but if you can’t make it in person, the college website will have plenty of information for you to explore. You should look through the course catalog and even reach out to current faculty with any questions about the school.

Colleges set a “Why this college?” essay because they want to see that you’ve done your research. You must prove that you know what makes the school unique and can connect that to your own personal goals and academic interests.

Depending on your writing, you may go through several rounds of revision . Make sure to put aside your essay for a little while after each editing stage to return with a fresh perspective.

Teachers and guidance counselors can help you check your language, tone, and content . Ask for their help at least one to two months before the submission deadline, as many other students will also want their help.

Friends and family are a good resource to check for authenticity. It’s best to seek help from family members with a strong writing or English educational background, or from older siblings and cousins who have been through the college admissions process.

If possible, get help from an essay coach or editor ; they’ll have specialized knowledge of college admissions essays and be able to give objective expert feedback.

When revising your college essay , first check for big-picture issues regarding message, flow, tone, style , and clarity. Then, focus on eliminating grammar and punctuation errors.

Include specific, personal details and use your authentic voice to shed a new perspective on a common human experience.

Through specific stories, you can weave your achievements and qualities into your essay so that it doesn’t seem like you’re bragging from a resume.

When writing about yourself , including difficult experiences or failures can be a great way to show vulnerability and authenticity, but be careful not to overshare, and focus on showing how you matured from the experience.

First, spend time reflecting on your core values and character . You can start with these questions:

• What are three words your friends or family would use to describe you, and why would they choose them?
• Whom do you admire most and why?
• What are you most proud of? Ashamed of?

However, you should do a comprehensive brainstorming session to fully understand your values. Also consider how your values and goals match your prospective university’s program and culture. Then, brainstorm stories that illustrate the fit between the two.

In a college application essay , you can occasionally bend grammatical rules if doing so adds value to the storytelling process and the essay maintains clarity.

However, use standard language rules if your stylistic choices would otherwise distract the reader from your overall narrative or could be easily interpreted as unintentional errors.

Write concisely and use the active voice to maintain a quick pace throughout your essay and make sure it’s the right length . Avoid adding definitions unless they provide necessary explanation.

Use first-person “I” statements to speak from your perspective . Use appropriate word choices that show off your vocabulary but don’t sound like you used a thesaurus. Avoid using idioms or cliché expressions by rewriting them in a creative, original way.

If you’re an international student applying to a US college and you’re comfortable using American idioms or cultural references , you can. But instead of potentially using them incorrectly, don’t be afraid to write in detail about yourself within your own culture.

Provide context for any words, customs, or places that an American admissions officer might be unfamiliar with.

College application essays are less formal than other kinds of academic writing . Use a conversational yet respectful tone , as if speaking with a teacher or mentor. Be vulnerable about your feelings, thoughts, and experiences to connect with the reader.

Aim to write in your authentic voice , with a style that sounds natural and genuine. You can be creative with your word choice, but don’t use elaborate vocabulary to impress admissions officers.

Admissions officers use college admissions essays to evaluate your character, writing skills , and ability to self-reflect . The essay is your chance to show what you will add to the academic community.

The college essay may be the deciding factor in your application , especially for competitive schools where most applicants have exceptional grades, test scores, and extracurriculars.

Some colleges also require supplemental essays about specific topics, such as why you chose that specific college . Scholarship essays are often required to obtain financial aid .

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You can find all the citation styles and locales used in the Scribbr Citation Generator in our publicly accessible repository on Github .

Standard B.S.N. Application Checklist

The following must be completed to be considered for the standard B.S.N. program in Brookings, Rapid City or Sioux Falls:

• Prior to applying to the nursing program, students must apply for admission to SDSU (if you are not already a student). The university application can be completed online through the Admissions Office.
• Students who are currently enrolled at SDSU do not need to complete the university admissions application.
• The application deadline for spring admission is Sept. 25 (January start). Spring admission is available in Brookings, Rapid City and Sioux Falls. The deadline for fall admission is Jan. 25 (August start). Fall admission is available in Brookings and Rapid City only.
• Applicants are encouraged not to wait until the last day, especially after business hours or on weekends as staff will not be available to assist with any technical difficulties. 
• Visit the College of Nursing application to download the application. Any application deadline updates are also posted there.
• Eligible students may apply to the professional nursing major when all required prerequisite courses are completed or in progress and eligibility requirements are met.
• Students preparing for education in the field of professional nursing must demonstrate a stable personality and the ability to meet the demands of the professional nurse role. For admission to, progression in and completion of the undergraduate program in nursing, the student must meet technical standards for the professional nursing major.
• All courses from other institutions must be transferred and present on the SDSU transcript by the time of application to the major. If this is not possible because of courses in progress at another institution, then attach ALL college transcripts (unofficial transcripts acceptable) to the nursing application.
• Highlight the prerequisite (or equivalent) courses on the transcripts.
• If prerequisite courses are in progress at another institution at the time of application to the major, include a current transcript or course schedule which shows these courses.
• See the eligibility requirements for additional information.
• The College of Nursing requires all students who meet the definition of English as a Second Language to complete the TOEFL, IELTS or Duolingo exam, regardless of residency status.
• The minimum TOEFL score required for admission to the nursing program is 79 (iBT), with a minimum speaking score of 26. The required IELTS band score for admission to the professional program is 6.5, with a minimum of 6.0 in each module. The required Duolingo score is 110. These scores are required before the student will be accepted into the major.
• The Legal Questionnaire is a separate DocuSign form linked on application page when you apply. 
• Students who answered “yes” to legal question(s) must attach and submit the required documentation.
• Students who answered “yes” to any of the legal questions must submit copies of charges or citations and ALL communications with (to and from) the citing agency AND the court of jurisdiction, including evidence of completion/compliance with court requirements.
• These documents must be uploaded to the Legal Questionnaire itself and will go only to the director of nursing student services for compliance and legal requirements. These documents will not be seen by the reviewers of your application. 
• The essay questions are provided in the application. 
• Students are encouraged to draft and refine their essay responses offline and review them several times.
• When ready to submit, your essay questions will be copy and pasted into an online platform for scoring.  The link to that online platform will be provided in the application information for each application cycle.
• Essay questions are scored independently of each other so your response to one should not include a reference to another response.  Essay questions are scored blinded so do not include any identifying information in your essay.
• CHEM 106/106L Chemistry Survey and Lab (or CHEM 112/112L Gen Chem I and Lab)
• SOC 100 Introduction to Sociology or SOC 150 Social Problems or SOC 240 Sociology of Rural America or ANTH 210 Cultural Anthropology
• PSYC 101 General Psychology
• BIOL 221/221L Anatomy and Lab
• HDFS 210 Lifespan Development
• MICR 231/231L General Microbiology and Lab
• NUTR 315 Human Nutrition
• BIOL 325/325L Physiology and Lab
• SGR 1 Written Communication: any eligible course
• SGR 2 Oral Communication: any eligible course
• SGR 4 Arts and Humanities (it is strongly encouraged, but not required, to have one of two eligible courses completed or in progress at the time of application)
• SGR 5 Mathematics: MATH 103 or higher course
• NURS 119 Seminar

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Character Counts: What Are Colleges Looking For?

What character traits do colleges look for.

What do colleges look for besides grades when they read your application? They take into account more than your GPA and test scores. Your character and the personal qualities you can bring to a college are important, too. That's why you need to think about your goals, accomplishments, and personal values. Then, you can figure out how you can best express those in your applications.

Top Character Qualities Colleges Want

"What is it that makes you unique, and how will you contribute to the life of our campus?" That's the answer to what do colleges look for in essays, according to Earl Johnson of the University of Tulsa. University applicants who demonstrate the following qualities of a good college student have more to contribute to a school:

• Willingness to take risks
• Sense of social responsibility
• Commitment to service
• Special talents or abilities

Overall, colleges want a mix of students to create a rich campus community. They want the class valedictorians, says Marty O'Connell, executive director of Colleges That Change Lives. However, they also are looking for "students who are going to be involved in a lot of activities, and students who are musicians, and students who are athletes, and everything in between."

Your College Application Shows Your Personality Traits

So how do you show colleges what's special about you? The positive characteristics of college students are not easy to measure. Nonetheless, admission officers look at the items listed below for clues about what makes you unique.

Extracurricular activities : What you do outside the classroom reveals a lot about you. That’s why some applications ask for details about extracurricular activities . But remember, it's not the number of activities that counts. Then, what do admission officers look for? It's more about what you've learned and how you've grown from participating in these activities.

Summer jobs and activities : Your summer experiences provide insight into your character. Holding a summer job at a fast-food restaurant can build as much character as attending a prestigious summer learning program . Even staying at home to help out with babysitting or household chores like cooking for the family shows character. It's all about what you've gained, what you've learned and how you communicate that.

College essay : The college essay gives you the opportunity to show the admission officers who you are and how you will contribute to the college campus. What are admission officers looking for in a college essay? Creativity, self-awareness, and a good command of grammar top the list.

Mike Sexton, vice president for enrollment management at Santa Clara University, says that when admission officers read student essays, they ask themselves, "Would you like this person to be your roommate? Would you like to work on a group project with this person?" The essay can reveal the answers to these questions more than any test score can.

Letters of recommendation : Recommendation letters can tell a lot about the kind of person you are. A teacher who knows you well can give insight into your leadership ability or your collaborative approach to team projects. A school counselor or administrator can also offer valuable information about your service to the school community.

What characteristics are important to colleges?

Admissions officers are looking for academic excellence and character strength. When you look at a list of characteristics of college students, you probably recognize many of them in yourself. Colleges are looking for leaders who are compassionate and caring about others. They want innovators who are passionate about their pursuits and willing to take risks. So, what do admissions officers look for? They want students who have clear goals and can demonstrate that they can achieve them.

What kind of students do colleges want?

Colleges are looking for students who will succeed academically, be involved, and use their talents to help others. When college admissions specialists review your application, they are asking themselves, "What qualities best describe this applicant?" It's your job to give them the clues they need to make a favorable decision.   

How can I stand out to colleges?

The essay you write as part of the application process is one of your best chances to stand out. What do college admissions look for in an essay? Reveal your passions, talents, and character with a well-written essay. Ideally, your college essay will illustrate a project or situation that contributed to your personal growth. Many applicants find that taking the time to write a thoughtful essay also helps them figure out what to look for in a college they have been considering. 

When they review your application, admissions officials will also look closely at your extracurricular activities and what you did with your time during summer breaks. They are seeking evidence that your presence will positively impact the campus community. 

Find the right college for you.

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• Family Health Center

School of Medicine Admissions

The School of Medicine admits highly motivated and qualified students ready to become a physician. You chose this path because you want to make a positive impact in medicine, promote health and well-being, and the causes, prevention and treatment of disease and disability. We’re thrilled that you’re considering us for the next step in your journey.

We’ll help you harness the experience, resources and education to make that happen. From academics to student life, our school is centered on making your journey as a medical student enriching and memorable. Our emphasis on multiculturalism, diversity, and inclusivity creates a learning environment where you’ll feel welcome and inspired to learn.

As a full-time medical school student, you’ll enjoy a traditional college campus life and balance hard work and research with extracurriculars and community service. If you’re curious, determined and passionate about healing patients and addressing illness, and excited and driven to work in the medical field and gain knowledge and clinical experience, our Admissions Committee looks forward to reviewing your application.

Key Admissions Info

Final Application Deadline

The Admissions Committee selects students on a rolling basis. The deadline to submit your primary application is December 15 prior to the entry year for regular consideration, and August 1 for an early decision. After the interview round, you should hear back within 4-6 weeks. If you’re on the waitlist, expect to hear of a final decision between April and July.

How to Apply

Amcas primary application.

NYMC is a member of the American Medical College Application Service (AMCAS). To be considered, applicants must file their primary AMCAS application between June 1 and December 15 prior to the year of entry. For more information, email [email protected] .

NYMC Supplemental Application

All applicants receive an NYMC Supplemental Application upon submission of their primary application to AMCAS. Access to the NYMC Supplemental Application is sent to applicants via email from WebAdmit for AMCAS. Please be sure your email account is set up to accept emails from [email protected] .

What We’re Looking For

The best predictor of future academic success is demonstrated by past academic success, so we look at your undergraduate (and if applicable graduate) course of study and GPA, and your performance on standardized exams, including the MCATs. But we know that academic achievement is not a sufficient prerequisite for the study of medicine, so the Admissions Committee uses a holistic review process. The Admissions Committee looks for a balance of personal attributes – such as professionalism, altruism, compassion, empathy, honesty, integrity, cultural competency, and ethical grounding – with foundational experiences and academic metrics. We're also looking for certain core competencies for entering medical students .

In reviewing your application, we look at the breadth and quality of extracurricular, community, research, and work experiences, obstacles overcome, letters of evaluation, your personal statement, and pre-screening CASPer results (Computer-Assisted Sampling of Personal Characteristics). If applicable, impressions about an applicant gained through the MMI interview process are also given serious consideration.

If you think you’ll thrive in a learning environment based on both intellectual growth and a strong sense of service, we’re excited to hear from you.

Individuals who are currently enrolled in any medical school or have previously withdrawn or been dismissed from any medical school for any reason are ineligible to apply to the NYMC School of Medicine.

Admission Requirements

As a medical school candidate, you are required to take the Medical College Admissions Test (MCAT). NYMC will only accept MCAT scores starting from January 2022. No MCAT scores prior to January 2022 will be considered. In fairness to all applicants, there are no exceptions to these MCAT test date requirements.

How Are Multiple MCAT Scores Viewed?

Many applicants take the MCAT more than once. This is not considered a liability. We attach greatest importance to the most recent scores, although we will review the most recent last two sets of scores.

What are the Average Grades and MCAT scores of the First-Year Class?

The typical first year class enters medical school with an average overall GPA of 3.6 and median MCAT score at the 88th percentile.

Pre-medical Course Requirements

Prior to submitting your medical school application, you must successfully complete undergraduate college work. All courses offered in satisfaction of the requirements for admission must be taken at, or accepted as transfer credits by, an accredited college in the United States or Canada and must be acceptable to that institution toward a baccalaureate degree in the arts or sciences. This includes advanced placement courses taken in high school.

The admissions committee has no preference for a major field of undergraduate study, but any college work submitted must include the following specified courses in English, Biology, Physics, and Chemistry. (Although not required, some upper-level science courses with laboratory work are strongly recommended).

• English 2 semesters (or equivalent or successful completion of the English requirement(s) at your undergraduate institution)
• General Biology with lab, 2 semesters (or equivalent)
• Physics 2 semesters with lab (or equivalent)
• General Chemistry with lab, 2 semesters (or equivalent)
• Organic Chemistry with lab, 1 semester only (or equivalent)
• Biochemistry 1 semester with or without lab (or equivalent)

*We will accept online coursework and labs completed from Winter 2020 through Spring 2020. We will accept Pass/Fail grades and online coursework and labs completed in Winter 2020 & Spring 2020. For Fall 2020 through Spring 2023, this will be reviewed case by case and you should inquire with NYMC.

International Students

In order to apply to New York Medical College (NYMC) School of Medicine using the AMCAS® application, you must be a US citizen, hold an unconditional permanent resident card, have DACA status or Canadian citizenship to be considered by NYMC. All other international applicants are ineligible to apply.

As part of the satisfaction of the requirements for admission, all undergraduate coursework leading to a baccalaureate degree must be completed at an accredited college or university in the United States or Canada. Federal law mandates that only US citizens or permanent residents are eligible to receive financial aid. (Permanent residents must provide a copy of their unconditional Green Card upon request when applying for financial aid.) Review the Payment of Tuition and Fees By Foreign Medical Students policy on SOM Policies for info on the requirement for applicants who are non-US citizens or permanent residents to either:

• deposit an amount equal to four years of tuition and fees (approximately $239,000 US dollars) into a bank escrow account in advance of their matriculation to NYMC; or
• deposit an amount equal to two years of tuition and fees into a bank escrow account in advance of their matriculation to NYMC and provide a signed personal guarantee from a creditworthy, U.S. citizen for additional tuition prepayments before the start of the second and third years of the program (all deposits are due by July 1st).

Academic Articulation Agreements

• Lander College for Men/Beis Medrash L’Talmud Bachelor to Doctorate of Medicine (M.D.) from NYMC School of Medicine
• Lander College of Arts & Sciences (LAS) in Flatbush Bachelor to Doctorate of Medicine (M.D.) from NYMC School of Medicine
• Lander College for Women/The Anna Ruth and Mark Hasten School Bachelor to Doctorate of Medicine (M.D.) from NYMC School of Medicine

Medical School Interview Process

Invitation to interview.

Completed applications are given a holistic review and applicants under serious consideration are invited for an on-campus interview. Interviews are generally conducted from late September through March. Applicants may be invited to interview at any time during this period as applications are reviewed throughout the application cycle. The invitation to interview is sent to the applicant via e-mail. Applicants are offered alternate interview dates to enable them to schedule a date that accommodates their individual travel plans.

Interview Orientation

The interview day program begins at 10:50 a.m, and ends at approximately 4:00 p.m. The day begins with a group orientation with presentations from the leadership, student financial planning, admissions and current students.

Interview Format

NYMC utilizes the multiple-mini interview  (MMI)  format. During the MMI, applicants move through a circuit of short, carefully-timed scenario-based interview stations. The scenarios are neither knowledge-based nor necessarily clinically-oriented. They are designed to evaluate personal attributes of applicants based on the  inter- and intra-personal core competencies  for entering medical students endorsed by the Association of American Medical Colleges  (AAMC ).

Diversity and Review Process

We believe that a diverse student body provides a valuable educational experience that prepares medical students to practice effectively in a multicultural society. It is why we seek to admit a diverse class with respect to gender, race, ethnicity, cultural and economic background and life experience. If you come from an under-resourced background or group underrepresented in medicine, we encourage you to apply. NYMC is focused on expanding medical education opportunities for minorities and women.

School of Medicine Waitlist

NYMC does not have a ranked waitlist. The SOM Admissions Committee utilizes the process of holistic review to put together an entering class that is not only academically qualified but also reflects a broad range of backgrounds, experiences and perspectives. If a spot in the class becomes available, all applicants on the waitlist are considered.

NOTE: It is important for all applicants to keep their NYMC files updated with any additional information during the application cycle.

Non-Traditional Students

Reapplicants to the school of medicine.

Applicants who reapply receive a full review and many are accepted each year. Most successful re-applicants have taken concrete steps and time to strengthen their application such as (1) improving their MCAT score; (2) completing and doing well (minimum GPA 3.6) in a medical science master’s program; or (3) gaining meaningful clinical exposure or research experience.

Many successful re-applicants comment the extra time they spent on strengthening their application was invaluable as they were better prepared to begin medical school. Applicants who re-apply must go through the full application process again, including submitting letters of evaluation. Many undergraduate schools will keep letters of evaluation on file and resubmit them on request.

Deferred Entrance for Accepted Applicants

Accepted applicants may request a one-year matriculation deferral. Deferral requests must be submitted in writing before June 1 of the year of entry and include a detailed explanation about how the student intends to use his/her time. Additional supporting documentation may be requested. All deferral requests are considered on a case-by-case basis. Deferred students cannot apply to other medical schools during their deferral year.

NOTE: Students accepted off the waitlist are ineligible for deferral consideration.

Transfer Students

NYMC no longer accepts transfer students into the third-year class.

Financial Aid

We aim to help you overcome financial barriers to achieve your goals. Our Office of Student Financial Planning assists in all financial aspects, including helping applicants and students with financial decision-making before, during and even after attending NYMC. Our graduates have one of the lowest student loan default rates in the nation, which we proudly credit to the expert guidance of our staff.

For more information on financial aid policies and applications across NYMC, visit our Financial Aid page.

Contact School of Medicine Admissions

School of Medicine Office of Admissions Sunshine Cottage, Suite 147 New York Medical College 40 Sunshine Cottage Road Valhalla, NY 10595 (914) 594-4507 [email protected]