happy introvert essay

“Caring for Your Introvert” by Jonathan Rauch Essay

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Introduction

The author’s intended target audience, the effectiveness of the author’s writing.

In the article “Caring for Your Introvert,” Jonathan Rauch claims that introverts, who make up roughly one-third of the population, are misunderstood and undervalued in American society, which he argues is primarily geared towards extroverts. Rauch argues that introverts are not shy or misanthropic but have different needs for solitude and stimulation than extroverts. He argues that society should make more accommodations for introverts and that introverts should be more aware of their own needs and advocate for themselves.

The author’s intended target audience is likely the general public but with a specific focus on introverts who may feel misunderstood or marginalized. The author’s message is relevant to this group of readers because it provides validation and understanding for introverts and their unique needs, as well as practical advice for how they can advocate for themselves in a society that may not always accommodate them.

The author makes several choices within his writing to connect with his target audience, such as using personal anecdotes, providing examples of famous introverts, and offering practical tips and advice. Rauch also uses a conversational tone and avoids jargon, making the article accessible to a general audience. Thus, it has a semantic fullness that allows the audience to understand the meaning embedded in the text correctly.

The author’s writing is effective in understanding the audience’s purpose. He uses a personal tone and provides examples that many readers can relate to, making it easy for readers to understand and relate to the author’s message. The author also effectively makes a case for why introverts are valuable members of society and how accommodating them in a society that often values extroversion can lead to negative consequences (Rauch 135). He also provides some tips and advice for how introverts can advocate for themselves, which is helpful for readers who may feel that their needs need to be met in the current culture.

In conclusion, “Caring for Your Introvert” by Jonathan Rauch is an insightful and well-written article that addresses the often misunderstood nature of introverts and the ways in which society can better accommodate and value them. The author effectively presents a clear claim that introverts are valuable members of society with unique needs for solitude and stimulation. He also provides personal anecdotes and examples to connect with his target audience.

Rauch, Jonathan. “Caring for Your Introvert: The Habits and Needs of a Little-understood Group.” The Atlantic , vol. 291, no. 2, 2003, pp. 133–37.

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Bibliography

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What Introverts Need to Be Happy

Introverts’ brains are wired a bit differently, so they need different things in life to be happy.

I used to feel bad about being an introvert . I wished I could be more like my extroverted friends. They seemed to have no problem carrying on a conversation with anyone at any time. They didn’t seem to get mentally and physically fatigued from socializing — or from life in general — like I did.

Later in life, when I began studying and writing about introversion, I learned that introverts aren’t broken extroverts. Our brains are simply wired differently. Our minds process experiences deeply, and we require alone time to feel our best.

It’s science: Essentially, we introverts don’t need as much dopamine as extroverts do to feel satisfied. You can read more here about the science behind why introverts need alone time .

Because of this wiring, we introverts need different things in life to be happy compared to extroverts. Here are 12 of those things, which I explore more in my book, The Secret Lives of Introverts .

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1. Plenty of time to wind down and process

Yes, we introverts need downtime after things like parties and networking events. But we also need downtime after “little” things, too. Because we’re wired to process experiences deeply, introverts may get very drained by a stressful day at work, running errands, or a heated conversation with a significant other. Time to unwind allows us to fully comprehend what we just experienced and lower our stimulation level to one that’s more comfortable and sustainable. Without downtime, we’ll feel brain-dead, irritable, and even physically unwell or tired. This state is called the introvert hangover .

2. Meaningful conversation

How was your weekend ? What’s new with you? We “quiet ones” can do small talk (it’s a skill many of us have forced ourselves to learn), but that doesn’t mean we enjoy it. Introverts crave diving deep, both in our interests and in our relationships. We need something more: What’s something new you’ve learned lately? How are you a different person today than you were ten years ago? Does God exist?

Not every conversation has to be soul-searchingly deep. Sometimes introverts really do just want to talk about the weather or what you did this weekend. But if we’re only fed a diet of small talk, we’ll leave the table still feeling like we’re still hungry. Without those intimate, raw, big-idea moments, we’ll be unhappy.

(Speaking of chitchat, here’s the real reason introverts hate small talk .)

3. Companionable silence

It may seem contrary to #2, but introverts also need people in their lives who are content with quiet. We need friends or partners who can sit in the same room with us, not talking, each of us doing our own thing. People who won’t nervously jump to fill a pause in the conversation but will let thoughts linger, waiting until ideas have been fully digested. Without periods of companionable silence, introverts just won’t be happy.

4. Space to dive deep into our hobbies and interests

17th-century horror novels. Celtic mythology. Restoring old cars. Gardening , painting , cooking , or writing . If it’s out there, introverts are diving deep into it. Having time alone to focus on our hobbies and interests recharges us because, while absorbed in them, we likely enter an energizing state of flow. According to the famed psychologist Mihály Csíkszentmihályi , “flow” is a mental state in which a person is fully immersed in an activity and enjoying the process. A flow state comes naturally to many introverts, and without it, we won’t feel happy.

(Speaking of hobbies, here’s why introverts should take up new, random hobbies .)

5. A quiet space that’s all ours

Admittedly, this is something I don’t have right now because my toddler is the ultimate space-invader. However, introverts ideally need a private, quiet space to retreat to when the world is too loud. It could be a room that they can arrange, decorate, and have full control over — a true introvert sanctuary . Or it might be just a special corner, couch, or chair. Being fully alone, without fear of intrusion or interruption, is invigorating on a near-spiritual level for introverts.

6. Time to think

According to Dr. Marti Olsen Laney in The Introvert Advantage , introverts might rely more on long-term memory than working memory (for extroverts, it’s the opposite). This might explain why we introverts struggle to put our thoughts into words . While words seem to flow effortlessly for extroverts, introverts often need an extra beat to think before responding — or much longer to consider a bigger issue. Without time to process and reflect, introverts will feel stressed.

(Want to learn more? Here’s the science behind why writing tends to be easier than speaking for introverts .)

7. People who understand that sometimes we’ll be staying home

For introverts, socializing is all about dosage. We need friends and loved ones who understand that sometimes we just can’t “people” — and they accept this without giving us a guilt trip. It’s not that we don’t value their company; we simply need time to recharge. Having people in our lives who respect our need for solitude helps us maintain our energy and emotional health . This understanding allows us to show up more fully when we do spend time together.

8. A deeper purpose to our lives and work

Everyone needs to pay their bills, and for many of us, that’s why we go to work , even if we have to drag ourselves kicking and screaming. Some people are content with this arrangement, or at least tolerate it. However, for many introverts, it’s not enough — we crave work that’s purposeful and meaningful. We want to do more than just earn a paycheck and put a roof over our heads. Without meaning and purpose in our lives — whether it comes from our job, a relationship , a hobby, or something else — introverts will feel deeply unhappy.

Sometimes we just don’t have the energy to interact. We might be turned inward, doing what introverts do best — reflecting on and analyzing ideas and experiences. Pointing out, “ You’re so quiet !” or prodding us to talk only makes us feel self-conscious. At these times, let us remain quiet — it might be what we need to be happy. After we’ve had time to process and recharge, we’ll likely return with plenty to say.

10. Independence

Unique and independent, introverts are more inclined to let their own inner resources guide them than follow the crowd . We often do our best work — and are our happiest — when we have the freedom to explore ideas, spend time alone, and be self-directed. Independence allows us to tap into our creativity and inner wisdom, setting our own pace and making the decisions that are best for us. Without this autonomy, we might feel stifled.

11. The simple life

I have an extroverted friend who seems to do it all— volunteering at her son’s school , caring for her family, planning get-togethers for our friends, and holding down a full-time job . As an introvert, I’d never survive that same schedule; besides, the simple life is good enough for me. A good book, a lazy weekend, a meaningful conversation with a friend, and some snuggles from my animal companions are what make me happy.

12. Friends and loved ones who value us

We’re never going to be the most popular person in the room. In fact, in a large group, you might not even notice us at all, as we tend to remain in the background. Nevertheless, just like anyone else, we introverts need people in our lives who see our value and love us despite our quirks. We know that at times we can be difficult to deal with — nobody’s perfect. When you love and accept us as we are, even when our weird introvert behavior don’t make sense to you, you make our lives profoundly happier.

You might like:

• 10 Things That Fill Introverts With Joy
• 9 Introvert Behaviors That Seem Weird But Have a Purpose
• 27 ‘Strange’ Things Highly Sensitive People Do

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I’m the founder of this community and the author of two books: THE SECRET LIVES OF INTROVERTS , a manifesto for all the “quiet ones,” and SENSITIVE , an Amazon Best Book of the Year. An educator and a journalist, I’ve been featured in the NY Times, the Washington Post, Oprah Daily, the Guardian, and more. I started Introvert, Dear in 2013 because I wanted to write about what it was like being an introvert living in an extrovert’s world. My mission is simple: to empower introverts and sensitive people to embrace their strengths — and to start seeing their nature as a good thing. Since embracing my own introversion and sensitivity, I live a pleasantly boring life with my son in St. Paul, Minnesota.

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What Makes Introverts Happy (How To, Tips & Examples)

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Updated on January 29, 2023

Introverts are generally conceived as shy people who’d rather be alone than with others. While this might be true sometimes, it’s still a common misconception, or a stereotype, which causes people to make the mistake that introverts don’t like to be around others. But I’m not here to talk about what I think is a good description of an introvert. No, I want to focus on what makes introverts happy .

I’ve asked 8 introverts and asked them this simple question: “what makes you happy?” Here’s what makes these introverts happy:

• Watching movies
• Creative journaling
• Traveling the world

Walking outside in nature

Going to music shows alone.

• Bird-watching

This article consists of 8 real-life stories of how introverts around the world are living a happy life. I’ve asked for stories that are very specific, in order to show you what we introverts do in order to be happy.

Writing and watching movies alone

Writing and creative journaling, traveling the world alone, meditating every day on your own, watching birds with a close friend, going on long walks alone, i’m an introvert and this is what makes me happy.

Now, as a disclaimer, I want to say that this list is not exclusively made for introverts. If you consider yourself to be an extravert, then don’t leave just yet! You might find some things that you’d wanna try as well.

So whether it’s going on long walks by ourselves, or going to concerts alone, here are some real-life examples of how introverts like you and me are actively choosing to be happy.

Let’s get started with the first one!

As an introvert, I need some time alone to recharge. Here are my favorite things to do to recharge: Writing – A year or so ago I stumbled upon Bullet Journaling. It has changed my life. Putting my thoughts down on paper helps me process them. It helps to get the thoughts out of my head and onto paper. Some of my most creative ideas have come to me when I was just writing about my day. Movies alone – I love movies. I like watching them with people. But I also love watching them alone. When I go to a movie on my own, my thoughts can go wherever they go. I don’t have to worry about other people. I can just think my own thoughts. There’s a common thread here. I’m very lucky to have an amazing family and wonderful friends. And I love spending time with them. But when I’m with people, I want to focus on them. It takes a lot of mental energy. When I’m alone, I can think my own thoughts, without having to worry about the people around me. In those moments, it’s very freeing.

This story comes from Jory, a food safety lawyer at Make Food Safe .

As an introvert, it is difficult for me to be in crowds of people without getting drained. This is a bummer if you love live music like I do! In college, I used to go to shows every weekend with friends, until I got tickets to a Gorillaz show and no one could go with me. I went by myself and almost immediately made friends with people in line, and then later with people in various parts of the venue, just by wandering around. When I would feel myself getting drained, I would excuse myself and go dance by myself. I discovered that it was far less draining to exist in a crowd without having to interact with anyone in particular, so I started going to shows by myself, and still do to this day! The best part is, I can leave whenever I want without anyone complaining that we’re leaving too early/late.

This story comes from Morgan Balavage, a yoga teacher and wellness coach at Splendid Yoga .

Want to know what’s been a huge game-changer in my happiness and well-being? Writing in a journal. It’s a practice I took up about three years ago and it has made incredible impacts on my life. Compared to my extroverted counterparts, I find that I can’t quite articulate my thoughts to other people. Writing in a journal has helped me gain perspective, make tough decisions, and create happy and positive self-talk. It might be a little tough to get started, but don’t get discouraged. Start with writing three daily gratitudes and your feelings about the upcoming day. In no time you’ll discover a groove that works for you in cultivating happiness.

This story comes from Maryna, who considers herself to be a certified nerd in all things communication .

What made me happy as an introvert: As an introvert I have found that I really enjoy traveling internationally by myself. I can pick what I would like to do without consulting with or telling another person. I went on a trip to Milan by myself and after exploring the city by foot I found that I was bored so I booked a day trip to Switzerland. It was perfect for an introvert. Everyone else on the tour had a significant other so they did not reach out to me and it was great. I explored to my heart’s content and genuinely enjoyed being alone. It was a perfect activity for an introvert.

This story comes from Alisha Powell, who is a therapist and social worker that enjoys international travel and discovering great restaurants.

I’ve always been a big fan of simply going outside, and preferably in nature. I need it. When I lived in downtown Portland, I mapped out my own personal urban hike that I loved. It took me from downtown through the International Rose Test Garden to a bark chip trail that peeked over the Japanese Gardens, and into the Hoyt Arboretum. On my way back, I passed a playground on a west hill peak that overlooked the city. There was one swingset with a particularly wide seat. If time allowed, I would always treat myself to a swing at this almost-always deserted but beautiful hilltop. Swinging, by the way, is also an awesome outdoor workout. If done early in the morning, like me, you usually have the entire place to yourself. Another introvert’s dream. Now, living in a quickly growing chunk of suburbia that still toes the line between the suburbs and rural farmland, I’ve discovered a little wooded trail that I include in my hour-long walks. The forest, the woods, they heal. There’s something in humans that crave it and need it. Unfortunately, we aren’t all able to easily access it. However, if we live in a safe neighborhood or can get to one, we all have access to simply being outside. It doesn’t have to be gardening or hiking. It can be playing hop scotch with your kids at a tucked away park, cycling, skateboarding, or, hell, even Pokemon Go. You just go.

This is the story of how Jessica Mehta finds happiness as an introvert.

I began my journey into meditation by attending a retreat in northern Thailand. I spent seven nights there, and didn’t say a word (aside from our morning and evening chanting) to anyone the entire time. It was glorious. As an introvert, I felt like I was totally free – not bound by the necessity to explain myself, not incumbered by the tedium of small talk. After the retreat, I took up meditation as a daily practice. I meditate for twenty-one minutes each morning, no matter where I am. Those moments with myself are some of my favorite moments of my entire day.

This story comes from Jordan Bishop, founder of How I Travel .

Once, along with a friend of mined (closed one), I went into nearby woodlands to watch birds. And let me tell you, it was one of the most blissful moments. We both watched birds from a distance through binoculars, discussed various species, their habits; this one on one conversation with a best friend in a silent environment was very soul soothing. The reason I loved it was I got to learn more about birds, the environment was silent, and I got to share my own thoughts very clearly. It’s a very amazing activity for introverts, as you get away from the loud noises and crowd, and feel connected with yourself.

This story comes from Ketan Pande, founder at Good Vitae .

When I lived in Denmark for a few years, I was fortunate enough to live very close to a small lake. In the beginning, I didn’t realize how good this would be. As time passed and I had to deal with high-stress projects and assignments quite frequently, this really took a toll on my overall happiness. One day I was working from home and really needed a break to get out of the house. Since the weather was nice, I decided to go for a walk to the lake. Turns out, there was a groomed walking path around the entire perimeter which only took slightly more than half an hour to complete! I remember the stress being lifted off my shoulders the further I walked along. There was just something about the water, the trees, and the sense of tranquility that felt very calming. I hadn’t realized how much I needed the time to myself – to recharge and to let my mind wander. During the time I lived there, I walked the trail probably over 50 times and it definitely affected my happiness in a positive way.

This last story comes from Lisa, who blogs at Board & Life .

Yes, it might not come as a surprise, but I consider myself to be an introvert as well! Nice to meet you.

💡 By the way : If you want to start feeling better and more productive, I’ve condensed the information of 100’s of our articles into a 10-step mental health cheat sheet here. 👇

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Now, what makes me happy as an introvert? Here’s a couple of things that come to mind:

• Spending quality time with my girlfriend.
• Enjoying time out with friends (as long as it’s not at a crowded and loud bar!)
• Running long-distances
• Making music
• Working quietly on this website!
• Watching Game of Thrones and rewatching the Office
• Playing Battlefield on my Playstation
• Journaling about my boring and happy life 🙂
• Going on long walks when the weather is nice, like this:

Enjoying a silent moment of peace amidst a busy month

Again, these are not things that exclusively introverts might enjoy doing. I love spending time with other people. I just need a little more alone time after being social.

You can put me in a room with just a guitar and chances are you can leave me there for a good part of the day without any complaints.

The thing is, I’m pretty good at managing myself. I know what I need in order to be happy. I’ve getting to know myself – and what my happiness formula is – for the last 5+ years. I track my happiness every single day and want to show you how much you can learn with this simple method.

It’s why I created Tracking Happiness .

Founder of Tracking Happiness, with over 100 interviews and a focus on practical advice, our content extends beyond happiness tracking. Hailing from the Netherlands, I’m a skateboarding enthusiast, marathon runner, and a dedicated data junkie, tracking my happiness for over a decade.

2 thoughts on “What Makes Introverts Happy (How To, Tips & Examples)”

is there a way to be happy without friends and family? of course every one enjoys alone time more or less, but how to always be happy when you never have close people around? This article didn’t cover that or maybe that is not even possible, although compulsory!

I’ve written an article dedicated to that question: can you be happy without friends and family? It’s here: https://www.trackinghappiness.com/can-you-be-happy-without-relationship-or-friends/

Hopefully that will give you more answers! It’s a difficult subject though, and it totally depends on who’s asking. 🙂

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The Surprising Benefits of Being an Introvert

T here are a lot of misconceptions about introverts — like that they’re antisocial, unfriendly, shy or lonely. But in many cases, being an introvert can actually be an asset.

Introverts are people who get their energy from spending time alone, according to Dr. Jennifer Kahnweiler, author of The Introverted Leader: Building on Your Quiet Strength . “It’s kind of like a battery they recharge,” she says. “And then they can go out into the world and connect really beautifully with people.”

A 2008 study published in the Journal of Motor Behavior found that introverts take a longer time to process information than extroverts. Kahnweiler says this is actually because they process more thoughtfully than extroverts do — they take extra time to understand ideas before moving on to new ones.

While we’re all often flooded with messages that we need to speak up and stand out in order to be successful, introverts can actually achieve even more if they hone their natural strengths, says Beth Buelow, author of The Introvert Entrepreneur: Amplify Your Strengths and Create Success on Your Own Terms .

“It’s not about becoming a fake extrovert,” Buelow says. “It’s really about acknowledging the valuable traits that introverts bring.”

Here are some of the benefits of being an introvert:

They’re good listeners

Introverts are naturally adept when it comes to actively listening, according to Buelow, who identifies as an introvert herself. “We tend to be the friend or colleague you can call on when you’re upset or you have good news to share,” she says. “We’re going to be able to listen and be with you in that, without turning it around and making it about us.”

Extroverted people are more inclined to jump into a conversation before fully processing what the other person has said. Not because they’re selfish or don’t care, but because they process information interactively, says Dr. Laurie Helgoe, author of Introvert Power: Why Your Hidden Life is Your Hidden Strength .

Conversely, introverts process information internally, Helgoe says. That skill allows them to hear, understand and provide carefully considered insight when they do respond.

They think before they speak

Because introverts typically feel less comfortable speaking than they do listening, they choose their words wisely, according to Buelow. “We only speak when we have something to say, so there is a higher chance that we will have an impact with our words,” she says.

That being said, introverts may take a little too long to formulate their thoughts before sharing them — especially in fast-paced business settings. To combat that tendency, Buelow suggests that introverts should go into meetings prepared to speak first, before there’s time to talk themselves out of it. “Break your own ice,” she says, advising introverts to share a piece of data or an opening remark for the top of the meeting. “Establish your presence early on before the conversation gets thicker and more competitive.”

The skill of choosing your words wisely is just as beneficial online as it is in person. Introverts are more effective on social media because they’re less prone to knee-jerk reactions than extroverts, says Kahnweiler.

“Some people are just throwing thoughts everywhere, randomly posting everything — not introverts,” she says. “There’s a strategy that they take.”

They’re observant

In addition to their superior listening skills, introverts possess what Buelow considers a “superpower”: their observation skills. “We notice things others might not notice because they’re talking and processing out loud,” she says. Although it may look like they’re just sitting quietly during a meeting, introverts are actually soaking in the information that’s being presented and thinking critically.

The typical introvert also uses his or her observant nature to read the room. They’re more likely to notice people’s body language and facial expressions, which makes them better at interpersonal communication, according to Kahnweiler.

Introverts are especially skilled at noticing introvert qualities in others, Kahnweiler says. They can tell when a person is thinking, processing and observing, and then give them the space to do so, which makes people feel much more comfortable, according to Kahnweiler. “They allow time to really connect with people,” she says.

They make quality friends

Since introverts can feel their energy being drained by being around other people — as opposed to extroverts, who gain energy from being with others— introverts choose their friends wisely. They would rather have a few close, trusted friendships to invest their time and energy in, as opposed to a large network of acquaintances, according to Buelow.

“Introverts are pretty picky about who we bring into our lives,” Buelow says. “It requires some energy, and if you do come into our inner circle, that means a lot.”

This quality causes introverts to be loyal, attentive and committed friends, says Buelow.

They make loving romantic partners

Introverts crave personal space to reflect and refuel, and they can sense when their partners need space, too. “Because we have this need for our own privacy, we give that to others as well,” says Buelow. “We won’t be super clingy or high maintenance in relationships.”

And the same qualities that make introverts great listeners also make them great partners, according to Kahnweiler. At the end of a long day, they’re there to listen and support their partner without feeling compelled to talk about themselves.

Introverts also like to get to know someone before sharing intimate details with a prospective partner, and it can make them appear more appealing in the early stages of relationships.

“There can be something attractive about the mystery factor of introverts,” says Helgoe. “That can inspire curiosity and wanting to know the person better.”

They’re thoughtful networkers

Being in a large group where the goal is to meet, talk and make a good first impression can be overwhelming for many — especially for introverts. But Buelow says they can use their natural strengths to create meaningful connections. Extroverts may approach networking events with the goal of talking to as many people as possible, but often, those quick conversations don’t leave lasting impacts, says Buelow.

But Buelow says the strength in networking is not necessarily in numbers. Introverts, she says, should focus on learning about people they meet — even if they only connect with a handful of people.

“I try to make meaningful connections with a couple of people that I can follow up with in some way,” says Buelow. After an event, she’ll send links to articles or speeches that made her think of the person she spoke to. This type of active listening and follow-up can be a lot more beneficial than simply handing out 50 business cards, she says.

They’re compassionate leaders

Helgoe says introverts can make the best leaders — when they channel their natural strengths. For starters, they don’t feel the need to step into the spotlight and take all of the credit for group successes; rather, they are likely to highlight the strengths of their teams, according to Helgoe.

“An extroverted leader may be noticeable, but you may see the leader before you see the team,” Helgoe says. And employees who feel recognized tend to be more motivated, she says.

And since introverts process information more slowly and thoughtfully than their extroverted counterparts, introverted leaders tend to learn more about their subordinates, according to Kahnweiler. They have focused conversations with their team members in order to learn their skills, passions and strengths, according to Kahnweiler. Once they gather all of this information, they can use what they’ve learned to help each team member be more efficient and happier at work.

“People will talk about their favorite managers and they’ll say, ‘They were with me,’” Kahnweiler says. “‘Even if there were more pressing things, I felt like I had their attention. I had their ear.’”

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Introvert Essay Examples

As introverts can often be misunderstood or overlooked in society, writing an essay on introverts can be an interesting topic. Whether you are an introvert yourself or interested in exploring the topic, this article will provide some helpful insights and tips on how to write a compelling essay on introvert.

Firstly, start by brainstorming some ideas for your essay. Consider what you want to convey about introverts and what specific aspects you want to focus on. This could be discussing the challenges introverts face in social situations or highlighting the strengths of introverts in leadership positions. Having a clear direction for your essay will help you stay focused and organized.

Next, gather some research to support your ideas. This can help you build a strong argument and provide evidence for your claims. You can even use examples from literature or film that feature introverted characters, such as Holden Caulfield in “The Catcher in the Rye” or Bella Swan in “Twilight”.

When writing your essay, consider the tone and structure. An introvert essay can be written in a reflective, introspective style, or it can be more analytical and research-based. Whichever approach you choose, make sure your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.

If you need inspiration, there are plenty of introvert essay examples available online. Take note of the structure, tone, and arguments presented in these essays and use them as a guide for your own work.

When writing an introvert college essay, it can be helpful to relate your topic to your personal experiences. Discuss how being an introvert has affected your academic or social life and what strategies you have used to cope with any challenges. This can make your essay more relatable and engaging to readers.

In conclusion, by following these tips and utilizing the resources available, you can write a compelling and informative essay on this fascinating topic.

Compare and Contrast Analysis of Introverts and Extroverts

Introverts and extroverts are two distinct personality types that play a significant role in shaping how individuals interact with the world around them. Understanding the differences and similarities between these two types can provide valuable insights into human behavior and relationships. This compare and contrast...

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A Journey From Being An Introvert To Being An Extrovert

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Being Introvert, Not An Extrovert Is No Barrier To Entrepreneurship

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The Differences Between The Introvert And Extrovert

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Reflections and Research of an Introvert Students

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Media-Based Misconseptions about Introverts

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Negative Stereotypes and Stigma against Introverts

When struck by the terms ‘introvert’ and ‘extrovert’ our brain instantly judge’s a person’s character traits. If introverted, we think of them as a nerd or socially awkward and if extroverted, we think of them as a party animal or narcissistic. However, these stereotypes are...

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Treatment Inequality at Work: Extroverts and Introverts

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Detection And Investigation Of Extreme Introvertedness

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Best topics on Introvert

1. Compare and Contrast Analysis of Introverts and Extroverts

2. A Journey From Being An Introvert To Being An Extrovert

3. Being Introvert, Not An Extrovert Is No Barrier To Entrepreneurship

4. The Differences Between The Introvert And Extrovert

5. Being an Introverted Leader and how it Affects Upward Mobility

6. Reflections and Research of an Introvert Students

7. Jobs Best Suitable for Intoverts

8. Media-Based Misconseptions about Introverts

9. Negative Stereotypes and Stigma against Introverts

10. Treatment Inequality at Work: Extroverts and Introverts

11. Detection And Investigation Of Extreme Introvertedness

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How to Make an Introvert Happy

Last Updated: January 9, 2022 References

This article was co-authored by Nicolette Tura, MA and by wikiHow staff writer, Megaera Lorenz, PhD . Nicolette Tura is an Empowerment Coach based in the San Francisco Bay Area. She holds a decade of experience creating change in various non-profits then went on to operate her own wellness business for 10 years. Most recently, she worked as a Therapy Associate to a chiropractic neurologist for 15 months working hands-on with patients, helping them heal from neurological disorders like concussions, long covid, migraines, and more. Nicolette guides groups and individuals on transformative meditation journeys and game-changing mindset management workshops and retreats on empowering everyone to keep expanding beyond past conditioning and self-limiting beliefs. Nicolette is a 500-hour Registered Yoga Teacher with a Psychology & Mindfulness Major, a NASM certified Corrective Exercise Specialist, and an expert in psychophysiology with experience in nervous system regulation and breath work. She holds a BA in Sociology from the University of California, Berkeley, and a Master’s degree is Sociology from San Jose State University. There are 8 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been viewed 22,637 times.

If you’re the more outgoing type, you might wonder about how to keep the introvert in your life happy. While leaving them alone might seem like the obvious answer, the truth is that most introverts need social time—they just want to have it on their own terms. In this article, we’ll guide you through the best ways to respect your introverted loved one’s need for quiet time, while also helping them feel loved and included.

Respect their space.

• If you’re not sure whether or not they need alone time, just ask. Say something like, “Do you want to be alone right now?” or, “Is this a good time to talk, or should I come back later?”
• If you live with an introvert, try to let them have their own space where they can go to be alone. For instance, they might need to go into their room and close the door sometimes.

Give them time to recharge.

• For instance, you can say something like, “Hey, would you be interested in grabbing a drink tonight? I know you usually want some time alone after work, so maybe we could shoot for 8:00.”

Engage them in deep conversation.

• For example, if you know an introvert who’s a writer, you might ask them about what they’re currently working on. Say something like, “How’s that short story coming along? Did you want to bounce some plot ideas around?”
• Introverts tend to hold back their thoughts and feelings more than extroverts, so it’s important for them to vent from time to time. Let them know that you’re there if they want to talk, but don’t push them to open up if they’re not in the mood.
• On the other side of the coin, introverts often make great listeners. Don’t be afraid to open up to them about your own deep thoughts and feelings, if they have the energy for it!

Slow down and let them talk.

• Introverts may feel especially awkward about piping up in group conversations. If you’re chatting with several people and they look like they have something to say, give them an opening. For instance, say something like, “What do you think, Lila?”
• Listen attentively to what they have to say. Ask follow-up questions to show that you’re interested and paying attention.
• Keep in mind that some introverts are perfectly happy to just sit back and let others do the talking. When in doubt, you can always ask (but do it privately so you don’t put them on the spot). For instance, say something like, “Hey, was I talking too much back there? I wasn’t sure if you wanted to jump in and say something.”

Ask them what they need.

• Asking them how they’re feeling, and what you can do to help if they’re stressed or down. Don’t keep pushing if they’re not in the mood to talk about it, though.
• Asking about their boundaries. For instance, are they okay with going to a party once in a while as long as they get to leave early, or are they only comfortable socializing in small groups?
• Checking in about whether they want company or need time alone.

Spend time with them one-on-one.

• For example, you might meet for coffee once a week, have a regular game night, or go for walks together.

Invite them to stuff.

• Keep it low-key, and don’t push it if they say no. Say something like, “I’m having a little get-together with some of my college buddies this weekend if you want to come. If not, no biggie!”
• If they do show up, make it clear you don’t expect them to stay long or to participate in anything they don’t feel comfortable with. Say something like, “We’ll be playing some games later in case you’re interested, but I know you probably need to head out soon.”
• Don’t surprise them or mislead them about what the event will be like. For instance, don’t say it will just be you and one other friend, then invite a bunch of other people to join you at the last minute.

Text instead of calling.

• If you really want to call them, ask or give them a warning first. Send a text saying something like, “Is this a good time to call? I just wanted to talk about our plans for next week.”
• They might also enjoy connecting online (for example, over email, Facebook, instant messenger, or a chat platform, like Discord).

Give them advance notice of social plans.

• For example, you might say, “I’m inviting 6 of my coworkers over next week for a poker night, it’ll be on Friday at 7:00. Would you like to come?”
• Avoid putting pressure on them to make the plans, since this can be very stressful for a lot of introverts. [11] X Research source Give them a set time and date. If it doesn’t work, you can always try again another time.

Embrace the quiet moments.

• For example, you might sit together and do work, listen to music, or quietly watch a TV show or movie together.

Expert Q&A

You might also like.

• ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-introverts-corner/201509/5-essential-tips-introvert-extrovert-couples
• ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-friendship-doctor/200911/the-inside-scoop-your-introvert-friends
• ↑ https://www.today.com/health/why-you-should-date-introvert-t108574
• ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-introverts-corner/201801/are-introverts-better-friends-extroverts
• ↑ https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2021/05/introverts-extroverts-happiness-gap-pandemic/618925/
• ↑ https://www.cnbc.com/2019/09/19/acting-extroverted-improves-introverts-wellbeing-happiness.html
• ↑ Nicolette Tura, MA. Empowerment Coach. Expert Interview. 23 January 2020.
• ↑ https://www.thecut.com/2018/06/ask-polly-i-love-my-friends-but-i-hate-making-plans.html

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Student ‘How To’ Contest Winner

How to Befriend an Introvert

A winning essay by Ashley Zhang, age 14.

By The Learning Network

This essay, by Ashley Zhang, 14, of West Vancouver, British Columbia, is one of the Top 11 winners of The Learning Network’s new “How To” Informational Writing Contest for Teenagers .

We are publishing the work of all the winners over the next several days, and you can find them here as they post.

“Us introverts can be wild — even more than extroverts sometimes. But we hide that side from most and show it to the ones we care about,” says Cyki Kamei, a young introvert suffering from misunderstanding in Canada. In schools, teachers see introverts as problems, but what teachers don’t know is that when introverts are with people they love, they tend to act like extroverts.

One of the first and easiest steps to understanding an introvert is to know why they are different from most people. “Although it’s a well-known stereotype, introversion is not shyness. Where shyness is like social anxiety, introversion is more like a lower need for external stimulation,” Cyki says. Due to this stereotype, people think that someone sulking in the corner at a party or someone quiet is an introvert. Once you understand that introversion is just a preference for solitude rather than a fear of social interaction, you have already figured out introverts better than most of the population.

“Schools are the most draining places for introverts since they often force students to interact with each other, which drains an introvert’s social battery faster,” Cyki states. Unlike extroverts, who find people energizing, introverts find “people time” draining. Long days of socializing in school can exhaust introverts, who then need alone time.

So how can you know when to talk to your introvert? Try to observe where on the social battery scale they are at. If they seem to be low, as if they are actively avoiding people, leave them be. They have had enough of social interaction and would love to recharge with some alone time.

But what if your introvert isn’t feeling low? Go and strike up a conversation! “Most introverts have something called ‘small-talk-o-phobia,’” Cyki reveals. Examples of small talk might be going up to them and saying, “Nice weather.” You will scare most of them half to death. Instead, try to get to know them more. Though introverts hate small talk, they do enjoy deep conversations about things they love. By having these conversations, even if you hit a roadblock, you could still find the “wild” part of your introvert.

“Don’t be scared of silence with an introvert,” Cyki says. “Introverts like to think before they speak.” Embrace the way introverts are. “Introversion is not a ‘mark of a devil,’” Cyki declares. “Embracing it is what we must do as a society.”

How to be Happy as an Introvert

How to be happy as an introvert, what is an introvert, 11 challenges introverts may face, 14 ways to be happy as an introvert, further exploration – articles & media, your take – comments, what is an introvert.

An introvert is a personality type, the opposite to an extrovert. They are generally people who are quiet, thoughtful, reserved and sometimes reticent. They prefer focussing on their own inner thoughts and ideas rather than reacting to external stimuli. They prefer calm situations and environments and may have a tendency to avoid large social gatherings.

Recognising as an introvert can help in life as it can be the stepping stone to accepting the associated behaviours. The challenges introverts face and 14 ways to be happy as an introvert below.

In a world where extroverts speak louder, introverts may face a number of challenges. Some of the challenges may include;

• Not wanting to participate in small talk
• Not being able to find alone time
• Potential to be anxious around social situations
• Feeling a need to avoid social situations
• Feeling tired after social gatherings or being in a large group
• Having to finding excuses not to accept invites
• Avoiding being the centre of attention
• Not being understood as an introvert by others or being seen as “shy”
• Feelings of not being accepted
• Being interrupted or talked over
• Giving a “negative impression” as others may interpret their behaviour as rude or unwilling to participate 

14 Ways to be happy as an introvert

Introverts may face challenges however they can still lead a fulfilling and experienced life just as any other personality type might do. Ways to be happy as an introvert below and more in further exploration;

• Recognise that you may well be an Introvert: It’s just your personality
• And There is Nothing Wrong With That
• Understand Yourself:  Understand your behaviours and beliefs. You might want time alone, you may not want to talk over others or be the centre of attention. You may not want to attend social functions. And that is fine. It’s just the way you are
• Focus on Your Strengths: Introverts have many strengths including being good listeners, being able to deeply think things through, being observant and making good friends. Recognise your strengths and play to them.
•  Introverts have made huge contributions to the world: Albert Einstein, Elon Musk, Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, JK Rowling, Emma Watson, Mark Zuckerberg, Sir Isaac Newton, Steven Spielberg, the list goes on. You’re in good company.
• Keep Things Simple: Don’t overcomplicate life with too many social engagements and commitments. Be comfortable with the things you agree to do. Keep things quiet and simple.
• Do Make an Effort: Do make an effort to socialise and be around others. Humans are social creatures and need social interactions. Doing so will give you a boost.
• Take Time to Relax: Take time to wind down following both social gatherings and just after a general day. The continual thinking often associated with introversion can be tiring.
• Enjoy Silence: Don’t always feel the need to try and make small talk. Say things and make contributions when you want to make them
• Schedule Alone / Quiet Time: Schedule some time in the day to reflect and think things through 
• Be Around Like Minded Others:  Have quiet, calm and deep conversations (skip the small talk). 
• Surround Yourself With People Who Understand You: Spend time with people who understand you (you’ll know who they are) so you can be you
• Look After Yourself: Keeping yourself in good shape, eating and drinking well and exercising will keep your mind and body, and ultimately your mood, in good health.
• Speak to Someone: If you are really struggling with some of your introverted ways or people not understanding you, speak to someone. Whether it be a trusted friend or relative or a professional therapist or counsellor, do get help if you need it. A problem shared is truly a problem halved.  

Further Exploration - Articles & Media

Article: 12 Things Introverts Absolutely Need in Life to Be Happy

Article from Introvert Dear (The Award Winning Community For Introverts) looking at 12 ways to be happy including having friends and loved ones who value us despite our quirks & taking space to dive deep into hobbies and interests & myths about introverts. Introvert Dear also has a wealth of other information to help introverts.

Article: Introvert Personality

WebMD article looking at the introvert personality type with information including; what an introvert is, signs you might be one, causes of introversion, types of introversion, introversion vs shyness and myths about introverts

Book: Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking

Susan Cain's book discussing the rise and prominence of the Extrovert Ideal throughout the twentieth century and how we can dramatically undervalue introverts and how much we lose in doing so. ***This is one of the few affiliate links on Peaceful Soul***

Forum: What is the hardest thing about being an introvert?

Forum on Quora with over 60 answers discussing issues such as relationship problems but also looking at the positive side of being an introvert including being a good listener and being in touch with themselves

Video: How To Be Popular As An Introvert

The Charisma on Command Youtube channel looks at introvert leaning Keanu Reeves and his popularity as an introvert. Reasons include always giving praise to others and exuding a zen-like presence.

Article: 11 Simple Ways to Make an Introvert Happy

11 simple ways to make an introvert happy in an on article Medium by Anastasia Shch. Suggestions include giving them space, letting them speak and respecting their alone time

Article: 4 Ways Introverts Can Super-Charge Their Happiness

4 ways an introvert can super charge their happiness including focussing on strengths and socialising selectively

Article: Common Life Challenges of an Introvert

4 common life challenges of an introvert from Success Story including having to hang out when you want to be alone and not being considered good enough to be leader

Article: Six Key Challenges for Introverts

LinkedIn article by Jennifer Kahnweiler Ph.D. CSP discussing 6 key challenges introverts face at work including difficulty to self-promote and an emphasis on teams

Further Mental Wellbeing Guides from Peaceful Soul

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Happy introvert

It’s been 12 months since I deleted my Facebook and Twitter accounts.

I set up my Facebook profile way back in 2008-2009, and my Twitter account in 2010. I enjoyed them so much that I became addicted. Coming home from school, I remember, I’d drop my books and other study materials on the floor and immediately log in to Facebook and wait for my friends to get online as well. And we’d chat for hours! There were times when I went to bed past midnight and got only three or four hours of sleep.

But all went well. The game apps, like Farmville and Tetris Battle, were such fun. I followed trending topics and viewed viral media. I “liked” thousands of pages and profiles—most of which were pure nonsense—just because these appeared in my newsfeed. Gradually I felt… fake.

I asked myself: What do these mean to me? Why do I send and accept friend requests, and follow people I barely know? My Facebook listed 500-plus contacts, and I followed 100 on Twitter. Out of all these, I noted that I regularly spoke to only around five individuals. Honestly, I felt plastic. You know—“friends in the Web, but strangers in real life.” Terrible.

Some friends suggested that I “purge” the “friends” list, which meant “unfriending” and removing contacts. I spent a few months “unliking” pages and “unfriending profiles.” I even contemplated renewing an account just to start over.

I reviewed my profile and realized that I wasn’t as active as the others. My accounts seemed like a waste. Social networks sort of pressure you to expose your life in the form of media and status updates, to reveal your inner thoughts, under the notion that multiple “likes” or retweets will boost your self-esteem or whatever. It’s like a popularity contest—mean and cruel.

I just fell out of love, I guess. I understand and respect the value of privacy—something a supposed introvert should know. I like solitariness; you are free to focus on a goal without social distractions. (But, of course, I still sometimes have the desire to share my life with close friends.)

So I began to limit my posts until I became just a viewer, silently reading and silently liking. Mid-August of 2014, a few days after my family moved into a new house, I decided to cut myself off from social networks. Start a new life, I told myself.

With one click of confirmation, my Facebook account was deactivated and permanently deleted after 14 days; Twitter was removed after 30.

Initially I felt bad. Some of my most memorable friendships were formed and strengthened in and through social networks. It was through Facebook chat that I had the chance to speak out and share mutual interests with friends. Unfortunately, social networking becomes a deceitful prison if one is not careful.

Your mind locks itself in a virtual realm, surrounding you with interim entertainment that will soon bore you. True, I was greatly updated by all the available information, but as an individual, I couldn’t tear myself away from the lure of social networks. Being online turned me into a puppet, a mindless being who let time pass unproductively.

So I leaped far from its iron bars. But the idleness that ensued after I regained my freedom almost drove me mad! I had an itch I couldn’t scratch. I’m in a new house in a new neighborhood, and I had nothing to do.

With time on my hands, I resurrected past interests and renewed and improved skills. For example, I learned how to make and knead dough, and have perfected savory masterpieces like chicken empanada, doughnuts, scones and biscuits, and fruit pies.

What I truly appreciate now is that I’m nourishing my passion for writing. I’ve always claimed to love to write and that I wanted to write a novel—but I have nothing to show. Now I’m pushing myself to act on my goals, especially while I’m still in my youth. The soil won’t till itself, you know.

In the 12 months since I deleted my Facebook and Twitter accounts, I have not felt like a fool. With each breath I remember that I have a life to live, and memories to form and to keep. I am not a virtual man.

I am … real.

Ferdinand Marquee Fuentes, 21, says he is an aspiring writer.

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Caring for Your Introvert: The Habits and Needs of a Little-understood Group

Advantages of being an introvert, introversion and extroversion.

An introvert is a person with qualities of a personality type known as introversion, which means that they feel more comfortable focusing on their inner thoughts and ideas, rather than what’s happening externally.

A psychologist named Carl Jung began using the terms introvert and extrovert in the 1920s. These two personality types sort people into how they get or spend their energy. Introverts, Jung said, turn to their own minds to recharge, while extroverts seek out other people for their energy needs.

Social introverts, Thinking introverts, Anxious introverts, Restrained/inhibited introverts.

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Are you an Introvert?

How it works

Let me start off by asking everyone if you think you’re an introvert? For now remember your answers and see if by the end of this speech you find yourselves with a different result. Okay, I am here today trying to be something I’m not. Which is something I’ve been trying to do for awhile now: whether its sharing my ideas, participating in class, writing a speech, or publically speaking in front of people. Now some of you might be thinking ‘she sounds shy’ or ‘she seems nervous.

’ And yes, all of those things are very true but, why? To word it simply, I am an Introvert. Now what is an introvert? According to merriam webster dictionary website an introvert is “a reserved or shy person who enjoys spending time alone.” For others being an introvert means being a quiet person who keeps thoughts to themselves and who loves their personal time. But this doesn’t mean that outgoing people can’t be introverts too, if they enjoy some quiet time to themselves then more than likely they too are introverts at least to a certain extent. So the main idea I want to address today is that it’s okay to be an introvert, it’s okay to prefer to be alone, and it’s okay to be a wallflower.

But sadly society doesn’t share the same way of thinking as I do. Society stresses the idea that being an introvert is one of the worst things you can be and being an extrovert is the way to go. I am constantly told to share my voice whenever I can, to speak up and be heard, and it is often expected of me to be involved in social activities, and as an introvert these expectations are very hard to meet. We are taught that being an outgoing and sociable extrovert is always for the best, but I’m here to show you that being an introvert can have it’s perks too. Statistics show that 50% of america’s population is made of introverts, and society is constantly telling this 50% to fit into the extroverted status quo in order to be happy and to have a fulfilling life. But if you think about it from that 50% over 163 million people came: Tom Hanks, Isaac Newton, Michael Jordan, Meryl Streep, Dr. Seuss, any many other influential people. These people didn’t let the fact that their introverts stop them from achieving their goals or being happy. So neither should you just because you’re an introvert doesn’t mean you can’t achieve your dreams.

According to an study by Ronald Riggio a professor at claremont college, a lot of people assume that “introverts can’t be good leaders, having neither the natural talent nor the desire for leadership… while it is true that more introverted types might not jump at the chance to lead…circumstances can place them there regardless.” There are plenty examples of introverted leaders throughout history from Abraham Lincoln to Bill Gates. Studies show that introverts tend to be more responsible, are great listeners, are versatile, and are very compassionate and understanding. So being an introvert has no real effect on how happy or fulfilling your life will be, as long as you view it in a positive light because focusing on the negative aspects will more than likely cause you to have a pessimistic outlook towards oneself. But when you except yourself and are happy nothing is in your way of achieving your goals and dreams. Overall there is nothing wrong with being an introvert. You just need to be yourself don’t have to change to society’s expectations, because being an introvert wonderful. Now, let me ask you one last time are you an introvert?

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Introversion

5 things introverts are perfectly happy doing alone, so really, don't bother feeling sorry for us..

Posted March 12, 2019

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Did you ever see a woman sitting and eating alone in a restaurant and think, “Oh, that poor, lonely woman, eating all alone like that.”

Yeah, me neither.

Usually, when I see someone dining alone, I think, “Oh, how lovely. They’re enjoying a little me time.”

Of course, this is my bias . I imagine some people who eat alone do so out of necessity and are unhappy about it. I have read about the epidemic of loneliness many nations are suffering, and I don’t doubt that to be true. I think every restaurant should have a communal table or a friendly bar where people desiring company over dinner can find it. (And I don’t suggest a bar for drinking, necessarily; most restaurants will serve food at the bar, and these setups are often conducive to conversation, especially if it’s a neighborhood hangout.)

But that aside, I’m here to talk about people like me and other introverts who relish solitude. This post is for introverts to enjoy some validation, and it’s especially for extroverts who might see us out there on our own and make the mistake of feeling sorry for us.

Really—don't bother. Here are five things many introverts are perfectly happy to do alone. And I'm sure there are others.

1. Dinner for one

No kidding, dining alone is no big deal—and it would be even less of a big deal without pitying looks from other diners. It’s actually quite pleasant. Granted, I prefer to dine early if I’m solo so that I don’t get the fisheye from servers who resent my occupying a two-top with my singular self when the restaurant is hopping. But what’s so bad about sitting quietly in a nice place, perhaps with a good book, and having a well-prepared meal (in a perfect world) brought to me by someone whose purpose is to make sure I have a pleasant experience? And then, bonus, not having to wash dishes afterward.

So don’t feel sorry for me. Or if you do, just send me a consolation drink and then leave me alone to enjoy it.

2. Solo movies

I consider going to movies alone a tremendous luxury, especially if I am so indulgent as to do it in the afternoon. Double luxury. I love to sit in the cosseting dark in a comfy theater seat, perhaps with an unhealthy and overpriced sweet or salty something from the candy counter, watching a movie I picked for myself without the slightest consideration of what anyone else might want to see. I must confess that when I go to a movie with my husband or a friend, I often get so wrapped up in worrying about whether the other person is enjoying the movie, I forget to enjoy it myself. (One of my many nobody-suffers-but-me quirks.) Sometimes I’m sorry not to have anyone to discuss the film with afterward, but only sometimes. Usually, I’m happy to just discuss it with myself, and it’s nice, because I almost always agree with me.

3. Hiking in solitude

For me, hiking is meditation . Listening to the rhythm of my footsteps on the path, pausing to look for birds and note miscellaneous rustling in the trees and undergrowth, taking in the sight of branches making lace against the sky or the path unspooling before me—all these pleasures are best absorbed in solitude. While I like to do my urban walking workouts hooked up to music that keeps me on a pace, hiking is for quiet contemplation and mindfully experiencing nature. I even try to choose times and places where I am likely to encounter a minimal number of other hikers. I don’t want to hear their conversations either. (Yes, I always let someone know where I am going, to be safe.)

4. Traveling unaccompanied

This is perhaps an acquired taste, because it requires a certain level of confidence and courage that not everyone has. But for many of us, solo travel is a soul-nourishing delight. (In fact, an essay about being an introverted traveler launched my career as a professional introvert many years ago; you can read it here .)

I am addicted to that untethered feeling, the experience of being 100 percent present in a new place without even the touchstone of companionship from home; the feeling of being just one small piece of a very large world; the ability to use my precious time exactly as I choose, with no negotiation. Maybe that means going to a museum and sitting for 30 minutes in front of an artwork that particularly attracts me. Maybe it means eating strawberries and pretzels in a park for dinner. Maybe it means skipping the sight everyone says you must see because it just doesn’t interest me all that much.

I love road-tripping alone, singing along to music nobody else likes. I love hotels alone, watching sitcom reruns late into the night and sprawling across the bed like it’s all mine, because it is. I love going back to the same restaurant three nights in a row, because I like it there, and nobody can stop me.

While not specifically about traveling solo, you can read some of my tips for introverted travelers here .

5. Staying home alone

For heaven’s sake, don’t for a minute imagine I’m sad and lonely when I’m sitting home alone while everyone else is at the parteeeeee . Actually, I think even extroverts crave uninterrupted, absolutely solitary time at home. I can’t tell you how many conversations I’ve had with people about the stress of a spouse who is always home. I am fortunate to have the house to myself during the workday, and even so, I kinda wish my husband traveled sometimes so I could have uninterrupted days and nights occasionally. For some reason, it isn’t the same if the person is home, but in another room. There is something about being aware that there is another person in the house that changes the experience. It is semi-solitude at best.

Time at home alone on nobody’s schedule, considering nobody’s needs, listening to nobody, and feeling nobody’s energy bump up against ours is not only delicious to introverts—it is absolutely essential to our well-being. It is when our busy brains have a chance to quiet, it provides mental space for creativity , it dejangles our often-jangled nerves. It is absolutely nothing against our loved ones. We love them very much. It has nothing to do with anyone else, actually. It’s just what we need. And I bet if even the most extroverted extroverts were honest with themselves, they would admit they need it too.

Now, let me be clear: Just because we are happy doing these things alone, that doesn’t mean we don’t like doing them with people. We like that too, with the right people. It’s just that we don’t want anyone to get the wrong impression when they see us at a table for one, or hiking without company, or all alone at the movie theater. You really don’t have to feel sorry for us unless we ask you to. Chances are very good that we’re alone because we want to be.

Introverts, what other activities are you perfectly happy doing solo? (Keep it clean, please. : ) )

Facebook image: Iryna Inshyna

LinkedIn image: Aila Images/Shutterstock

Sophia Dembling is a Dallas-based writer and the author of Introverts in Love: The Quiet Way to Happily Ever After.

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